People getting me down..

[Chrissie]

Hey, sorry for posting such a long message but I'm just really annoyed, maybe it's just my hormones but some people can be so inconsiderate.

I'm 22 years old with two daughters and am ten weeks pregnant. I'm also nearly finished my first year of an access course for nursing/midwifery.. I think I'm doing okay in life so far lol.. but recently I've been telling a few people that I'm pregnant and haven't had any 'congratulations' reponses or anything even remotely positive.. they're all usually 'oh God you're mental..' or 'you're gonna have your hands full' or 'you need your head checked' etc.

Is it just me or are those horrible things to say to an expectant mother? I would NEVER say that to anyone. It's so negative and patronising.

Has it happened to anyone else? Obviously my pregnancies weren't planned but I don't care about that, I love my life and wouldn't have it any other way.

Maybe it's because of my age that people can feel they can say those things to me. I can't imagine them saying it to my 36 year old sister..

xo

 

[Zazu]

Try not to let people bother you, some people just don't think before they speak. As long as you are happy!

 

[MrsR]

That's awful! I can't believe no one has said congrats! Whether planned or not you just wouldn't say these things! x I haven't experienced this in pregnancy but before I was pg I was quite slim and people used to say 'god you're thin' and 'have a meal'! (I eat healthily and had a perfect bmi for my height and never dieted) it used to drive me mad. You wouldn't walk up to someone and say 'god you're fat, stop eating' or 'wow you're looking old'! x I'm looking at doing nursing after bubba arrives, how are you liking it? x As long as you're happy and your partner is happy that's all that counts in my book x

 

[Lulu_Laroo]

Arrrrgh, my god I HATE people like that, who judge and make assumptions without even knowing you. Take absolutely no notice. YOU know you've done extremely well and yes you should be proud of yourself! If people aren't willing to accept that, it's them who are the losers.

Oh, and CONGRATS! Hehe xxx

 

[Lulu_Laroo]

Oh, and I'm 26 and this is my first pregnancy, but I've still had certain people say to me "Oh, don't you want to go on nice holidays and have a bit more fun first before you settle down?" - I'm like NO I'm perfectly ready and happy thank you very much! So it just proves you're always gonna get these smart arses thinking they know best! Grrrrrrr lol. x

 

[charlene09]

try not to let it bother you hun

That is an horrible thing to say to you , but as long as you are happy age dosent matter!! just because you have 2 children and 1 on the way dosent give them the right to say things like that.

you dont need your head checking atal , you sound like you are getting on well in life
Just ignore what they say!! x

 

[Lacey's Mummy]

Just ignore them. My best friend said to me your mad having another child cos ive not got a drinking buddy no more! i never even used to go out drinking with her! I just grinned and said im really looking forward to having another baby. Well done for nearly completing your first year, that must've been hard with 2 children but you've stuck at it and congrats on your pregnancy x x x

 

[Princess81]

I think you should react to them by saying, well I'm really happy about it - "I love my kids and love my life - I just wish that other people could be happy for me too" That'll shut em up.

 

[bearsmummy]

When i told people i got abuse from them. They were people i thought at the time were my friends but after saying i was going to be a rubbish mom and that i didn't deserve to have a baby i realised they weren't worth my time. You just have to hold your head up and just be like 'whatever, i'm happy so i don't see what it has to do with you.' I hope you cheer up soon they don't sound at all worth your bother.

Congratulations by the way!

x

 

[ashtonsmum]

hey i totally understand im 22 and have a 10 month old son and i am pregnant with no 2 i am married and my husband and i always wanted 2 close together but no one understands all my mates r still partying and look at me as if i got pregnant as a teenager with some random guy even though my husband and i planned both ones, dont let it get to u ur better off than all of them u will soon have 3 beautiful children while they are all still drinking and not doing anything with their lives.

CONGRATULATIONS xxxxx

 

[nic0la]

Hiya.

I think some people just dont feel comfortable saying congratulations so they have to say something negative. Im kind of the oppersite end to you im 38 with an eleven year old son and people have said I must be mad to go back to nappies (the baby not me ) The worst people are those who start with the sentence " if I were you........" Feel like shouting WELL your not me !!!!!!!


Anyhoo rant over, congratulations on the pregnancy and good luck with the nursing , I qualified not so long ago and it is a brilliant career. well done...

 

[Chrissie]

Thanks you've all cheered me up! I know some people just can't help but be negative.. I pity them but it still gets to me.

Nicola my mum had 4 kids close together in her 20s then I came along when she was 38. She said I was the easiest because she was older and more experienced etc.

Congratulations to you all too by the way I'll think of a witty response next time someone says something like that to me!

xo

 

[Rosie's Mummy]

She's most likely to be jealous! Take no notice although I know how things can get to you

 

[AugustMum]

Ive only had two negative responses so far, but Ive been so surprised by everyone else. I was 21 when I found out I was expecting my first and still at uni and everyones been fantastic! They say you find out who your true friends are when you have children and I can honestly say that mine have truly stepped up to the plate. However, the first person who was horrible about it was someone I didnt know and was calling me a failure and a disappointment...saying my parents would be ashamed but if i finished my studies they would think of me as less of a failure and at the time I just wanted to cry but when I look back I wish Id told her where to shove it. No one has the right to say anything but congratulations to you. Its amazing bringing someone into the world and whether planned or not it should be celebrated!!!

Congratulations to you and hope everything goes wonderfully for you! xx

 

[xxbeckyxx]

Aww I know exactly what you mean. I'm 21 and in a perfectly stable relationship etc but I had one old lady tell me not to dare have kids before I married because it's not fair on the children! She didn't even know I was pregnant, but thought she'd pass comment for some reason!
Some people just have to have their little say!
I'm a bit worried about when I start showing because I'm quite small and can look young for my age (can pass for 16 without make up lol), so I reckon I'll get some dirty looks!

 

[charlene09]

xxbeckyxx Im the same I look so young for my age .. Shame for us isnt it lool x

 

[xxbeckyxx]

Lol we'll be grateful for it when we hit thirty!

 

[amyjayne77]

I got that too ..... just cos i have 2 myself and 2 step kids, the reactions I got from the playground was " I take it this was an accident" which it was not. My granny nearly had a nervous breakdown and was convinced I was ruining my life. Nobody congratulated us at all and it really hurt. Sometimes when we told people we were met with stunned looks and my hubby would break the silence, turn to me and say "congratulations!" which embarassed them.

The help (the very little we got) from my mum with the children has mysteriously stopped, i presume, just cos I am not living my life the way she would like.

Give these people time to get over themselves and their over indulgent sense of self importance and enjoy your pregnancy. You deserve to as much as anybody else.