IVF - sperm collection

[Bambi42]

Hi ladies,
A question for those of you who have gone through IVF. We start on Monday and I bought a ‘survival guide’ book written with his / her points of view to help us know what to expect. (It’s good)
It’s a very honest tale and on their first attempt at IVF they had an issue on egg collection day because basically the husband felt under too much pressure and was unable to provide a sperm sample. Apparently it’s quite a common issue. (The solution is to freeze a sperm sample in advance so it can be used as a back up if need be)

My question is were you told about this by your clinic? And how did you bring it up with your man? I don’t want to plant the seed of worry in his head but I also don’t want to not say anything because what a nightmare that would be having got as far as egg collection - emotionally & financially. His initial sample was done at home & dropped off.

Any thoughts? Xx

 

[Bambi42]

 

[Jezby]

Hey there,

I don’t think it needs bringing up... when he realises he has to produce a sample on the same day it’ll click.

You get an absolute tonne of paper work with the ivf you have to read & sign together and it takes you through everything so it should be become clear at this point what he has to do and when and you’lk be having several appointments together too.

By the time we had gotten to egg collection hubby had been in 3 x’s to what we now joke as being “the wank room”
Of course he was very nervous the 1st time but it had a tv with a prob dvd and some magazine, it’s very discrete and obv a locaable door.

We joked afterwards of this was a gender swap situation - us ladies would need more than a dvd! We’d need 3 hrs a plot line , some bubbly, mood lighting lol

We’ve been very very honest with each other about the whole process and I think it’s reslly helped combat the more more intimate side of things. ...

Good luck xx

 

[Bambi42]

We’ve done all the paperwork and answered all the weird questions.
My OH did the original test last year after my miscarriage and as far as we know the next time is on egg day.
I might ask the nurse if it’s at home or in the clinic? I think he’ll be fine if it’s home.

 

[Bambi42]

@Jezby
And you’re totally right about the honesty and the joking. All the legs in stirrups & plastic pots sure takes the romance out of life xx

 

[Jezby]

It has to be in the clinic ... my OH is taken off just before I go in for egg collection 1st time is gone when he returned and the 2nd time I was still there.

I think a lot of it is in the timing, they want the freshest sample possible

You might trying to do it at home before you go in for egg collection is actually more stressful ... be intesting to see what your clinic says.

When do you you start your IVF? xx

 

[Bambi42]

It has to be in the clinic ... my OH is taken off just before I go in for egg collection 1st time is gone when he returned and the 2nd time I was still there.

I think a lot of it is in the timing, they want the freshest sample possible

You might trying to do it at home before you go in for egg collection is actually more stressful ... be intesting to see what your clinic says.

When do you you start your IVF? xx

We start on Monday - Day 21 of my cycle with a Prostap injection. This seems to be different to what my friends who have had IVF had but they had it years ago in the early 30’s and I’m 42. Feeling quite calm at the moment, might be a different story on Monday when the emotions & reality kicks in.

Where are you - in the 2WW? Xx

 

[katie88]

H bambi, I'm with jezby, with my husband it just clicked and we joked about it. We never really talked about it first round my hubs went off before my collection and by the time I was called he wasn't back. Second time he was back from producing his sample before I went to collection. I'm sure your doc will make him aware that he needs to produce a sample on the day, our nurses kept repeating it just in case lol I kept winding my hubs up saying I hope it was decent material lol

 

[Bambi42]

My worry is the guy in the book couldn’t do it on the day because he felt under pressure, and apparently that’s a common issue. Their IVF failed because the sample was sooooo late - the next day.
My OH knows he has to do it and says ‘no big deal’ but now I have a nagging worry because sometimes in general life scenarios he’s not great under pressure, other times he’s fine.
I think i’ll speak to the nurses when he’s not around and ask how common it is and if they offer the freezing sperm option. We can only afford one shot at this so I’m trying to hedge our bets.
Hope you’re doing okay girls, it’s a rollercoaster.
Hug x

 

[katie88]

Hi bambi,

Try not to stress too much. It's a whole stressful time all round so I understand thats easier said that done.

Yes maybe have a word with your nurse when you go but just don't mention it to your hubs again and just leave him to it. If he thinks your confident in his ability then maybe it will keep him calm to.