Help... It's a mess... Advice needed!

[Hunnie]

I also agree with what the other girls have said and think that you need to be strong and tell him that enough is enough. Although you may like meeting him again, even if its only just for sex, the truth is that if you let him take advantage then he will and in the long run it will only be you that feels more hurt when it all ends.

I also think its quite rich of him to say that he doesn't want you to go out because he thinks its sick whilst your carrying his baby. Excuse me but does he not realise that you probably think its sick that he's going shagging some other woman whilst he has a baby on the way with you and that he should be being responsible and start acting his age instead of running away from everything!?! Men like this really rile me!!

I know you're scared about the prospects of being a single mum but in all honesty if you were to stay together and make a go of it I think you may as well be a single parent as I cant see him sticking up for you and supporting you in the way that he should, especially if at 35 he cant even stand up to his own mother when it comes to things that are going on his life and not hers! It will be hard but with everything thats going on in your life right now it will definitely feel like its going to be worse than it actually is.

I would also agree to let him come to all appointments etc. but at the same time you need to start looking into your rights and what you are entitled to from him as he is the father.

 

[Hunnie]

Adding as well to that, you always have the support and help of the ladies on this forum !!

 

[BevG]

i would have stuffed him in the bin! id be furious to be told that he'd been stringing me along for 5 years all the while him thinking we had no future....wtf? id tell him to go grow a pair and stand up to him mum and make his own decisions for once, i would not sleep with him as why would he have any need to commit to you if he gets what he wants without doing so. the baby would have my surname and not be allowed anywhere near his harpy of a mother since she never wanted him to be born. if he wanted to get back with me there would be untold ages of begging and making up to do as i know i could find someone else to love me and my child as can you. there really are lots of nice men out there and no woman should put up with being treated as a temporary plaything like that!

 

[1986princess]

sorry to hear you are going through this, he really doesnt deserve you behaving like this! try to take a step away and look after you and your little one, hope it improvs hun. thinking of you x

 

[poppypd]

Having read your story and all the replies, I am truly sorry that you are going through this at what should be a positive and happy time in your life. Personally after years of having 'no good' boyfriends, at 35 I finally got together with my OH who is my best friend. I now look back at those that didn't love me properly and think what was I thinking!!! Easy to say now of course, and it's hard to keep the faith when you're so heart broken! The fact that he has broken your heart at this important time in your life is enough to prove he is a loser of the highest calibre!!! Some men can belittle you and make you feel that you only deserve what they are offering you. This is 100% not the case, we women are stronger than men, and you will be a fabulous mum and like so many on here have said you will meet someone worthy of you one day! From all you've said, this man is not worth anything! I would imagine even his male friends would tell him he's being a total prick!! Like mother like son on the emotional intelligence front! Even if I had a son who got a girl pregnant at 15 I would make sure he did the right thing by his child!

However after everything i've said, again from experience I know you will only get out of this relationship when you are really ready to, when that one thing tips you over the edge. But stay healthy for the baby! A broken heart needs time to mend and maybe now is the time to let it start that slow process to healing by getting rid of him?


Support is here on the forum, just reach out when you need it!

xxx

 

[Hunnie]

there really are lots of nice men out there and no woman should put up with being treated as a temporary plaything like that!

very very true!!

 

[Dragonfly Fi]

Well... unless she likes it!

When i was pregnant with Jasper i NEEDED to have sex, i would rather have been 'used' by Liam and then shown him the boot when the baby was born than have to attend to myself constantly!

If she not totally overwhelmingly horny then i would agree... but actually its VERY lonely being pregnant and you can crave male affection, if hes giving it and she wants it and its not too painful then i would say carry on. But definitely make sure YOU are pulling the puppet strings, even if he doesnt realise it yet!

 

[ippa]

You are worth so much more than this hun!
Being a single mum, yes it's difficult, but you just manage! You will be fantastic!
I hope you manage to get it all sorted before your lo arrives as it will make it more difficult when you have a baby to look after!
My baby's dad doesn't want anything to do with him and has now skipped the country, so I am totally doing it alone but it means I can make all the decisions to how I want him raised and can take all the credit !
It's best to be happy and on your own then miserable in a relationship!
I hope it all works out for you!
XxX