Letting them cry?

[Beth&Archer]

I attempted to let Archer cry (after feeding, nappy change and temperature check of course) in the very early days but soon realised that it was a far more relaxed atmosphere if I just picked him up when he was crying. I also felt that when he was very tiny he coulnd't possibly understand the cry it out technique.

He's now nearly 9 weeks and when he's awake he wants to be held by me all the time. He is in pain alot (colic) and most of the time I can tell when he's in pain, but I think sometimes he just wants attention.

I don't know what to do as he gets himself into such a state if I don't pick him up but surely holding him will just encourage him to be even more attention seeking? Even when he's in his dad's arms he will look me in the eye and cry as if to say "look mummy, I'm crying, hold me!".

Is he too young for me to try and let him cry? I can't help but think its a bit cruel but I honestly don't know what else to do. It breaks my heart to see him so upset but I am worried that if this continues we'll have a very clingy little boy on our hands.

Any advice please?

 

[Nicky_Jones]

9 weeks is still very young. Ellie suffered from colic as well and I know how hard it is

Once the colic passed at abut 3 months, shr has been a different baby. She goes down quiteky for naps, she is happy to sit fir a while in her chair while we both wat (at the same time ), or do jobs etc. Just give her the hugs she needs now.

 

[Londoner Claire]

I would comfort him as he has Colic but not talk to him so he realises that it's sleep and not up time. That's what I was told to do and it helped. Also boys left to cry can apparently suffer from hernia.

 

[skatty]

I believe that if babies are responded to when they cry they become more indepenedant. I never let Leorah cry without responding and she is already able to play on her mat on her own, (our babies are the same age ), she sometimes gives a little squeal if she can't see me but I just say I'm over here and she's fine. My LO also looks over to me when her dad is holding her and if she's upset calms down better with me but we are the Mummies

Leorah has also had a lot of colicky behaviour and I am doing the Dr Sears elimination diet. I saw immediate improvement though today she had a couple of crying spells but this is normal apparantly. I am pretty sure she has a milk protein sensitivity. I have been having a very limited diet since Monday with absolutely no dairy products, soy or additives and I swear its like having a new baby and something I'd recommend any mum of a colicky baby to look into. That's if you are breastfeeding obviously!

 

[Londoner Claire]

I used to cuddle Ryan back to sleep and always comfort him and he still won't go to bed without me without crying or sneaking into my bed and he's 7.

 

[nathanmum]

i think it may be a bit too young but im a right pushover!

 

[Alfiesmummy]

if its just a wingey cry instead of picking LO up straight away try talking to them and soothing them, sorry if this is stationg the obvious but if bubs is in distress screaming then thats the time to pick them up, Alfie got very wise to it quickly that if he cried mummy would pick him up, now i go over, play with him a little or take off his nappy (typical bloke likes his winkle out ) but i would never let him scream, also if he was in pain then id give him a cuddle, it goes a long way

 

[Melly+2]

if it sounds like he is in pain or a constant cry thren i wud pick him up but if he cries for a couple of mins and stops even for a few secs then try putting him to bed and rubbing his tummy for a bit. hope was like this crying to be picked up but this has worked well for us x

 

[budge]

I attempted to let Archer cry (after feeding, nappy change and temperature check of course) in the very early days but soon realised that it was a far more relaxed atmosphere if I just picked him up when he was crying. I also felt that when he was very tiny he coulnd't possibly understand the cry it out technique.

He's now nearly 9 weeks and when he's awake he wants to be held by me all the time. He is in pain alot (colic) and most of the time I can tell when he's in pain, but I think sometimes he just wants attention.

I don't know what to do as he gets himself into such a state if I don't pick him up but surely holding him will just encourage him to be even more attention seeking? Even when he's in his dad's arms he will look me in the eye and cry as if to say "look mummy, I'm crying, hold me!".

Is he too young for me to try and let him cry? I can't help but think its a bit cruel but I honestly don't know what else to do. It breaks my heart to see him so upset but I am worried that if this continues we'll have a very clingy little boy on our hands.

Any advice please?

no don't let him cry. He needs a cuddle and feeling close to you if he is in pain which i think he may be.
Try this
hold him around his tummy with his back to your tummy and walk around. The tightness around the tummy if he has tummy ache relieves it.

 

[Beth&Archer]

Thanks Budge that does seem to help a bit and also he has done a few farts like that which is what I think is casuing all the pain

 

[Beth&Archer]

(typical bloke likes his winkle out )

LOL yep he loves it too, but can't be trusted!! He does a wee everytime my back is turned!!!

if it sounds like he is in pain or a constant cry thren i wud pick him up but if he cries for a couple of mins and stops even for a few secs then try putting him to bed and rubbing his tummy for a bit. hope was like this crying to be picked up but this has worked well for us x

Thanks littlelady, I am now much better at realising when he's in pain and when he's just grizzling and the tummy rubbing does seem to work. I think alot of the time he just needs to know that we're there and tummy rubbing is great at night when talking to him would wake him up too much.

 

[Nicky_Jones]

Something we were told by our health visitor which really helped was to fold his legs up towards his chest and hold for 6 seconds release and then repeat a few times. That helped releave the stomach pains.

 

[Londoner Claire]

Something we were told by our health visitor which really helped was to fold his legs up towards his chest and hold for 6 seconds release and then repeat a few times. That helped releave the stomach pains.

That's really handy to know. Ryan used to pull them up himself, it was horrid. I feel awful for any baby with colic.

 

[Melly+2]

the thing you have got to remember is that babies with colic are not suffering because of you, your coping really well and your giving your baby so much love and that is great x