Is it realistic to leave a 2-3 week old baby for a few hours with my MIL?

[i.love]

Girls, I need some advice. It's not such a big problem, but I can't decide one way or the other, and it is driving me mad!

Basically I need to decide if I am going to go to my graduation ceremony. It is on 21 Nov, and I am due on 1 Nov... As this is my first baby, I understand that it is rather likely that I will be a bit late. Plus I do believe that my date is 1 week ahead, so I think I am really due about 7 Nov.

Anyway, I need to decide now if I am going to go, and need to order tickets, gown and photographs (more than 100 pounds all together!).

If I do go, I'll need to leave my very young baby with my MIL for 3-4 hours. Does it sound completely crazy? Or is it ok to do this? I don't have much experience with babies, so I really have no idea

Any opinions will be very much appreciated

 

[lesleyann23]

Might be hard if your Bf but if you can go for it baby won't mind and will be proud of mummys graduation pics x

 

[Jaxx01]

I hate to put a spanner in the works but what if you do go overdue and they start inducing you at 41-42 potentially baby could only be a week old?? you may not feel like leaving baby when it's that young but then again you might?? sorry thats not really much help lol x

 

[l_maclean]

Im not a huge expert - but in theory shouldnt it be easier on baby if its younger - chances are they'll sleep most of the time your away??

xxx

 

[munchkin1982]

It is a hard one hunni however have a good think about how the day will be working out.

If it is anything like my graduation ceromony then the actually "ceromony" was only about 45 mins (if I remember correctly. The time before that and after was for photographs etc with friends and family. You may not be able to get tickets for all friends/family you want there but they could still be there *waiting in the background" so to speak so you wouldn't actually be away for too long.

Also, as LesleyAnn has already pointed out... baby won't mind, will enjoy time with "Nanny" and will be proud of Mummy's Graduation Pics etc....

Oh and also, if you have a nice "chilled out baby" then they may end up sleeping all the time you are "away" from them anyway! you never know!! xxx

 

[CustardCream]

Can I be honest? I think its a really bad idea, its your newborn baby... whats more important? Baby might be sleeping but so early into being born its wrong. Sorry but thats my opnion

 

[AugustMum]

Its possible. You can usually take babes in arms in ceremonies (or at least at mine you can) so it would literally just be the ceremony that you'd have to leave them. BUT! If your like me, I went 15 days over and was in hospital for a further 2 days after so you may have only been home a day or 2 and if you have a section, its going to be painful.

If you can spare the money, get it all sorted and then decide closer to the time. You might be a week early with a straight forward labour and your LO would be almost a month old.

If you can spare the money for something thats uncertain though, Id probably say give it a miss.

 

[star fish]

Why cant the baby go with you? You must have at least one friend or family member accompanying you? Who could hold the baby during the service and hand it back if needed before and after? At my graduation I had to limit family members who were attending but my grandparents etc were waiting in the pub just round the corner to join me as soon as it was done.

 

[Sarah13]

My graduation ceremony lasted about an hour, it was all the photos and waiting etc that took the time so maybe your mil could come along then with baby? It could all depend on how your birth goes too, if you end up with a c section say 2 weeks after your due date, you won't want to go, on other hand if baby's a week early it could be a month old by then! It is difficult but I'd say just book tickets and go with the flow, i know you could lose £100 but there's more chance you will be ok to go than not and you can express a few bottles if your breast feeding for while your away.

 

[i.love]

thanks girls for your opinions, they all help!

I don't think I would be comfortable to take such a young baby into the city, with the flu season approaching etc... And all the people wanting to touch him... I just feel that it would be too early. So realistically we would need to drive the lil one to my mil, then go to the graduation (about 1 hour drive), then drive back to pick him up...

Good point that I might also stay in the hospital for a few days, I didn't think about that!

Can babies really sleep for 4 hours without feed at that stage? I thought they need feeding every 2 hours or so when they are so young...

 

[i.love]

CustardCream thanks hun honest opinions are exactly what I need

 

[jodied]

I think it really all depends on how you plan to feed. If bf I don't think you would be able to leave baby for that long at that stage as they will get hungry. If bottle feeding then it should be fine. Im still bf and if it had been me I would have gone to the ceremony but had someone just round the corner with baby so that I was nearby to feed as would be ok for duration of service xx

 

[Geminiblue]

it would have been over my dead body that I left my child at that age...I thought I would be able to leave him with grandparents, have a nights rest after the birth ................ NOPE, Id rather have removed my skin with a potato peeler. Nobody can plan for that emotion babe...its a personal choice but I just couldnt and wouldnt have done it...its very early. My sister said her graduation went on ages, you werent allowed to leave until everyone had been clapped through xxx

 

[OzGirlNat]

I can't really help with the leaving the baby part but from a professional point of view, could you either defer you attendance to a later ceremony or take the baby with you? I'm sure if you let the graduation team know that you will have just have had a baby, they'll be able to make special arrangements for you (we do it all the time). We try to be as accommodating as possible to any new mums so we can make arrangements to either come in to the hall late or move seats once you've been presented so you can comfort/feed the baby if you need to. We're also more than happy to defer attendance to another ceremony. Does your Uni have other ceremonies during the year you could perhaps attend instead?

 

[littlemiss83]

Personally if it was me, i'd go. You might end up regretting it if you dont, you worked hard & you deserve it. As long as baby is born ok & is healthy there is no reason why you cant leave them, even if it is for 3/4 hours.

 

[star fish]

I think ozgirl's idea is genius! Defer to a different ceremony! Go to one that is 6 months or even a year later. That way you still get your cap and gown photo, but it doesnt clash with your very important other event.

BTW, huge congrats on your graduation x

 

[Esoames]

Why doesn't mil have a walk around; sit in a cafe and then you meet up after?

 

[suzzi]

i say a big yes its fine!!! if you trust MIL and she is good with babies why not, when i had my first my OH took me out for the day for lunch and a relaxing day to recharge batteries and my mum had ds and he was only 2 weeks old, he was fed changed and slept!! think my mum was a bit bored as he didnt need much attention just slept!

 

[jomc]

I'd say its fine.... its whatever you are comfortable with and everyone will be different. Some people couldn't entertain the idea of leaving their LO whereas for some it wont bother them in the slightest.. as long as its well looked after

My mum is a child minder and has been minding kids for the same couple for 17 years. When the middle child was born, the mothers sister was getting married 3 days later: my mum had the baby for the whole day and the night ( the mum did drop in a few times as the wedding was only up the road).

So its completely up to you hun xxxx

 

[i.love]

I can't really help with the leaving the baby part but from a professional point of view, could you either defer you attendance to a later ceremony or take the baby with you? I'm sure if you let the graduation team know that you will have just have had a baby, they'll be able to make special arrangements for you (we do it all the time). We try to be as accommodating as possible to any new mums so we can make arrangements to either come in to the hall late or move seats once you've been presented so you can comfort/feed the baby if you need to. We're also more than happy to defer attendance to another ceremony. Does your Uni have other ceremonies during the year you could perhaps attend instead?

that's a very interesting idea, thanks!

I don't think I would want to go to another ceremony as it would mean that there would be no one else from my course... I don't care for the photo that much treally

I'll think about coming in later/moving seats option though, thx!