I went to see my doctor and have advice for you all!

[clem]

Hi, some of you know of my fear of us not being able to have children at all (not because I have any reason to think so at all except that we've been trying for quite a while). Anyway, I thought we should get our fertility checked out and so I decided to make an appointment for me at least, with a specialist at my practice.

Firstly I said we had been trying 'properly' for 18 months. The doctor said they wouldn't even consider refering me for checks until it's been 2 years. (Though of course we could go private).

The next thing she asked is how often we have sex. I said every 48 hrs whilst I am ovulating; and she said "Well no wonder you are not pregnant! That's not going to do it."

As you can imagine I was v confused and said that I used the ovulation testing kits and did she think we should be doing it every day or 6 times a day or what?

She said No. Once every 48 hours is just right. EXCEPT I should be doing it once every 48 hrs for the entire month. And to throw all the ov testing kits in the bin! She said every woman's ovulation is different, most of them get pregnant when they dont think they are ovulating, it can be really early or really late and the 'symptoms' are totally unreliable. Also that every 48 hrs for the whole month was the only way to ensure there was 'enough' at the right moment.

Well I didnt know what to think! I think my 'symptoms' are pretty reliable. I can feel the 'egg white' appear on the exact day it's in my diary to do so. I feel my temperature change. I recognise the cramping on alternate sides each month. I was sceptical. Then I asked my best friend when in the month she concieved and it was no where near when she thought she was ovulating!

Well......... this information may be no use. I, personally dont see it will help me as my husband and I barely find time to fit in sex when i am ovulating let alone during the rest of the month (the once every 48hrs that i told my doctor was totally untrue) and when I told my husband he said "Oh god, more pressure, I'm can't do anymore! I work too hard!" Which wasnt great.

But on a cheerful note, she didnt seem to think it unusual at all that we had been unsucessfully trying for 18 months, which was kind of a relief.

Hope that helps in some way for the rest of you all anyway x

 

[Sam's Mum]

Fingers crossed it makes a difference for you

 

[mdsremos]

Every 48 hours does seem extreme though. All 3 times we gave fallen pregnant we have gone roughly by the ovulation dates for that week and tried just before, during and after ov that week and luckily for us we were successful each time although I had an early scan and we were told that I probably ov'd later than though as date as a week behind but didn't think sperm could last so long? Try not to make it a chore and enjoy as my dh felt pressured to perform too. Good luck *crosses fingers*

 

[flopsybunny]

when I told my husband he said "Oh god, more pressure, I'm can't do anymore! I work too hard!" Which wasnt great.

LOL Isn't that typical of men. When sex isn't on offer they want it all the time but when it is they don't!

Good luck xx

 

[BUGGY82]

Wow that's a lot of bding!!! I though u only had to be trying 12 months before they referred u to have tests, waiting 2 years seems so long!
I'm only into my 7th cycle so know where near as long as you but I will be demanding a referal as soon as I get to 12 month, the pressure is horrible & to have that uncertainty just adds to the stress.

Wishing you lots of luck x

 

[JJ Mum]

I'm the same , the four times I have been pregnant have been following the general rule of ovulation on day 14 , and has worked for me, Took much longer winth one child , but we never did it outside of the lucky window, as my OH has performance pressure issues too bless him.

Every 48 hrs for the whole month would give you a good nchance and cover all bases, but I personally couldn't get oh to do this. There must be something pretty proven scientifically with ovulation testing or they wouldn't be able to sell them?

Go with what feels good for you , you know your body and can see its changes over the cycle

 

[MrsR]

I concieved no where near to when I thought I was ovulating (no opk's over here though) and I had also heard every 48 hours for conception! x x We only bd 3-4 times that whole month I concieved as we weren't trying/weren't preventing x x good luck all you ttc!!!

 

[flopsybunny]

Me too Buggy, I am in my 6th month of trying. I really don't want to reach 12 months. The thought of another 6 months of raised hopes and frustrations and upset is horrible.

Do you think that bding so much would deplete sperm stocks? Or do they make them as quick as they use them? LOL I've never really thought much about that.

xx

 

[xXxBonnyxXx]

Now this sort of thing is what makes me really worried as me and hubby do bd every other day for the whole month!!! Not because we have to but just because we like it!

So far since Tuesday we have been going for every day! Might let him have a rest tonight but I have such a high sex drive that I would like it every night - once at least!!!!

 

[serenitylove]

my lucky month i did ov test but spent 3 days befor and 4 days after so everyday basically

 

[WILMAFLINSTONE]

Hmmmm interesting! Well we BD few days approaching Ov every day first month, every other day second month everyday third month and got preg which ended in MC...so now once AF leaves we were planning on BD every day if we could although I know this wont happen as once I Ov I go right off sex and cant even bring myself to think about it never mind do it...god you hear so many sotries of wahts best you dont know what to do for the best! lol xxx

 

[x_larlybelle_x]

i suggested in every 48 hours to my dh and the answer i got was "i'm up for that"! lol! gonna give that a go this month once the has gone

 

[sparkle82]

Do you have the option 2 c another doc??? Maybe one that could be a little more sympathetic & refer you sooner? I think it's disgusting for them to make you wait that long. I've been refered after telling my doc I've been trying for nearly a year, he didn't even ask exactly how long, altho I've also missed my last 3 periods so have had a hospital appointment to look into both. So maybe wouldve made me wait longer if that wasn't the case?? Checking dh out aswell though. Hope you can get some joy from someone, waiting is the worst!!! I know I've been waiting for af since feb!!! Lol.

Good luck Hun xxx

 

[clem]

Hiya, yes the doctor was certainly annoying but she is supposed to the specialist on family planning at the surgery (and it's a big surgery in the 'finest' part of town, lol). Maybe she wants us to pay to go private!

Good luck to those of you who are going to attempt every 48 hrs! I shall try to convince hubby (there is nothing stopping me from being up for it )

I hope those of you who get BFP this month could tell us how often you did it???

 

[x_larlybelle_x]

tonight is the 2nd night of the 48 hour rule n dh cant wait to lol bless him!

 

[BabyLover]

Well we have been TTC for 4 years now and nothing, which when reading this has made me laugh...because we have tried everything, you name it we have done it, one month we was having sex nearly everyday of the month, probably 2 days off before AF was due and didn't have any luck, I am coming to think wether we have something wrong with us, even though we have been doctors once and there was nothing wrong with us lol

I know how you feel, so the best advice I can give you is to continue having sex as normal and continue to go doctors for fertility treatment if neccessary...

All the luck in the world for you, I know how heartbreaking it is

Donna xx

 

[flopsybunny]

Fingers crossed you get your well earned bfp soon Donna!

xx