Pregnancy, Labour, Birth and BOOKS!

[bonjourkatie]

Hi everyone!
Since hitting the second trimester I feel like I really need to get clued up on everything that is labour, birth and looking after a newborn and beyond!

Does anyone have any books to recommend? I’ve been looking on amazon but reviews are conflicting so I don’t want to spend loads of money for the book to be rubbish!

Thank you in advance

 

[pupperino]

Great thread idea! I have liked the Mayo Clinic's Guide to a Healthy Pregnancy - which also includes labour and the early days after birth (e.g. issues with breastfeeding). Pros - it is very comprehensive! Cons - tailored for American's, but I think all the research and info is pretty up to date and universal!

The NHS NICE guidelines also have great stuff - and it's free and what your doctors would likely refer to (e.g. Overview | Intrapartum care for healthy women and babies | Guidance | NICE) - con for me is that it's very UK haha, can't win

 

[LucyC]

I’ve been reading the positive birth book which I’ve found quite an easy read so far. It’s all about thinking about labour differently and to reduce fear. It does contain some concepts that aren’t really my kind of thing but overall it’s been useful xx

 

[MoominGirl]

Thought I'd add to this now I'm out the other side as what I thought I needed when I was pregnant wasn't necessarily that useful once little man was actually here!!

I second the Positive Birth Book and also Mindful Hypnobirthing. Although our labour didn't go to plan both books were still useful and I would take the same approach to labour again if we have another. I had an excellent pregnancy but unforeseen complications on the day so much of what happened was just bad luck really. I didn't have a 'pregnancy' book as such and I don't regret not having one.

I did get the Expectant Dad's Handbook for the very anxious OH!! He found it useful just to get a general idea of what to expect all in one place but I think he would say that nothing could really prepare him for it!! I'd agree with that too. I think a good general overview and an idea of what you'd ideally like accompanied by an open mind really is the best way!!

Although not a book, I really enjoyed Daisy Birthing classes. Although I wasn't able to use everything I was taught due to the complications, what I did manage was really useful and I would do them again with another baby.

As far as looking after a newborn - we didn't have a book and I can't stress enough how glad I am that we didn't have a book as I probably would have thrown it in the bin!! Google is your friend at 3am and you really do just learn as you go along!! You will find what works for you and your baby and no book can tell you that. If you really must buy something, I would stay away from anything that promises baby will sleep through or attempts to impose any sort of routine. It just gives false expectation when you're already overwhelmed. I definitely wouldn't put myself under nearly as much pressure second time round.

One thing both me and the OH wish we had known more about was the initial postnatal period. It really is tough so rather than prepare people, my experience is that people just don't talk about it at all. It still wouldn't have been easy but again some realistic expectation for both of us would have been helpful especially regarding the emotional side and my physical recovery. This was a glaring omission from our antenatal course and a massive bug bear of mine now. That antenatal course I definitely wouldn't have bothered with if I knew what I knew now!!

Hope some of that helps!!

 

[Abi88]

Great thread idea! I have liked the Mayo Clinic's Guide to a Healthy Pregnancy - which also includes labour and the early days after birth (e.g. issues with breastfeeding). Pros - it is very comprehensive! Cons - tailored for American's, but I think all the research and info is pretty up to date and universal!

The NHS NICE guidelines also have great stuff - and it's free and what your doctors would likely refer to (e.g. Overview | Intrapartum care for healthy women and babies | Guidance | NICE) - con for me is that it's very UK haha, can't win

I second the mayo clinic book. I couldn't get on with 'what to expect' as it was too full of puns. The mayo clinic book had all the same info but in a less irritating style! They also do a great book for the first year that covers all the baby basics.

 

[bonjourkatie]

Great thread idea! I have liked the Mayo Clinic's Guide to a Healthy Pregnancy - which also includes labour and the early days after birth (e.g. issues with breastfeeding). Pros - it is very comprehensive! Cons - tailored for American's, but I think all the research and info is pretty up to date and universal!

The NHS NICE guidelines also have great stuff - and it's free and what your doctors would likely refer to (e.g. Overview | Intrapartum care for healthy women and babies | Guidance | NICE) - con for me is that it's very UK haha, can't win

I’ll definitely look into both of these!

Ahh, it’s a tricky one for you! I guess at least the facts of labour signs and all that should be the same across all of them! X

 

[bonjourkatie]

I’ve been reading the positive birth book which I’ve found quite an easy read so far. It’s all about thinking about labour differently and to reduce fear. It does contain some concepts that aren’t really my kind of thing but overall it’s been useful xx

I’m all about this. I’ve bought the positive birth company podcasts to listen to and try to channel so hypnobirthing into my plan. I think looking at it positively will really help me!
Thank you xx

 

[bonjourkatie]

Thought I'd add to this now I'm out the other side as what I thought I needed when I was pregnant wasn't necessarily that useful once little man was actually here!!

I second the Positive Birth Book and also Mindful Hypnobirthing. Although our labour didn't go to plan both books were still useful and I would take the same approach to labour again if we have another. I had an excellent pregnancy but unforeseen complications on the day so much of what happened was just bad luck really. I didn't have a 'pregnancy' book as such and I don't regret not having one.

I did get the Expectant Dad's Handbook for the very anxious OH!! He found it useful just to get a general idea of what to expect all in one place but I think he would say that nothing could really prepare him for it!! I'd agree with that too. I think a good general overview and an idea of what you'd ideally like accompanied by an open mind really is the best way!!

Although not a book, I really enjoyed Daisy Birthing classes. Although I wasn't able to use everything I was taught due to the complications, what I did manage was really useful and I would do them again with another baby.

As far as looking after a newborn - we didn't have a book and I can't stress enough how glad I am that we didn't have a book as I probably would have thrown it in the bin!! Google is your friend at 3am and you really do just learn as you go along!! You will find what works for you and your baby and no book can tell you that. If you really must buy something, I would stay away from anything that promises baby will sleep through or attempts to impose any sort of routine. It just gives false expectation when you're already overwhelmed. I definitely wouldn't put myself under nearly as much pressure second time round.

One thing both me and the OH wish we had known more about was the initial postnatal period. It really is tough so rather than prepare people, my experience is that people just don't talk about it at all. It still wouldn't have been easy but again some realistic expectation for both of us would have been helpful especially regarding the emotional side and my physical recovery. This was a glaring omission from our antenatal course and a massive bug bear of mine now. That antenatal course I definitely wouldn't have bothered with if I knew what I knew now!!

Hope some of that helps!!

It’s so useful to have your point of view so thank you!
My OH is very anxious and is worrying that I “know more” than him but I’m trying to explain that I will cause it affects me more directly and so I’m googling everything!!

Thank you so much for your help c

 

[bonjourkatie]

I second the mayo clinic book. I couldn't get on with 'what to expect' as it was too full of puns. The mayo clinic book had all the same info but in a less irritating style! They also do a great book for the first year that covers all the baby basics.

I’ll look into this! Thank you x

 

[Roo87]

We had what to expect, ask a midwife (which is a pretty good q & a book) & pregnancy & birth ( which was a more light hearted book).

To be honest they all say pretty much the same thing, just depends on the format you like. We also did NCT which was good - however my labour & birth didn’t go as any of the books / NCT lady said! So I guess you can never be fully prepared - just trust the midwives and doctors, they’re amazing .

Good luck
Rx

 

[bonjourkatie]

Haha

We had what to expect, ask a midwife (which is a pretty good q & a book) & pregnancy & birth ( which was a more light hearted book).

To be honest they all say pretty much the same thing, just depends on the format you like. We also did NCT which was good - however my labour & birth didn’t go as any of the books / NCT lady said! So I guess you can never be fully prepared - just trust the midwives and doctors, they’re amazing .

Good luck
Rx

Haha, I don’t think I’ll ever feel ready or clued up!
Thank you for your suggestions x

 

[MoominGirl]

I’ll definitely look into both of these!

Ahh, it’s a tricky one for you! I guess at least the facts of labour signs and all that should be the same across all of them! X

It's funny you say that as that's what I thought but labour is so different for every woman.

For example I know lots of people who have a long drawn out first labour and loads of early symptoms. I basically had none! Basically lost my plug and went into labour within hours. Had a baby by the following morning. I'm almost certain it would have been even quicker if I hadn't had complications. There's no real preparation. I think the best preparation was going through it once so I know what I'll be making sure won't be happening next time around!

 

[WinterWolf]

I’ve gotta agree with Moomin. Parenting books are rubbish because you’ll find what works for your baby might not be what the book says, and then you’ll be doubting yourself when you shouldn’t! If you have a question, Google can help. There’s guaranteed to be some other FTM who asked the same question somewhere before.

Not a book but I would definitely recommend the Wonder Weeks app for info. It tells you when your baby is going through mental leaps/growth spurts so you know when to expect fussiness etc.

I got all my pregnancy info from aps/pregnancy classes so didn’t even try and read a pregnancy book!

 

[IVW]

I have read three quarters of Holly Willoughby, Truly, Happy Baby and I didn't intentionally go out and get that, my mother in law had it 'laying around' so she was quick to pass it to me, when she knew the news and it really educated me, more so because I knew NOTHING!!! and I mean nothing.

She's been there, done it, got the t shirt so knew I was reading something from someone who had experience of it all. Its an easy read book and covers everything you need to know.

I got the oh 'Commando Dad' - my oh was in the RAF, so this seemed very appt and he said its really good and great for dads, although its sat in his drawer for a long while collecting dust now

 

[MissKW]

I love What to expect when your expecting, covers everything in detail!
If you plan to breastfeed I would recommend finding a supportive book for that too as many women find it difficult to start with.
For new baby though I personally wouldn't read a thing as I feel it's better to go with the flow of your individual child and find your own parenting methods as they are the only ones that will work for you