I feel miserable

[lisey]

I am not coping too well today, I feel like a zombie on auto-pilot. I don't want to talk to people, look at them or pretend to be happy.
I should be planning for my babys arrival as would have been due on the 14th, instead I am going through life wishing away the days, in a job I hate, with people I can't stand with a constant worry of future miscarriages.
I can't snap out of it today, I can feel that I need a good cry but its not happening yet, I am sure something will trigger it eventually.

Its a pointless post but I just had to get it out of my head and written down. Nobody around me gets it, I don't even think my OH does but I don't speak about it really x

 

[CARNAT22]

Sorry to hear this hun, we all have shitty days but an anniversary looming always makes it that bit harder.

I say plan something nice and indulgent for next week - something not baby related (so cocktails or a nice bottle of wine) something you enjoy and something to commemorate the date but in a positive way.

All other aspects of life feel worse when you have a day / period like this.

Hugs hun and I hope the weekend helps refresh you.

X

 

[lisey]

Thanks hun.

I am going to try and think of something nice to do to take my mind off it over the coming week. OH is looking after me this eve with lots of lovely food and a dvd night as he knows I am feeling low.

I think I will feel better once the date passes, its just hard not to imagine where you would be at that stage. I am sure anyone who has had a loss feels this way, its just soul destroying sometimes xx

 

[laurat]

Oh Im sorry you feel this way. Certain dates are just really tough! As Carnatt says do someting together that is really special next weekend. Spend time enjoying each other! Xx

 

[charli_]

im so sorry you are feeling this way and im glad your oh is being so nice! ive known people who have had a miscarriage and their boyfriend or husband have been so unsuportive! feel glad you have him and i hope you feel better soon, big hugs xxx

 

[Lou1103]

Sorry hun, i have days like this too and am always wishing away the days. We had the same due date will be thinking of u xxx

 

[lisey]

Oh Im sorry you feel this way. Certain dates are just really tough! As Carnatt says do someting together that is really special next weekend. Spend time enjoying each other! Xx

Thanks, I am going to speak to him and make sure we plan something nice, a way to remember our little one too xx

im so sorry you are feeling this way and im glad your oh is being so nice! ive known people who have had a miscarriage and their boyfriend or husband have been so unsuportive! feel glad you have him and i hope you feel better soon, big hugs xxx

Thanks, yes he is amazing and will do whatever he can to make me feel better so I am happy I have him to help me through and for me to help him too. He doesn't speak about it (typical man) but I am sure he feels it too xx

Sorry hun, i have days like this too and am always wishing away the days. We had the same due date will be thinking of u xxx

I didn't realise we had the same due date. Its so hard as its approaching isn't it
Thinking of you too xx

 

[Lou1103]

I know and it was so weird that we miscarried within a day of each other. It is hard but i find it much easier than the due date of my first pregnancy :/ i feel mean saying that but i did sort of expect to miscarry which is a bad attitude to have really. Thank you hun xxx

 

[megsmeadow]

Big hugs honey. These days just seem to creep up and bite you don't they.
I'll share a secret, those times when I'm so overwhelmed with emotion and none of it helping me any, I sometimes go into my car and scream, but shhh don't tell anyone! try it though, it's quite therapeutic, just not when OH is sat next to you, you'll frighten the living day lights out of him!

 

[VickyClare]

Hi Lisey, I know exactly how you feel. I hate seeing pregnant women, thinking "that should be me". I've also noticed an increase of Clearblue pregnancy tests ads on tv which I have never seen before.

And your post is not pointless, it's what we all feel after such a devastating loss. I feel your pain. I hope that you and your oh are ok and that in time you will feel some peace.

My thoughts and love are with you all. If you ever want to message me then feel free. We all care x x x

 

[lisey]

I know and it was so weird that we miscarried within a day of each other. It is hard but i find it much easier than the due date of my first pregnancy :/ i feel mean saying that but i did sort of expect to miscarry which is a bad attitude to have really. Thank you hun xxx

I do know what you mean, I think the first one is the scariest because you don't know what to expect and the unknown is always terrifying and I also know what you mean about expecting it, I think that that's going to be how it is in the future for me too, the excitement and naivety of pregnancy will always be tainted by the knowledge of knowing how heart-breaking miscarriage is xx

Big hugs honey. These days just seem to creep up and bite you don't they.
I'll share a secret, those times when I'm so overwhelmed with emotion and none of it helping me any, I sometimes go into my car and scream, but shhh don't tell anyone! try it though, it's quite therapeutic, just not when OH is sat next to you, you'll frighten the living day lights out of him!

Do you know, that sounds like a good idea and I just might try it, sometimes I feel like screaming but wouldn't want to scare everyone in the house xx

Hi Lisey, I know exactly how you feel. I hate seeing pregnant women, thinking "that should be me". I've also noticed an increase of Clearblue pregnancy tests ads on tv which I have never seen before.

And your post is not pointless, it's what we all feel after such a devastating loss. I feel your pain. I hope that you and your oh are ok and that in time you will feel some peace.

My thoughts and love are with you all. If you ever want to message me then feel free. We all care x x x

Thanks so much hun, that's so kind of you xx

I notice the pregnancy test adverts and the baby adverts are on more frequently than I ever noticed before too x

 

[T84]

hope you feel a bit better today hon and have a good weekend x x

 

[lisey]

Thanks hun, I do feel a bit better today, the gloom has lifted a little after a lovely relaxing eve, just me and my OH x

 

[timtam78]

Hi Lisey, I haven't spoke to you on here in a while and wanted to send you some big hugs
Glad you are feeling a bit better today. Go have some pampering and do some things to treat yourself duck
Xxxx

 

[lisey]

Thanks timtam, I plan to have a lovely relaxing Saturday eve and then hopefully a family day out tomorrow if the rain stops. Hope you're well?

I don't know what I would do without all of you lovely ladies, thanks everyone for being so lovely and supportive xx

 

[Lou1103]

Hope you're ok xxx

 

[lisey]

I am doing ok hun, results next week so focusing on that but hard not to think of my little one today. Have you had your appointment yet? How are you doing? x

 

[her13]

Awww poor you I get days like this too sometimes i know it's been building up for a week or two and I know a big crying meltdown is about to come like now for instance I feel v stressed . Today valentines day is my bad scan day of the first one I lost which was the worst as such a shock to me and partner, so this day always has a gloom over it now and I can't help but remember xx big hugs xx

 

[lisey]

Awww poor you I get days like this too sometimes i know it's been building up for a week or two and I know a big crying meltdown is about to come like now for instance I feel v stressed . Today valentines day is my bad scan day of the first one I lost which was the worst as such a shock to me and partner, so this day always has a gloom over it now and I can't help but remember xx big hugs xx

Hugs to you too hun, these days are always hard xx

 

[Lou1103]

I am doing ok hun, results next week so focusing on that but hard not to think of my little one today. Have you had your appointment yet? How are you doing? x

I know

My appt was yesterday. My appt was 2:30 and was seen at 4... they didn't send our chromosome tests off as the day i had the tests 1st july - they stopped testing bloods and tested the baby instead.
I wasn't told that and they had my baby so i don't know what went on there. All other tests came back fine so no issues which i know is good. My consultant suggested taking baby aspirin from bfp and she will prescribe progesterone from bfp until 12 weeks. she also said those methods have around 50/50 success rate but the best method is reassurance and she will personally scan me every week between 6 and 12 weeks.

It is positive but i don't feel any closer to having a baby :/

Good luck with your results hun, let me know how it goes xxxx