Sex in early pregnancy...

[Big Bee]

Hi,

I’d just like to start by saying that I know sex in pregnancy is generally considered safe throughout all trimesters, that’s not really my concern here....
What IS bothering me is that I had a CP last cycle and my bleed started directly after me and my husband had been having sex. We were lucky enough to get pregnant again this cycle but now I’m scared of having sex in case it happens again. I know it’s stupid to think like that because it was just a coincidence it happened at that exact time and, although I know sex didn’t trigger the CP, I just can’t get it out of my head that it might happen again.

What can I do? I cant spend the rest of this trimester being scared to have sex!!

 

[Donna88]

It's completely upto you; how far along are you?

If you don't feel comfortable then don't do it until you've had your scan and have that reassurance.

We only had sex once in tri one as I had a bleed and although it wasn't related to sex I felt the same as you and worried that if I had sex again it would start another bleed. Although I know that sex is safe during pregnancy I also know if I had bled after having sex then I wouldn't have forgiven myself (once the thought had entered my head)

We've since been told not to have sex because of my placenta being low, I've found this difficult but again because we have a reason it's something to hang onto. We have another scan at 32 weeks and I'm hoping they give me the all clear and we can go for it. The information I've read online says that we should be okay until later on in pregnancy but again because our midwives have told us not to I'm not going to (I've talked this through with my husband and he agrees too) because although it should be okay; we wouldn't forgive ourselves if it did trigger a bleed again.



The first trimester isn't that long in the grand scheme of things and I'm sure considering your past experience your partner will be understanding. There are other things you can both do that don't involve penetration too

 

[Big Bee]

It's completely upto you; how far along are you?

If you don't feel comfortable then don't do it until you've had your scan and have that reassurance.

We only had sex once in tri one as I had a bleed and although it wasn't related to sex I felt the same as you and worried that if I had sex again it would start another bleed. Although I know that sex is safe during pregnancy I also know if I had bled after having sex then I wouldn't have forgiven myself (once the thought had entered my head)

We've since been told not to have sex because of my placenta being low, I've found this difficult but again because we have a reason it's something to hang onto. We have another scan at 32 weeks and I'm hoping they give me the all clear and we can go for it. The information I've read online says that we should be okay until later on in pregnancy but again because our midwives have told us not to I'm not going to (I've talked this through with my husband and he agrees too) because although it should be okay; we wouldn't forgive ourselves if it did trigger a bleed again.



The first trimester isn't that long in the grand scheme of things and I'm sure considering your past experience your partner will be understanding. There are other things you can both do that don't involve penetration too

I’m 5 weeks today, so 3 more weeks until the first midwife appointment and 7 weeks until the first scan. I’m getting a referral to the early pregnancy clinic so hopefully they might be able to check me over sooner than that and let me know if it’s safe to continue.

I want to feel comfortable with it, I really do, but like you said - we wouldn’t forgive ourselves if something happened as a result of us having sex.

 

[night owl]

I haven’t been entirely comfortable with sex during pregnancy either, it just doesn’t feel physically comfortable, so we just do everything else apart from penetration! You don’t have to do penetration to have a sex life there’s plenty of other ‘physical acts’ you can do to keep you both happy if you catch my drift

 

[Amy P]

I was really worried about it too at first, I think if you do it the first time during pregnancy get on top then you can control the pressure/ how deep. I found this really helped me. Me and my partner we’re both scared we’d hurt the baby but we’ve
had sex 3 times since and all is fine 😊

 

[MoominGirl]

Agree with what the others have said. Do whatever you feel comfortable with. There's no right or wrong unless you've been medically advised otherwise. For me I was too exhausted in tri 1 to even think about it so waiting until after the 12 week scan was fine for us. Now in the late stages, penetration doesn't feel physically comfortable so we just don't do it. It's only for a short time.