mini rant!

[trixipaws]

my boyf, he is a great dad. and he does help me with the baby it does go a long way. but sometimes i get slightly irritated

since i went back to work one of my working days is a saturday, and as he does normal weekdays he has melissa on saturdays. at first i was being graduated back into work on reduced hours, so only gone for the morning. the first time, i came home and he'd done all the washing up, cleaned the kitchen and he said "i dont kno what ur on about, its a piece of piss (childcare)- iv done this, that, and allsorts" etc etc etc, it almost felt like he was tryna make me look like a lazy bones who sits on her ass all day and exaggerates about how hard looking after a baby is. he didnt take into account that he'd had a full nite's sleep the nite b4 and i could count on my fingers how many of those iv had in all the 9 months! lol anyway but i didnt complain- having the washing up done for me isnt something 2 complain about is it! lol i thought i wonder how long he'll keep this up tho

i was right, he hasnt done any house-husband-y duties since then (que sorpresa lol!) but he still likes to make out that its easy, even tho he's only done half-days so far and not a full day including dinner and bath & bed.

yesterday was my first full saturday back in work, so he had a full day- but when i got home I still had to bath her, and put her to bed- oh and make up her bottle coz he hadnt done it and he hadnt washed up any of her bowls n spoons- the porridge bowl was caked solid

when he works all day on weekdays, and i hav her all day i do the bath & bed of course, coz he's only just come in from work- and i'v washed up all the bowls throughout the day! i should expect the same when its the other way around shouldnt i! but when i said are u putting her 2 bed, he said "no, ur here now!" and played on his ps3 games! so i didnt even get a cup of tea or any food until 7.30 after millie had gone to bed!

men, grr! i wouldnt mind, if it wasnt that he tells everyone how easy it is and makes me look like a lazy moo, when he doesnt even do it all! and he doesnt get up in the nite for dummy-duty

sorry needed to get that off my chest lol

hope i didnt portray him really bad, he is great and he does help. but its just a tiny niggle! feel better now thanx for ur patience if u managed 2 read it all lol

 

[Princess_Puddles]

Your OH sounds like he has it easy if he's used to you doing it! My OH has never had a choice in the matter, Ive always made him do his fair share of everything. I worked 9am - 5:30pm (untill Friday just gone) and he leaves at 7am and doesn't get in untill 7pm but he gets up at 6am gets Harrison ready and puts him back in his cot & then when he gets in from work he gives Harrison a bath every night, Harrison feeds himself his milk and then OH will put him to bed. We share the cooking dinner, washing up and other chores!

He does these because he likes to have his fair share of time with Harrison during the week as I do. It sounds like I don't do anything but whilst i'm at work Harrison is at my Mums, so I have drop him there in the morning & I go back there at 1pm for my lunch and feed him his, change his bum and then back to work and on Tuesdays & Wednesdays I have to do all that and drop him off at nursery before 1:30pm.
Sorry for rambling on

Your OH will realise how hard it is when he has the Melissa more!

 

[rachie29]

Sounds like my OH too... usually pretty damn good but on occasion drives you crazy... mine does acknowledge the fact that its hard work lookng after baby and does do his fair share, my problem with him is that he still wants to maintain a similar level of social life to the one he had BH (before holly)....

Its starting to sink in that its not possible now though when I pass Holly to him at 7.30am after her first feed so i can go express!! He made a comment to my SIL the other day, he was going to the pub because it was a 'rare friday' HAH... he's been out every friday this month for one reason or another...

Dont worry, it will sink in with him eventually.... enjoy watching him struggle for a bit when it does, I have!

 

[SarahH]

Awww I so know how you feel, but at the same time it is my fault that my hubby is like that as I will be shattered but will still do all the running about and say no that I dont want any help - I know I am a fool!

Brian does help with everything... bar the nappies. I think he has changed 3 in Arianna's 20mths. The last time he did it he put the nappy on back-to-front - how he managed I have no idea!

The only other thing he wont do is at bathtime - he will bath arianna - but ask me to come through and clean her "lady-bits and bum" but thats just him thinking it is wrong for him to go there - I think that is why he doesnt do nappies

Maybe if we have a bot he will do all the nappies lol

 

[lfc_sarah]

Have a chat to him hun

My OH isnt going to get a choice when our son comes.
Hes going to share the responsibilities!
He said he wants to anyway.

And when your both at home you should definately share the chores

I havent had my baby yet, so i dont actually know how its going to be, but im hoping that we are going to share chores ect.

 

[trixipaws]

lol i forgot to say, he didnt give her any desserts after her meals coz i didnt leave any out (i left her lunch and dinner in little pots with instructions- and i made up some drinks before i left!)

and he put her pants on backwards

bless

 

[babsi]

My husband doesn't do anything in the morning before work as Kai normally gets up around 5 minutes before he goes.

But he does the bath every night, he doesn't spend much time with Kai so this is their time together. After bathtime we all read books together on the settee and then we both put Kai to bed and I normally stay in the room until Kai goes to sleep.

I guess everyone is different but my husband doesn't see it as work looking after Kai.

 

[trixipaws]

no mine doesnt either! he likes to do all the fun stuff- playing with her etc- but as soon as she cries he hands her to me and he wont do the "work" stuff (feeding, changing, bathing, putting to bed etc) unless she's in a giggley mood; thats the hard work in childcare IMO, when the baby is screaming. it WOULD be easy if they were in a happy, giggley mood all of the time- but they arent!

 

[mamichuli]

Hun, for me the mistake comes when the "wife" says that her OH "helps a lot". That isnt the point, IMO. He should be "sharing the responsability 50/50", not helping you.
On the other hand, you should really tell him how you feel when he says it is so easy - he probably isnt aware that it hurts you. He likely hasnt even thought about it!



Lisa

 

[amzhunny]

i hate it when they say this baby lark is easy!! I said to OH the other day that iw as trying to count the amount of times he has got up and done breakfast and i did it was about 2!!

Amber and OH went to his mums for the night a few weeks ago as i had a funeral in Liverpool and i had to write down all the instructions becuase i know that he doesnt know times/food/bottles etc - he does try hi best though.

You should speak to OH because he should be helping with the bathing and bedtimes especially if you have had a hard day at work yourself.

hope this sat is better for you xx

 

[lella]

My Oh is like that, he is a good dad and does help out quite a lot but I think he is under the impression i sit on my arse all day and this looking after the baby is easy. I think he forgets I have to cook clean, pick up after him. As well as bathing feeding and entertaining our LO.

I did laugh to myself , the number of posts ive read where we are leaving a list of instructions and food out , when we leave our LO's with them for the day. Up until recently my husband didnt even know where i kept the nappies or his clothes! (to be fair i do tend to catagorise all his clothes to different drawers)

 

[Hellokitty]

since i went back to work one of my working days is a saturday, and as he does normal weekdays he has melissa on saturdays. at first i was being graduated back into work on reduced hours, so only gone for the morning. the first time, i came home and he'd done all the washing up, cleaned the kitchen and he said "i dont kno what ur on about, its a piece of p*ss (childcare)- iv done this, that, and allsorts" etc etc etc, it almost felt like he was tryna make me look like a lazy bones who sits on her ass all day and exaggerates about how hard looking after a baby is.

OMG i know exactly what you mean!