Rethinking Maternity Leave

[Tmum]

Hi girls

Having a bad day.
Been really tired all week. Today I am zonked.
I have been planning to work until 37 weeks but with being so tired my parents have suggested maybe rethinking when I intend on going off.
I work in an office so I'm not really on my feet. I do have to go up and down stairs (or the lift) to other offices a few times a day. I'm up from 6, get us all sorted and take my lb to my parents house and they take him onto school at approx. 8. I finish work at approx. 5 and it's about and half hour journey to work. I'm in bed around 10/10.30ish.
Also I haven't been able to get anything done around the house this week because I am so tired by the time I get home so I know that is starting to stress me out. Doesn't help that the house upstairs is upside down with getting the rooms sorted for baby's arrival.

I just think am I being stubborn by trying to stay on until 37 weeks or am I being dramatic by considering what my parents are saying about finishing earlier than I'd hoped? I am hoping to take the year off and then use holidays to bring me up until September...I think, it's just so unknown and I think that's why I'm getting myself into a state today and my exhausted hormones are also clearly lurking in the background today lol!!

Eeeekkkk any advice would be brilliant as I think I may head of an emotional meltdown today lol! xx

 

[Coletteypie]

Aww you shouldn't be so hard on yourself.

Mat leave is so personal. A few woman in June mums worked right up till the end and were fab, had no issues. I stopped at 36 weeks and am still waiting on bubs arriving! But I am so glad I did. I really enjoyed first few weeks - when I still felt physically able to do things. Last week has been harder waiting on baby but no way could I have been in work. Is emotionally and physically draining and I had a few weeks rest to prepare for this bit. If you are finding it hard now then imagine how you will feel in 7 weeks time.

I say go with instinct. Maybe pull your leave forward by a week? And see how you go from there!? xx

 

[heybabya]

I was due to stop at 37 but near the end I was practically crawling to work. I work in an office too so I felt a bit bad that I was exhausted when all I do is sit and stare at a computer for 9 hours but honestly it was the getting up the same time every morning. I ended up putting in holidays so I could stop a week earlier and I was so happy that I could finally catch up on sleep and housework and not have to get up and be somewhere so early!

If you are tired then stop earlier I'd say!

 

[Mummybexee]

im 28 weeks monday and currently am:

up at 6- out the house with my son ( 15 months ) all ready at 7.30 , drop him to nursery at 8 - work all day - pick him up at 5 - get back for 5.45. tea/play and upstairs for a bath at 7. bed at 7.30

housework/chores/preparing for new baby etc

shower and bed at 10.30/11

Im going off at 36 weeks as i have some holiday to take. I went off at 37 weeks last time with no toddler to chase after but wish i would have stayed longer. At 40 weeks last time i was out shopping and doing things to try keep myself entertained

Hopin ill be ok this time around - im tired but am doing ok and will just get on with it ( aside my terrible G PGP )

Its so individula only you can make the decision based on how you feel.

have you had your bloods done for 28w app? hows yoru iron levels? are you drinking enough/eating enough as tiredness sometimes is fueled by dehydtation and needing some extra energy

 

[Jenbob]

Hi Hun I am the same! I was about to work until 37 weeks like you, but have decided to put in extra holidays and finish a week earlier at 36 weeks.
I work in office same as you and again like you have to walk up and down stairs and visit other people etc (I work in IT). I'm so tired now I think by mid July il be exhausted and the idea of working til 37 weeks scares me as I just think by then I will struggle to get out of bed never mind go to work!
By finishing a week earlier now I feel so much better and relieved knowing that's a whole week extra for me to sleep!! Honestly really happy I've decided to finish earlier.
It's a personal choice but if you are struggling now and the idea of working til 37 weeks scares you, putting in that extra week may make you feel better Hun! Hope you feel better soon anyway and you sort out your leave xxxx

 

[Tmum]

Thanks for all the replies girls I don't feel so alone or something now. Daft I know lol!
My lb finishes school in June so between my mum and MIL they'll have him until I finish work. I think an extra week or 2 with him before his little brother or sister arrives might be a good idea too! I think it will be a shock to the system after being an only child for 5 years tehe!!
I think what's stressing me is the state of the house with trying to get it sorted but being too tried in the evenings to actually progress any further, I have visions of the baby arriving and the house still being like it is lol!! Stressing myself over nothing!
Yeah Mummybexee had bloods done at 28 weeks and heard nothing. I have been very thirsty this week so maybe that has something to do with it. xx

 

[Mummybexee]

chase your blood results with your midwife just to check your levels are all ok. you may have lower iron levels. Deffo increase your water intake. Remember you sould be drinking lots and staying hydrated. Water makes your body function.

Try eating some fresh fruit little and often, to keep your energy levels up maybe a naughty choco bar after tea.

Im leaving at 36 weeks and pulling my son out of nursery all but 1 day. so ill have my hands full on maternity leave. I guess you just get on with it second time around. Some quality time with your son will be worth it. He is abut to face massive changes - least he will be able to understand them alittle better though

its hard but there are things you can do to help inprove your fatigue etc.

Office work is mentally draining too- do you get out for fresh air during the day etc? not doing that can make you drowsy and fatigue like x

 

[Bubbles22]

I'm the same. I don't mind going to work to get me out of the house as I know I would go stir crazy if I'm not working, but I find doing anything at work a chore. My concentration is non existent and my vocabulary is shocking... I can't remember basic words at the moment. I go off in 4 weeks so will be 35 weeks (4 weeks holidays due and 1 week maternity) and I just can't wait as I know if I'm tired now, I will be wrecked then.

Listen to your body, if you think you need to go off early do it, that's what the leave is there for x

 

[Natalie_reid]

Im working up till 37 weeks but ive been struggling with back pain. Im a dental nurse so its quite hard going but instead of reducing my workloaf their suggestion is go on leave earlier. Financially that isnt beneficial to me so majoryly pissed off. Seeing physio next week for my back. I suppose it depends if you think u can cope till 37 weeks xx

 

[Mrs M]

I worked quite late, but I used holidays to get me there. Taking off Wednesdays so I only worked 2 days at a time (when full time). Second time round I just took my hols early and in 1 go so I was finished around 31/32 weeks!

 

[littlemonkey]

It's definitely harder second time around! By 30 weeks with my second I was physically knackered and dragging myself into work each day. I finished a 34 weeks and so glad I did. My eldest and I ended up with chest infections the week after I finished, then I ended up in hospital for a week at 37 weeks with bells palsy and high blood pressure before having my son at 38 weeks. I'm glad I had what time I did have at home to get some rest and stuff done before he arrived.

Listen to your body and don't feel like you have to be a martyr.

 

[JJ Mum]

I'm off looking after my 5 this time, but with the 4 ive been working for, ive always stopped at 36 weeks, for a 39 week baby it's a nice few weeks , catching up with freinds, getting things in order, pottering, relax time abd allows you to pop early too, i popped at 36 last time, good job I was at home!

 

[Tmum]

Mummybexee I'm eating a good amount of fruit and veg...and chocolate lol!!! I think I'll def be more conscious about the drinking though, that could be my downfall! I would get out some lunchtimes but not everyday as our kitchen is in our building. I might make an effort to get out for a wee dander too though, anything to try and give me a bit more energy.

Bubbles that's exactly what I said yesterday, work is nearly a break from home, I know it sounds terrible! Once I get into work I have no desire to do anything lol! I have a lot of sorting to do which is great and we are getting ready to move offices so that sorting will be grand but anything that means sitting down to focus is a no no atm lol!!!

Aww Natalie that sucks that they're not being great and maybe suggesting reduced hours for the next while. I had spoke about reduced hours but then it affects my maternity pay which I don't want.

Ml you worked it out well!!!! I've a week's leave left to take so my plan was to use it for the last week in July and then start maternity in August. I'm now thinking if I finish on the 10th July we're off that next week here and it means my holiday week will be a week earlier than originally planned and therefor maternity would start the last week in July, part of me thinks will 1 week really make such a difference to my maternity when I could save myself from having a week off then having to go in for 1 week. The joys of decision making lol!!

Oh goodness littlemonkey!!! When I hear things like that and baby coming earlier than I have in my head I think that the extra couple of weeks with my lb would be well worth it!!

JJ how lucky was it that you were off? I don't think my work would cope to well with trying to deliver a baby hahaha!!!

I think I'll consider all my options over the weekend and speak to hubby then let HR know on Monday! Thanks for all of your experience girls. I know everyone and every pregnancy is different but it's nice to hear from others xx

 

[Natalie_reid]

Yeah tmum I am totally scunnered with them my colleague who is now on mat leave she was in the phone to acas all throughout her pregnancy and at midwife apps all they spoke about was how stressed she was getting at work. Financially it works out better if I work right up so saying go on leave early isnt even an option and was a complete waste of a conversation. I was ment to be on reception for 2 days this week and I thought great gives my back a rest but out of pure spite because I booked a physio app and have been complaining with my back he decided ive to be in surgery. You honestly couldn't make it up at my work they are an utter disgrace xx

 

[xjdx]

My holiday year is April to march, so I've saved all my holidays / bank holidays until the end. I was starting my holidays next week but the shop I work for is closing down. So I'm staying until the 27th June so we all leave together like when we started together.
I will be leaving work at 34 and half weeks on holiday, until the week of my due date. But now they owe me two weeks holiday pay on top.
I'm shattered, people take things in different ways. I never expected the place I worked for to be closing, it's been an emotional time. I'm just ready for a break now.

Do what's best for you Hun xx