no inklings or feelings for bump as yet

[julio]

well, i am over 19 weeks now and still havent felt anything in my bump...of which there is rather a large one beginning to appear i also havent really felt any real feelings yet...
i was overjoyed to find out i was pregnant as we were trying and i have always wanted kids yet i am still waiting for some overwhelming feeling of love and maternal stuff but nothing. i pat my bump and now and then say the odd thing but it is as though there is nothing there yet!! Is this normal??? I have heard the HB a couple of times briefly which was lovely but still didnt get that rush of what i imagine motherly love would be like. i also havent had any sort of inkling as to whether it is a B or G!! one of my friends makes me feel guilty all the time as i really would like a girl although i obviously want it to be fine above all else and all i get is "well it shouldnt matter as long as it is fine" and when i try to explain that i feel like that firstly and then have a preference as do a lot she tells me "no not everyone does!" making me feel really crappy about myself sometimes and i am already worried coz im not feeling anything yet! Scan on Tuesday so hopefully once i know everything is ok il feel better...feel like i am holding my breath waiting at the mo!!
sorry, long rant

 

[x_larlybelle_x]

hopefully the scan will put you at ease hun, i hate people that ask you a question then criticise you for having an opinion!

Will you be finding out the sex on Tuesday?

to make u feel a bit better x

 

[Hayley1608]

i wouldnt worry if you haven't felt any movement as of yet. I didn't feel anything until about 21 weeks and even then i wasn't 100% sure what it was!

I think everybody develops maternal feelings at different times... your obviously happy about being pregnant as you have thought about the sex of the baby and there was a little smiley face i saw in your post ! Don't let your friend make you feel guilty... just because you are hoping for a girl doesn't mean you would love your little boy any less if you had one.

xxx

 

[julio]

aww thanks hun. yep i will be finding out coz i am just tooooo impatient and all the neutral clothes seem to be very grey at the mo so really wanna start shopping
lol plus everyone i meet keeps telling me i am having a boy and people who know my hubby through work and have never met me say a boy...not one person has said a girl yet must be an alien in there i think

 

[julio]

love these forums coz people just dont judge and offer so much good advice and support!!

 

[Hayley1608]

thats what we are all here for... everybody needs a bit of reassuring sometimes!

btw... EVERYBODY told me i was having a boy to... I even started reffering to my bump as him because people convinced me. Turned out she was a girl!

xxx

 

[julio]

lol, well i shall update hopefully on Tues unless it is covering it up AND crossing its legs

 

[Hayley1608]

ohh yes let us know and good luck!

x

 

[Lilelephant]

Julio don't worry bout not feeling much yet it was t until I felt baby move and found out it was a he now I am totally in live with him x

 

[Susanne]

I think these feelings you're waiting for come at different times for different people, sometimes not until the baby is born, and that's ok, too! I hope your scan on Tuesday goes well, and I hope it's a girl, although I am sure you will love a boy just the same! I've got my scan on Tuesday as well - am wishing tomorrow away...

 

[Niknak]

I know exactly how you feel - don't get me wrong I am really pleased to be pregnant as we had always planned to have a family but it happened a lot earlier than I was expecting! It is totally not the babies fault, we are totally responsible for not using protection the night my husband came back from Afghanistan! However the repercussions of having a baby at this point in my career are not great and I will potentially have to give up the best job I have ever had BUT I know that as soon as he (just found out!!!) arrives everything will be brilliant and he will be the best thing in our lives! It is sometimes just quite hard as everyone is sooooo excited for us and I still don't feel like I have quite got my head around it! It also doesn't really help that because I haven't really got a bump my boss keeps saying 'are you sure your pregnant?!'
Now I know that the baby is a little boy it all seems a lot more real and more exciting, I am away with work for the next 3 weeks and my husband is going to try and sort out the nursery as we have just moved house - I think when I get back to see a cot etc it will all seem very real!!!
I think everyone is different and although it's great having friends who are preggers at the same time there can almost be added pressure to be feeling/thinking the same things - don't worry I am sure that when our little bundles of joy arrive we wouldn't change things for the world!!!

 

[l_maclean]

I wouldnt worry about the Rush - it'll be there eventually. like someone said above - you're obviously happy about being pregnant.

I hate the sex question as well - some folk think you shouldnt have a prefernece - but i def agree that most people do - doesnt mean you'd love the other any less. I'd choose a girl first - but wouldnt be disappointed with a boy.

xxx

 

[julio]

Thanks everyone so much kind support
xxx

 

[x_larlybelle_x]

that's what we are here for

 

[jomc]

I think ur having a girl

Dont worry hun, everyone feels different at different times. Its difficult when u dont feel the baby as theres a bit of a sense of disbelief. Dont put any pressure on yourself xxx

 

[julio]

well sorry people i hadnt had chance to come back on until today
Had my scan this morning and apart from having to go out for a walk and a brew and come back so they could check the spine lol everything is absolutely fine...phew!!!
and.....we are having......a....
GIRL!!!!!!!

 

[Hayley1608]

ahhhh!

how exciting!

Really happy for you julio.

xxx

 

[julio]

thanks Hayley, just seen ur other one too...phew relief and breathe lol!!

 

[Joo]

Aw, congrats on team pink xxx

 

[l_maclean]

Congratulations - thats brilliant.
xxx