REALLY MAD WITH THIS STEREOTYPE

[soconfused]

baby_j_21 WROTE:
im sorry but it does matter how old you are when your decideing to have children im 21 and havin my first child and i have a really strong relation ship with my partner but emotionly it is hard been pregnant everythin goes threw your head and women do my headin when they are saying i dont know what to do now weather to keeep the child or not IM SORRRY BUT USE CONTRACEPTION ITS FREE its hard but if you are willing to have sex with sumone u are in a relationship or a one night stand WITHOUT CONTRACEPTION you should know what the risks are i planned my child and i would never ever think about abortion thats my opinion thats another life a human growing with a heartbeat dont punish that childs life because you aint ready if you aint in a longterm relationship and u aint stable enough to bring a child into the world use comdomssssssssss sorry if i have afended anyone but if you dont want to get pregnant keep your legs closed or use contraception ...

IN REPLY:
FOR YOUR INFORMATION I WAS ON THE PILL AND STILL GOT PREGNANT! UNLESS YOU FORGOT NO CONTRACEPTION IS 100% EFFECTIVE, THE PILL I USE IS 98.SUMTHIN% SO THAT MEANS 2 PEOPLE OUT OF EVERY 100 GET PREGNANT WHILST USING IT.

IM SORRY BUT IM FED UP WITH PEOPLE JUDGING PREGNANT TEENAGERS AND SAYING USE CONTRACEPTION OR DONT HAVE SEX. IM NOT SAYING THAT ALL TEENAGERS USE CONTRACEPTION BECAUSE OBVIOUSLY THERE ARE THOSE THAT DONT! BUT WHY DO THE TEENAGERS THAT GENUINELY JUST GET CAUGHT OUT GET PENALISED ASWELL???
BECAUSE THEY ARE CERTAIN PEOPLE IN THE WORLS THAT ARE OBVIOULY SO PATHETIC THAT THEY SHOOT THERE MOUTH OFF BEFORE PUTTING THERE BRAIN IN GEAR!

 

[soconfused]

thnx is nice to know someone else feels like i do

 

me and my b/f used a condom every time and i was on the pill and me being forgetful still used condoms, my pregnancy was a total accident but i wouldnt have change it forever anything. abortion for me never was an option but it doesnt mean i am not scared and worried about how well i will be able to provide for my baby at such a young age.

 

[Lisa J]

i completely agree i was on the pill,
people who judge without knowing the situation should keep their thoughts to themselves!!!!!!
MAKES ME MAD!!!!!

 

[dani200420052000]

I think your right girls....once its happened theres no need to dwell on the past- so ppl just dont understand all these stuck up ppl- where everything in there lives is so perfect, ppl make mistakes and thats the way it goes.... but in the end those silly moments of forgeting to take the pill or forgeting to use a condom can then turn out to be the best thing that as ever happened to them... They have been blessed with a little miracle baby... Congrats to youus all for being so brave and standing up 4 yourselfs xx

 

[HayleyB]

It makes me mad that everyone assumes that people who have abortions are to blame for getting pregnant.
I was raped by a boy from school at 16 and fell pregnant, I made the decision at the time to have an abortion, it has taken 7 years of counselling for me to finally forgive myself for what I did.

I can't believe it took so long for me to realise that if I was in the same postion again at 16 years old (in effect if i had to re-live that time) I would make the same decision. You can only make the decision based on the information you have at the time - it took a long time for my counsellor to get that through to me.

I don't regret what I did then, and I wouldn't change it for the world now.....
I have prayed everyday that someday I would meet a nice man who would love me for me, and be able to see past what i've been through (which i never could!)
And one day Graham walked into my life... although we weren't trying we had agreed that we both wanted to be parents "whenever it happened" the day we found out we were both so happy...

People really do need to stop with the steryotyping, as you may not realise it, but by saying what you've said you can affect people who are having trouble letting go of thier decision, whatever thier reasons for it, you should respect that!!

Sorry for the essay!

xx

 

[-Cat-]

Its great to see you girls are all such strong characters.
I became pregnant while I was a teenager after a condom failed and the morning after pill also failed me. I was engaged at the time, and had been with may partner for over a year and was treated really badly by my doctor like I had been irrisponsible. I chose to have an abortion as I was awaiting spinal surgery and it would have been very dangerous for my to try to carry a baby. Now I'm older and ready to have a child, but of couse not everyone has the choice and you have to deal with the situation, I know some of your stories and inderstand some of you are going this alone, without a supportive partner, and all I can say is good for you, you have all been very strong in what is a very hard time physically and emotionally so congrats and good luck to you all.

What I object to is women who get pregnant just so they can sit at home in a place paid for by the council, cause they don't want to have to get a job and they want to live in benefits, and people like me have to work hard and pay taxes! But women like that are all ages, teen mums tend to all be pegion holed as being like that when the fact is women of all ages can be guilty of it!

So b****ks to anyone that gives you hastle, you have all been responsible, and shown just how responsible you are for your ages to undertake rasing a child!

 

[midwife_online]

Hiya Girls!!

I have to say that comments made from a soapbox of judgement and conviction can at times be very destructive...I am of course referring to the opinionated comments of Baby-J.

Having been a midwife (and a nurse before that) I am acutely aware that a victim blaming culture is one that we need to steer away from, instead a culture of support is a great deal more constructive.

Yes...Contraceptive issues are present in our society, and the teenage pregnancy rates are rising...but that is not to say ignorance is the sole reason for becoming pregnant. More often than we would like to see, contraceptive devices fail from time to time putting many women in a very awkward position. There are cases of abuse that some of you girls have experienced, and I am deeply sorry that you have been through that in your lives, but to carry on being persecuted as a result puts a shame on society doesn't it??

As much as women have a choice...to a certain degree, it is often the vulnerable that feel alone and unable to ask for help. Opinions regarding abortion are very personal to each and every one of us...and sometimes there are very good reasons for the choice to be made...this is not to say that life is not valued, but rather tha quality of life is considered in many angles...it takes a lot to decide which path you are going to take...and any woman that has to make this decision very often feels alone, judged, and pressured by people around them eager to climb on their soap box, beating out the words of naivity.

Whenever you voice your opinions...you must think what it is like in someone else's shoes...everyone leads a different life with different pressures.

So my point is this....stick by what you feel is right for you, don't let other's make you feel dirty, guilty, wrong, prejudged...live for today..your life..and the life of your baby

Sorry I'm a gas bag aren't I.

Well...I support you all...keep sharing your opinions..it is very interesting to hear what you say!

Kieren