If all else fails??

[Vickyxx]

Last week I was out celebrating my birthday when one of my closest friends who I have known for about 18 years and is like a sister to me pulled me to one side and said she wanted to tell me something, she knows all about our infertility problems and how hard it has been for me.

She told me that being a mother was the most amazing feeling in the world, a feeling that would break her heart if I was to miss out on, and that if all else fails and we have no where else to turn then she would be a surrogate for me and my husband!!

I was literally stunned I mean what do you say to something like that, I know that she meant it as I know her and she would never say something like that otherwise.

She said that is of course if my sister doesnt offer, but otherwise she will be there for me.

I know it is still early days in terms of my treatment but I always have it in the back of my mind what if none of it works, but I have never until now considered what we would do.

I hope no one finds this thread upsetting as its really not meant that way, I am just curious to know if I am the only one thinking so far ahead??

 

[dita_parlo]

Hi hunny, you're definitely not alone in thinking this far ahead. My sister knows all about the troubles we're having with the miscarriages and chemicals, and she told me that she would be a surrogate for us. This was totally shocking to me because she had a horrendous 48 hour labour with emergency c section and blood transfusion and has swore she will never had kids again, but to think she would do that for us is amazing.

I think that you have an absolutely gem of a friend, what a wonderful woman she must be. I know it's hard to think so far in the future but it's also nice to consider all options and to have that hope that we will be mothers one day, I'm sure of it! xxx

 

[Kerrieanne]

OMG this is so nice of your friend to do this, to offer such an amazing gift. My friend said the same a while ago but i told her it is a big decision and to re-access the situation in a few years. I always had it in the back of my mind that considering hubby and i are both healthy we would eventually have a baby of our own however, sarrogacy was always at the back of my mind.

For me it felt like she was throwing me a hook and i just needed to hold on a little bit more, gave me hope.

I'm sure you will sometime soon be shouting your BFP from the roof tops and you can just continue to be forever thankful to your friend for the amazing offer xx

All the luck in the world to you hun xx

 

[Vickyxx]

Thanks girls, it is nice to know that I am not the only one thinking about these things.

I still have a great deal of faith that we will get our own BFP in due time modern medicine is so amazing and they can do so much.

I agree with you Kerrieanne it did give me more hope and knowing that now will help me when/if things get really tough xx

 

[LouiseB]

I think that it's really sweet of your friend to suggest that Vicky

I have thought about it myself from both sides.

I have wondered who i would ask to be my surrogate, but i figured i'd go for a stranger who i'd arm twist into living with us so i could keep my beady eye on her

I also decided that if me and hubby couldn't have our own biological children that i would offer to be a surrogate so that i could still experience pregnancy and things

Hubby wasn't even keen on that idea, but it's not really his decision imo

 

[positivity :)]

that is so lovely of ur friend vicky, what an amazing offer! i used to have it in my head. my step sister has 3 kids and is baby mad, she used to get more upset than me when i didn't get preggers and i always kind of knew that if i asked her, she would do it for me.

ur not going to need that though, i really think u will get there

xx

 

[Nurse 26]

aww what a great friend you have there vicky, to be honest ive not thought about itthink prob adoption would be the route we would go down but we never really discussed it yet.

xx

 

[Esperanza84]

That's so sweet of your friend Vicky!

We've decided that if we can't have our own children (biological children) than we will "buy some". That is, adopt some. It's very expensive to adopt children (at least here in Norway) but we want a family. In the end, it doesn't really matter if it's our blood and flesh or someone else's, just that we're a family! I don't think a lot about it, but I know, that some day, in the future, we will have a family Atm we have two cats

 

[maybe baby]

Aww it's really nice of your friend to offer such a gift, I think I would offer it to my friends/family if they needed me to.

My SIL has offered the same to me if I need her to as well.

I don't think it will come to it for you Hun, I see your BFP just around the corner!

How are you feeling on the double dose? When's your scan?

xx

 

[Vickyxx]

I think its just nice to know that we all have people in our lives that love us so much that they would do something like that.

Maybe, the increase hadn't been to bad so far now I know what side effects to expect they don't come as such a shock. Got my scan tomorrow I will let you know if I have any eggs cooking .... Fingers crossed xxx

 

[Lulabell]

Such a sweet and amazing offer from your friend. My sister offered the same. But in all honesty it made me feel sad. To watch someone else go through what I'd been longing for would of been hard. I have pcos but thankfully metformin did wonders. Fingers x for you for your own bfp soon!xx

 

[maybe baby]

Ooohh good luck Hun!

Sending you egg dust!



xx

 

[LouiseB]

Good luck the the scan tomorrow Vicky

 

[positivity :)]

good luck tomorrow xxxxxxxxxxx

 

[Vickyxx]

You guys really are awesome ...... Big love coming your way

 

[Bead]

What a wonderful friend it's heartwarming to hear xxx