Lowering abortion limits

[amethyst_echidna]

you have probably made her feel really bad about it.

I *do* feel really bad... maybe it's for good reason though? I'm so confused, I don't know what to do any more if this baby isn't my husband's.

AMETHYST

 

[poppy160]

71 say yes and 393 say no..

They won't reduce it to 12 weeks...

 

[fran_23]

you need to think hard and do what you think is best for you and your family- it is your body- your life and ultimately your decision!
whatever you and your husband choose to do is up to you and nobody has the right to judge you xx

 

[poppy160]

They aren't going to lower it to 16 weeks either..84 wanted to reduce it and 387 didn't.
They are now voting for it to be lowered to 20 weeks..which to me just doesn't seem fair. I know women have rights and things but so do babies..they didn't ask to be concieved, it's not fair for them to have life cruelly and painfully snatched away from them just because some people are careless with contraception!

 

[fran_23]

They aren't going to lower it to 16 weeks either..84 wanted to reduce it and 387 didn't.
They are now voting for it to be lowered to 20 weeks..which to me just doesn't seem fair. I know women have rights and things but so do babies..they didn't ask to be concieved, it's not fair for them to have life cruelly and painfully snatched away from them just because some people are careless with contraception!

dont forget what was said earlier about not being able to have an amnio till 16 weeks- there are medical reasons too and sometimes things don't show up until the full scan at 20 weeks.

 

[bunnymom1980]

I *do* feel really bad... maybe it's for good reason though? I'm so confused, I don't know what to do any more if this baby isn't my husband's.

AMETHYST

I know it's easier said than done but try not to worry too much until you've got the DNA results. Cross that bridge when you come to it is my philosophy

 

[poppy160]

They aren't going to lower it to 16 weeks either..84 wanted to reduce it and 387 didn't.
They are now voting for it to be lowered to 20 weeks..which to me just doesn't seem fair. I know women have rights and things but so do babies..they didn't ask to be concieved, it's not fair for them to have life cruelly and painfully snatched away from them just because some people are careless with contraception!

dont forget what was said earlier about not being able to have an amnio till 16 weeks- there are medical reasons too and sometimes things don't show up until the full scan at 20 weeks.

Obviously medical reasons are an entirely different thing..I'm just angry at the thought of perfectly healthy babies being aborted at such a late stage..surely 16 weeks (well, 10ish weeks by the time the woman finds out about the pregnancy) is enough time for a woman to decide weather she wants the baby or not?

 

[bunnymom1980]

Obviously medical reasons are an entirely different thing..I'm just angry at the thought of perfectly healthy babies being aborted at such a late stage..surely 16 weeks (well, 10ish weeks) is enough time for a woman to decide weather she wants the baby or not?

Some women find out really late though, it's not always a straight forward situation.

 

[poppy160]

Obviously medical reasons are an entirely different thing..I'm just angry at the thought of perfectly healthy babies being aborted at such a late stage..surely 16 weeks (well, 10ish weeks) is enough time for a woman to decide weather she wants the baby or not?

Some women find out really late though, it's not always a straight forward situation.

I guess you're right

 

[fran_23]

They aren't going to lower it to 16 weeks either..84 wanted to reduce it and 387 didn't.
They are now voting for it to be lowered to 20 weeks..which to me just doesn't seem fair. I know women have rights and things but so do babies..they didn't ask to be concieved, it's not fair for them to have life cruelly and painfully snatched away from them just because some people are careless with contraception!

dont forget what was said earlier about not being able to have an amnio till 16 weeks- there are medical reasons too and sometimes things don't show up until the full scan at 20 weeks.

Obviously medical reasons are an entirely different thing..I'm just angry at the thought of perfectly healthy babies being aborted at such a late stage..surely 16 weeks (well, 10ish weeks) is enough time for a woman to decide weather she wants the baby or not?

to be honest i know what you are saying i find the thought of it very hard myself but for instance..a good friend of mine was put on the injection as the pill doesnt work for her, the injection didn't either and she fell pregnant- she found out at 5 weeks and went to the doctor..anyway i dont know the full details but long and short of it she was made to go on a hospital waiting list as there was no marie stopes clinics or such like where she lived at the time and she was made to wait until she was 19 weeks- she found it extremely upsetting and traumatic as she felt the baby move and such like- but was really really not in a position to keep it. every case is not the same its never open and shut..i think that was awful and it was not her fault she would have never wanted it to get that far.

 

[poppy160]

[quote="fran_23":3ddoe20p]

They aren't going to lower it to 16 weeks either..84 wanted to reduce it and 387 didn't.
They are now voting for it to be lowered to 20 weeks..which to me just doesn't seem fair. I know women have rights and things but so do babies..they didn't ask to be concieved, it's not fair for them to have life cruelly and painfully snatched away from them just because some people are careless with contraception!

dont forget what was said earlier about not being able to have an amnio till 16 weeks- there are medical reasons too and sometimes things don't show up until the full scan at 20 weeks.

Obviously medical reasons are an entirely different thing..I'm just angry at the thought of perfectly healthy babies being aborted at such a late stage..surely 16 weeks (well, 10ish weeks) is enough time for a woman to decide weather she wants the baby or not?

to be honest i know what you are saying i find the thought of it very hard myself but for instance..a good friend of mine was put on the injection as the pill doesnt work for her, the injection didn't either and she fell pregnant- she found out at 5 weeks and went to the doctor..anyway i dont know the full details but long and short of it she was made to go on a hospital waiting list as there was no marie stopes clinics or such like where she lived at the time and she was made to wait until she was 19 weeks- she found it extremely upsetting and traumatic as she felt the baby move and such like- but was really really not in a position to keep it. every case is not the same its never open and shut..i think that was awful and it was not her fault she would have never wanted it to get that far.[/quote:3ddoe20p]

I guess this is why they are reluctant to reduce it. Some women don't find out until later on as bunnymom said and some have to go on waiting lists as you said.
It's such a sensitive subject and there is never going to be an answer that is going to suit everyone unfortunately.
They aren't going to change it..it's stayed the same.

 

[bunnymom1980]

24 weeks is staying!

I think the thing is aswell is that there is no new groundbreaking medical evidence that babies have a better chance of survival etc. Thats what they were asked to consider when voting.

 

[Suzie and Faith]

amethyst_echidna have some


As for the limit changing? Reducing it to something like 12 weeks would probably cause a drastic increase in 'back street' and DIY abortions...

I'm not saying whether they are right or wrong as I really don't know but I feel if the limit were lowered too far then it could cause other problems.

 

[Sandi4Paul]

I think the limit shuld be lower fro social reasons, 24 weeks is fine for me for medical reasons. but i come from a country where that is the law so i am used to the idea. It just seems unfair to the baby to be that far along and have your mum decide she doesn't want you cos it doesn't suit her lifestyle (again not alking medical reasons here which i feel are different)

I don't believe in abortion for me, if i had had to make that choice at some point in my life i don't know what i wuld have done. But i think that woman as a whole shuld have the choice as the alternatives are worse.

Sandi

 

[MissSara]

I know a girl where we live who had to pay to go privite at 24 weeks to abort her baby, all because she thought it was clever to be pregnant and had she left it and time went on she realised she couldn't go through with it.
It really really upsets me still to this day that she aborted her BABY at 24weeks, when i know from our 4d scan and feeling LO kick from 18weeks that he is a person now.
But she did this for social reasons!

me and OH discussed this before we tried for a baby and said what if we found out really really late on that something was wrong with our baby and tbh we couldn't have gone through with a termination but i totally understand people who can and for medical reasons really need to, thats why for medical reasons i think the limit should stay the same.

 

[sparky]

hmmm this one's a toughy.

On one hand i couldnt imagine having to go through an abortion at 24 weeks, it must be a horrific decision to make and i doubt one that anyone would take lightly.

I had a medical termination years ago and had to wait weeks and weeks for the NHS - eventually i paid over £400 myself so that the trauma could be over. So i can imagine that some of these decicisons are having to be made after a 20 week scan, which all of us know doesnt always happen as early as that!

Having been there, i still am 1000% pro-choice and am always a little unsettled by the pro-life arguments (most of which are based on relgion and very shakey medical fact) Also i finf it very hard when people say they could NEVER consider an abortion unless they have been in a situation where they've been faced with a horrible situation.

So i conclude that i trust the medical professionals to have the FACTs to hand.

As Zebrastripes said there are VERY few late abortions in the UK and the availablity of legal abortions is saving the life of young girls, i just feel grateful that we all have the right to choose in this country, that on one hand if we decidie not to go ahead with a pregnancy we can terminate, if we decide to proceed we have the welfare state to provide additional financial support if needed.

Either way women have the right to decide and i dont believe that any religious or moral teachings should come into it, apart from those of the individual.

 

[Krystal]

I think everyone has made some really good points. I guess from my point of view i'm thinking emotionally about the subject and just thinking of the baby. Which is still important but your all right in pointing out every case isn't just black and white. I do feel for anyone who has to go through it

 

[abcd1234]

My baby is the product of an affair, she is the other mans, i still love her and still want her, and the guy who was cheated loves her too and is there for us,and would be with me if i'd allow him to be (taking it slowly) so i dont agree with that tbh. However as stated in my above post, im not gonna have a go at anyone who does have an abortion, its just my personal view, and from reading your previous posts i know how much all this is affecting you

i think it was really unfair to say that- its not your desision or your life and just because her circumstances might sound similar to yours it doesnt give you the right to say that. sorry but i just think that was unkind even if you did dress it up afterwards with a hug and saying you understand- maybe if you disagree you should just say nothing because you have probably made her feel really bad about it..its not your life and doesnt affect you so what was the worth in picking like that?

This thread is about people opinions on it, and that is mine! The "dressing up" is actually me trying to convey that i do understand that it's not easy in this situation, i'll admit that the thought of abortion flashed through my mind when her dad left me and everything fell to pieces.

However i think your taking things way to personally! I was putting across MY view, it was not a personal attack on amathyst, i have posted many times in her threads stating that i do in fact understand that what shes going through isnt easy and if she does choose to abort then i wouldnt think less of her. However i persoanally wouldnt do it, and i think sometimes people look at what is right now and not how things will be eventually.

I also think we need to stop making this thread about amathyst, it's not fair, it was meant to be about the abortion limits, not about one members personal situation. Yes we all use our personal experience to shape our views but this was never about that.

 

[fran_23]

well she was putting HER opinion and you said "so i don't believe that to be honest" that is what i'm commenting on- i am not taking it personally i am commenting on what you wrote that i perceived to be nasty to another member on the forum. It wasn't against me so how can i be taking it personally? i just don't like seeing people upset others when it is not called for. I don't disagree on a lot of what you have said but its a strong emotive subject can you not just be a bit more careful of peoples feelings?

 

[abcd1234]

"so i don't believe that to be honest" quote]

Yeah MY view is that it's not a good enough reason to abort!

I have tried to stress in ALL my posts that my view applies to ME and MY baby/s and that what others wish to do is their own decision. However, im not about to pretend i agree with something when i dont.

However like i KEEP saying, this thread needs to move away from amathyst because it's not fair and i refuse to post anymore on it within here.

If its upset you then thats fine, if i've upset amathyst then i appologise, however i have PM'd her because i dont like the way this thread has moved on to her.