Miscarriage at 7-8 weeks

[sarah.connors]

Im supposed to be 7-8 weeks pregnant today, but I started bleeding so I went to the doctor for a check up. They did a scan and I knew something was wrong as soon as I only saw the sac, youre supposed to see more at 8 weeks. She confirmed my thoughts, and the fetus likely had stopped growing in week 6 (looking at the size). And it looked like the lining was thinning. I feel absolutely gutted, like Ive dissapointed my partner. I wonder what I did wrong, if I did something wrong. Did I eat something I wasnt supposed to (like salami etc. ) before I knew I was pregnant? Is there something wrong with my eggs? I wonder what went wrong and I feel so sad, cause I know I will never get any answers to these questions. Its so weird, cause Ive had symptoms up and till this point (like nausea) since after week 6 too.

My doctor tried to assure me nothing was wrong, Im young and Ive had children before not very long ago. My ovaries and my uterus looked fine (she could even tell the egg had come from the left ovary, didnt know they could do that). Most women go on to have successfull pregnancies even after a loss, and in recent years miscarriages have become more common (they dont know why, possibly that people figure out earlier that they are pregnant, or other factors) and up to 30% of pregnancies end in miscarriage. But I still feel so sad. I was starting to feel like miscarriage risk was getting rather low, since Im hitting week 8 (it gets progressively lower throughout pregnancy) but I guess I was only 6 weeks along really
Idk where to go from here, will the bleeding be painful? How long til I feel "normal" ? Cause now I just feel gutted...

 

[GBLiz]

hi, i have miscarried twice at 7-8 weeks, its so common for the embryo to fail to survive the next step after implanting, and then a couple of weeks later the bleeding starts. Chances are it never even got to have a heaqrtbeat and something was wrong from the start- it is very very unlikley to be anything you did.

I also had that ashamed feeling of disappointing people which really doesnt make sense because it's us going through the worst part of it. Both my miscarriages- one i started bleeding spontaeously like you and one was a mmc and i waited 4 weeks for it to miscarry naturally) - both were just like a heavy period amount of blood and not much pain. There is not so much tissue matter at this early stage so hopefully it will just be a few days that trails off.

 

[sarah.connors]

hi, i have miscarried twice at 7-8 weeks, its so common for the embryo to fail to survive the next step after implanting, and then a couple of weeks later the bleeding starts. Chances are it never even got to have a heaqrtbeat and something was wrong from the start- it is very very unlikley to be anything you did.

I also had that ashamed feeling of disappointing people which really doesnt make sense because it's us going through the worst part of it. Both my miscarriages- one i started bleeding spontaeously like you and one was a mmc and i waited 4 weeks for it to miscarry naturally) - both were just like a heavy period amount of blood and not much pain. There is not so much tissue matter at this early stage so hopefully it will just be a few days that trails off.

Yeah, just the guilt is terrible, even though it doesnt make any sense to feel guilty. Its like, he felt so happy and now its not gonna happen, and we're both sad maybe next time Ill wait to tell him till week 12, or a scan that says everything is ok.

 

[WinterWolf]

Most early miscarriages are due to chromosomal abnormalities. Your body knows it can't develop into a healthy baby so it miscarries. You couldn't have done anything to prevent it... I hope you get a rainbow soon xx

 

[Melly41]

Im so sorry to hear this sarah. Its so devastating and its feels like the end of the world but you will turn a corner. WW is right most are chromosomal abnormalities which are outside our control. I had a mmc in sep and am now 9 weeks....they say youre more fertile for 6 months after a mc so when you feel ready i hope it happens quickly for you. Xx

 

[BunnyN]

I am so sorry for your loss. Logic says it wasn't your fault, there was nothing you could do, there are no answers, if it was caused by a genic problem better now than later in pregnancy or even after birth, bla bla.... but none of that actually helps you feel better. I'm sure later losses are way worse in many ways but an early loss can be especially cruel and confusing in its own way. I remember posting after my early loss that it was like loosing everything and nothing at the same time. I was crushed but didn't know how I was supposed to grieve for a baby I had never seen and knew nothing about. For me accepting that I had lost a baby I Ioved and letting myself be sad helped me the most. Putting my feelings into words on here and talking to OH about it helped too. Huge hugs

 

[sarah.connors]

I keep hoping they are wrong since I see stories online where they measured the sac wrong and they were in fact pregnant still and not miscarrying and the doctors were just wrong, but I know most likely this isnt the case. Im not bleeding anymore, wonder when its "gonna happen", I feel so awful knowing all these pregnancy symptoms are just hormone residue...

 

[Melly41]

Ohh sarah i googled this to aftet my mmc thinking maybe theyre are wrong.i ended up opting for mva procedure as needed closure but think most women like to keep it natural. Look after yourself

 

[sarah.connors]

Ohh sarah i googled this to aftet my mmc thinking maybe theyre are wrong.i ended up opting for mva procedure as needed closure but think most women like to keep it natural. Look after yourself

I feel like if doesnt pick up over the weekend I wanna try taking misoprostol, Ive seen horror stories online with people waiting for weeks since their body still thinks its pregnant. I want it to be over with. I dont wanna be tired/nauseos and feel pregnant anymore. But I have some slight cramping sensations, so it might happen? Its weird though, its more my upper quadrant that hurts moreso than my lower, you would think it was the opposite?

 

[Melly41]

That could be stress related pain if its higher up maybe? I felt similar...just wanted closure so we could ttc again quickly. I read that it can vary hugely if natural in terms of how long it takes to pass xx

 

[sarah.connors]

That could be stress related pain if its higher up maybe? I felt similar...just wanted closure so we could ttc again quickly. I read that it can vary hugely if natural in terms of how long it takes to pass xx

I think Ill go back to the doctor over the weekend if nothing happens and ask for misoprostol, and yeah, It might be. I just feel like its so weird I started bleeding and then stopped, why didnt my body finish what it started? Stupid body... Ive had like spotting on and off the entire day though, so maybe it will come back "on" again (I hope so).

 

[Melly41]

I remember just hoping for the bleeding to stop after mva.took 15 days..but then i ovulated 2 weeks after and then had period 2 weeks after that. I also remember wishing to see a negative hpt so i know the hcg was no longer in my body which means you should ovulate shortly after...although can be a while for some. Try and treat yourself this weekend i remember habin brie for lunch and a large glass of red in the evening....it helped....temporarily! Try and rest up. Altho of youre anything like me i googled constantly after my mmc! Xx

 

[sarah.connors]

I remember just hoping for the bleeding to stop after mva.took 15 days..but then i ovulated 2 weeks after and then had period 2 weeks after that. I also remember wishing to see a negative hpt so i know the hcg was no longer in my body which means you should ovulate shortly after...although can be a while for some. Try and treat yourself this weekend i remember habin brie for lunch and a large glass of red in the evening....it helped....temporarily! Try and rest up. Altho of youre anything like me i googled constantly after my mmc! Xx

Thats me haha, googling everyones stories, and they are all so different. I have a three year old to take care of and my dads birthday this weekend (havent even told my family I was pregnant, dont much feel like it now really), and Im like, where will I even find the time to bleed out if I start to do that (especially if Im in school, missed enough already cause of pregnancy related stuff like nausea and fatigue ) . Ugh, maybe a glass of wine and a talk with my mom or a girlfriend is what I need.

 

[Melly41]

Sounds like just what the doctor ordered! I didnt tell family but think having one person to talk to would have helped. DH was great but i needed to talk and think about it much more than he did. Do what feel right xx

 

[sarah.connors]

Ugh, today I feel really bad. My son kept waking up the entire night, cause he is sick, and I cant seem to find even a minute to myself. He wants to be glued to my side He doesnt understand whats going on or that I need alone time, but all the same I do need it. And it sucks still having pregnancy symptoms (although to a lesser degree, seems like the hormones are somewhat tapering off even though threre is no baby. All this nausea, tiredness, missing school for nothing. And now I cant even focus on studying, even though I have an exam in a month

 

[Rach beattie]

I’m so sorry for ur loss Sarah it Is truly devastating. Please know that is nothing u have done and unfortunately u r just one of the unlucky few (I no this is of no comfort having been there myself). I hope u have a good support network and agree with melly that having one person to listen and talk to really does help. For me it has over four months ago now and I still like to talk and remember so having a friend really helps. The waiting is the horrible part and something I didn’t want to do as I was starting a new job that week so I opted for an mva. I hope u don’t have to wait too long. There are lots of lovely people on here for support so pop in whenever u feel like u need to talk and take care of yourself xx

 

[Melly41]

Its so cruel to still get pregnancy symptoms after a mc. Your son wont understand but can probably sense something is not right which could explain some of his clingyness. Its hard to find time on your own when you have kids. I found taking a long bath helpful and quite relaxing too. Its also waiting till theyre in bed to have time alone but i found i was just too tired to think about things at the time! Maybe having an exam will help to keep your mind focused on other things as it can drive you mad googling away....believe me i know! Just be kind to yourself this weekend x

 

[GBLiz]

i waited 4 weeks for my miscarriage to finally happen but i was very glad i did, because when it happened it was no worse than a period, not painful at all. I have heard too many horror stories of when it is forced by drugs and then its so painful and intense and i knew someone who ended up with a blood transfusion due to blood loss. That put me off intervening. But i do appreciate most people take that route

 

[sarah.connors]

i waited 4 weeks for my miscarriage to finally happen but i was very glad i did, because when it happened it was no worse than a period, not painful at all. I have heard too many horror stories of when it is forced by drugs and then its so painful and intense and i knew someone who ended up with a blood transfusion due to blood loss. That put me off intervening. But i do appreciate most people take that route

Id rather have horrible pain and for it to be over with right away tbh, than to wait 4 weeks. It will probs fuck up my easter when I was supposed to relax and finally get some child free time :/ dont wanna be bleeding all of the easter holiday and be reminded, I want it gone now. But we are all different I suppose

 

[sarah.connors]

Its so cruel to still get pregnancy symptoms after a mc. Your son wont understand but can probably sense something is not right which could explain some of his clingyness. Its hard to find time on your own when you have kids. I found taking a long bath helpful and quite relaxing too. Its also waiting till theyre in bed to have time alone but i found i was just too tired to think about things at the time! Maybe having an exam will help to keep your mind focused on other things as it can drive you mad googling away....believe me i know! Just be kind to yourself this weekend x

Difficult to get time after he sleeps these days to, he keeps waking up, Im never well rested and its exhausting. Awful timing for him to get sick, but he cant help it ofc.