I'm scared of being alone

Discussion in 'Relationships' started by Snuggle, Jan 19, 2008.

  1. Snuggle

    Snuggle Well-Known Member

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    Those of you who have read my other post will know that hubby and I separated recently. I'm coping well but with it just being me and Maddison in the house, I'm feeling very alone :( I'm trying to keep myself busy but whenever I sit down I start to think about things and think to myself that this is how its going to be for a very long time now...just me and Maddison sitting alone night after night. Chris has said he will have Maddison as much as I will allow him so that I can have my own time and go out with friends. Only problem is, I have no friends to go out with :( My colleagues are male and my best friend is moving away.
    I'm not looking for answers to this, just wanted to have a moan :(

    :hug: :hug:
     
  2. Geordie&Bairn

    Geordie&Bairn Well-Known Member

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    ah Hon
    I sort of know how you feel
    When i moved down south 4 years ago i knew no one
    So i started looking for clubs to join i started water aerobic dance classes and Martial Arts i made someme brill friens through Martial arts and we go out together on nights out and shopping.
    Its abit diffrent with a wee one in tow
    do you have any family to look after your baby whils you go out for a few hours?
    Mabye find out out about mother baby clubs
    You'll meet like minded people in the same boat
    I know of a few down hear they pool there babysitting contacts together and share sitters. They also babysit for each other so they can go out.
    It a great way of having sometime to yourself getting out for a while.
    And it shouldnt cost the earth either.
    You'll make friends witht the local mums
     
  3. Tillytots

    Tillytots Well-Known Member

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    hey hun :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:

    I just wanted to send you hugs and theres never been a truer saying than 'you never know whats just around the corner' try and keep positive, I know it must be incredibly hard right now but you wont be alone forever if that isnt what you want :) before your friend moves away maybe try and go out as much as possible. You never know who you'll meet and even if your colleagues are male - thats ok. Majority of my friends are male...they wont let you be down for a second!!

    xxxx
     
  4. andreaaa

    andreaaa Well-Known Member

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    I know how you feel, I found it very hard when I split from my ex husband and was left alone with Callum (he was 4) and Caitlin (she was 1).

    I spent a lot of nights when they were in bed (they always go at 7) on the internet (i think it's a bloody godsend tbh). They have always stayed with their Dad every other weekend but I didn't really know what to do.

    So I tried something new - I passed my bike test, I made tons of great friends who I also started going out with socially and I had new goals to focus on.

    2 years later I met my now DH who I met through a Bike Chat Forum and would never have met if I hadn't gotten into bikes. Within a few months we had moved in together and obviously now are expecting a baby.

    So think about what YOU want to do... a new hobby and I promise you that things will get better and one day you'll be happier than you ever believed possible.

    xx :hug: xx
     
  5. mrs_tommo22

    mrs_tommo22 Well-Known Member

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    If I can ever get up your way Snuggle Im taking ou out minus children for a drink and were going to get very tiddly and have a man hating evening and I would say buy a book on confidense - it has done me the world of good.
     
  6. Nic'n'Keeley

    Nic'n'Keeley Well-Known Member

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    Hiya hun, I have been a single mum since Keeley was 3months old. and i know how lonely it is at times.. why not try to take up a hobby... it does get easier btw right now its still a new split and your still upset.

    Once Maddison is in bed come on here or go on msn and chat to me :) I'm here if you ever need to talk :hug:

    Also are you a member of netmums? you can meet other mums in your area :)
     
  7. Snuggle

    Snuggle Well-Known Member

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    Thank you girls :hug: :hug:

    Chris has been here most of today packing and trying to get house ready for selling. He left about 15 mins ago and all I've did is cry. I'm just finding it so hard on my own :(
    I know its early days and in time things will get easier and when I move I think I will take the advice given here and take up a hobby to meet new friends :D
    I've never met anyone from this forum in my life but I dont know what I would do without you all :hug: :hug: :hug:
     
  8. trixipaws

    trixipaws Well-Known Member

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    aww, im sorry 2 hear this snuggle :hug:

    thats why i'd hav moved back home if i were in ur situation. but if u think u can cope then im sure things will be fine :hug:

    i can only imagine how it must feel, iv never had an 'adult' break-up. hope u find a nice hobby u enjoy and meet some nice friends. :hug:
     
  9. Nic'n'Keeley

    Nic'n'Keeley Well-Known Member

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    I disagree with that... when my ex left we were living at my mums and i chose to move out soon after he left... and it was the best thing i ever did :D if i had stayed i would of relied on my parents too much and not got used to it being just me and keeley... i hated it at first now i wouldn't have it any other way

    But everyone is different :hug:
     
  10. lauramumof2

    lauramumof2 Well-Known Member

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    you will get stronger, its too soon to feel anything other than hurt. :hug:
     
  11. bagpuss

    bagpuss Well-Known Member

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    :hug: :hug: I can relate to this hun,I am going through the same at the mo.I feel lonely too,its an awful feeling.But the support on here is amazing,it keeps me sane!I just want to give you loads of these :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:
     
  12. EllieG

    EllieG Well-Known Member

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    I can't imagine what it must be like for you, but echo what the others have said about this forum. I think you are very brave, many people would stay together 'for the sake of the kids', personally i think thats the worst thing anyone could do.
    I know it's not everyones cup of tea, but have you heard of gingerbread? i believe they run support groups for lone parents http://www.gingerbread.org.uk/.
    Good luck :hug:
     
  13. Redshoes

    Redshoes Well-Known Member

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    All I know is I have a friend who did the opposite to you Snuggle, she stayed in a loveless, unhappy relationship, and now she is upset and depressed daily. She sees no light, she sees no happy future. You on the other hand have been so strong, you've done what's right for you which is making you sad, but you know long term it will make you so happy, which is so important for your lovely Maddison. I think you're amazing, being civil, talking about how you're feeling, seeing what you can do to help yourself. You will be just fine :) :hug: :hug: :hug: Its true there may be low times, but you did this to make a short low time, and a happy future, otherwise you'd have stayed together, so well done you and take your time, if you ever feel alone there is always PF, and there is always someone here who will stand by you when you feel alone, and they will hold your hand when times feel too hard.

    Take care of yourself, spoil yourself, sending very best wishes :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:
     
  14. clairescunny55

    clairescunny55 Well-Known Member

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    hi Hun sorry to hear you're feeling like this. Where in Lincolnshire are you, if you're not too far away we could meet up for a drink or something x :hug:
     
  15. Babylicious

    Babylicious Well-Known Member

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  16. Snuggle

    Snuggle Well-Known Member

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    Aw thank you, thats really sweet of you. Think I'm quite far away from you though, I'm near Grantham which is 20 mins north of Peterborough :hug:
     
  17. clairescunny55

    clairescunny55 Well-Known Member

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    i just went on aa route planner, it about 1hr 30 mins drive :( :hug:
     
  18. Snuggle

    Snuggle Well-Known Member

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    Yeah thought it was quite far, thank you though hunny, at least I have all of you on here :hug: :hug: :hug:
     
  19. MissGobby

    MissGobby Well-Known Member

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    awww hunny :( you will get through this, dont forget its not long since you split up so its going to be hard - probably will be for a while but you will get through it and come out the other side much stronger hunny!! dont forget you have all us here too :D :hug:
     
  20. babyroo

    babyroo Well-Known Member

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