For those who have given birth...

[Starchild]

I'm getting to the stage where I'm terrified of how much it's going to hurt. I'm not naive, I get that it will hurt, a lot, but what I wanna know is,

What kind of pain is it?

I'm worried it's going to be really intense period pains, (I wake up with these at the minute, especially when my bladder is full)

Any other kind of pain I think I could take, but the crampy, period type ache makes me feel sick.

Also added question, what exactly does gas & air do? Is it any good?

 

[CARNAT22]

It's hard to explain and it's very subjective. Every woman will feel labour pains differently.

My Advice would be to NOT ask about other people's labours. When I was in Tri 3 I stopped reading the birth announcements (well the gory bits), I wouldn't watch OBEM and I didn't ask anyone with kids what their labour was like as I was determined to have my labour with an open mind.

It is nothing to fear, in fact being afraid sets off chemicals in your body that are counterproductive to labour.

I would suggest reading the Maggie Howell Natal Hypnotherapy book, even if you don't use any of the techniques the book debunks a lot of myths about labour, discusses and explains why there is nothing to fear and is generally a very reassuring read.

Also you can discuss pain relief options with your MW. G&A was amazing for me but some women don't rate it - again it's very subjective and the best way you can prepare yourself is to find out what options are out there for you.

It does hurt, it hurts beyond words but the reward is also beyond words.

I look forward to doing it all over again, despite the pain.

X

 

[purpleslurple]

Carnat is right - it does hurt beyond words but there's a psychological side to it, you know that it's a means to an end and for me that gave me the impetus to just grin and bear it. You will find your own way to cope - towards the end I kept curling into a ball on the floor with each contraction.

With the pushing stage, I found it burnt like crazy but I was just so determined by then to get LO out that I just literally pushed through it.

You'll be fine as you'll be well rewarded for your effort!! xx

 

[Cherrybelly]

I agree with what the other ladies have said, don't listen to anyone else's birth stories. No-one can explain to you what labour is like, you'll only know once you've gone through it. Contractions hurt but in the spaces inbetween them you'll feel ok so just remember that I never got to the pushing stage as I got stuck at 8cm so had a csection but really enjoyed gas and air xxx

 

[SaraLouise]

Yeah it hurts like hell, and yeah there will come some contractions where you'd rather chop limbs off then go through it. But remember.. you have breaks between them.. and there's always an epidural

 

[nds]

nat's right - it's personal, we all feel it differently, yes it hurts, i personally didn't feel this 'ring of fire' everyone feels when pushing, but had terrible pain in my side whilst i wasnt pushing.. it's very hard to describe, you just have to experience it! gas and air made me go completely out of it, good for pain but i can't remember a lot - unsure if that's an effect of the G&A or literally having no sleep for three days before, xxx

 

[Rubydoo]

I was petrified first time and ended up having a really rough back to back labour but it hasn't stopped me doing it again.

I'd describe my contractions as the same as when you have the runs, those tight cramps but much more intense, I didn't feel any pain during pushing as I had an epidural after 26 hours and plan to have one earlier this time.

I didn't believe people when they said you forget it but you really do.

 

[babyslog]

It really is so different for everybody!
Just reading the above posts and sharing labour experiences with friends and family no birth is the same!

My mum for some reason thinks for her goving birth to girls was easier than boys lol!? (she has 2 of each)

For me.. Personally, i dont think it was all that bad.. I didnt scream ( really never understood why on obem they waste all the energy screaming!!?) i just shouted f*ck & sh*t twice when head was crowning lol.
I managed on just gas & air, didnt feel the need for anything stronger. It didnt in any means numb the pain, just made me feel off my face! I just found biting on the nozzle helped!
But theres no saying my next baby (if im lucky enough to have more) will be plain sailing.


I had a 2nd degree tear and i was screaming more being stitched up than i was having contractions LOL!

My advise is just go in open minded!
Soon as that baby is out u seriously just dont care about anything uve jus gone through xx

 

[littlemonkey]

Just echoing what everyone else has said, just keep an open mind towards it all and don't have too many expectations.

I never got to the pushing stage like Cherrybelly, I didn't progress after an induction and had an emergency section. Almost a year and a half on, I don't really remember much of when LO was born as terrible as that sounds, mainly because of pain reflief, tiredness etc making it all a bit fuzzy at the time. I remember feeling pretty rubbish after my c-section but even still I am considering going through it all again for a second!

Find out what is available to you for pain relief beforehand. I went in with the attitude of I would start with gas and air and see how it went. I then had diamorphine later on and a spinal obviously for my section. I remember the worst thing was not being able to get comfortable during contractions, couldn't sit or stand. It couldn't have been that bad though as at one point I nodded off!

Despite how difficult my labour was, and how crap I felt afterwards (for about 3 months physically), I recovered and it was only a tiny amount of time compared with the time I will have in life with my LO. It was worth every second to see his wee smile now. Like I said I would happily do it all again for another!

 

[CARNAT22]

Pushing was my fave part

I found early labour horrible but once I got put on the drip (to speed things up was on it from 6cm - 10cm) I preferred it.

Pain was a lot more intense but I knew it was going somewhere. I had been in labour at home for 36h and thought I was going to remain in early labour forever

X

 

[flisstebbs]

Don't be scared, there are so many things they can do for you if it hurts more than you can bear. I had a lovely epidural. It was wonderful, could still feel everything, and pushed my baba out, but it made it all totally bearable.

Epidurals sound scary but I didn't even feel mine go in!

I'd also done loads of hypnobirthing preparation and was in a good positive relaxed state of mind which I'm sure helped.

I still remember labour as one of the best experiences in my life despite there being a certain amount of pain involved.

 

[Starchild]

A big thank you to everyone for their answers. Feeling a little less anxious & at the same time quite intrigued as to how my experience will go.

I'll never be totally prepared I guess, I'll always be scared but I'm going to try relaxation techniques to combat that fear as the last thing I need is to get anxious & go into a panic.

Thanks again for your answers.

 

[Rachel424]

Like everyone has said, pain is entirely subjective and it will be different for everyone. My labour was induced, baby was back-to-back and it last 36 hours. At the time I felt like I'd drawn the short straw! But you know what, it has made me so much stronger as a person(I have generalised anxiety disorder). I think to myself if I can get through that I can cope with anything! The one thing that helped me during my labour was sensory deprivation. I put on an eye mask and blocked the medical environment out. I just thought happy positive thoughts. I didn't plan on doing this it's just something that came naturally to me. I concentrated on breathing through the pain (I personally found gas andair to be useless, but it worth trying it to see). I didn't scream, but then I didn't think I would when it came to it because I'm such a quiet person. It's just a waste of energy shouting or screaming and you need to reserve it for pushing. Focus on getting your LO in your arms and remember it's a NATURAL pain that's happening for a reason and you'll be fine.

My little boy is now my world and I can't imagine my life without him. It may not feel like it at the time, but trust me the pain is so worth it in the end.

 

[Kay Kay]

I was terrified of labour too. In the end I was so proud of how I coped with it, and for me it wasn't as horrendous as I'd imagined. I absolutely loved the gas and air, it just helps you float away for a few seconds. It's a surreal experience but you'll get through it and honestly will forget about after. Good luck hun xxx

 

[cornishfairy]

I think you just never know what will happen, if I had another baby I'd be just as scared because anything could happen, it could be the same as the first or totally different! Personally I thought I was fully prepared for the pain and had my tens machine, bouncy ball, massage oil etc at the ready but I was induced and the pessary really kicked my labour off very fast so I went from normal to agony in no time whatsoever. I never imagined I'd be the type to scream for an epidural (always had quite a high pain threshold) but it was such a shock I was desperate for one. It was the best thing ever! I'd recommend it if you're really straggling but like many ladies here you may find you are able to get yourself through it without anything or just the g&a - I personally wasn't keen on that as I was struggling to breathe properly enough to actually get enough for it to work and when it did it made me feel queasy but lots of people swear by it.
Prepare yourself for anything, I decided that although I had a hunch I'd cope well (ha!) I'd go in expecting the worst and then it wouldn't be a shock I think mine was destined to be very painful as I had a combination of being 2 weeks overdue, induced, back to back baby and the baby's heartrate wasn't quite right so I was on my back on a monitor for long spells. I'm sure it would have felt totally different without those factors and in a weird way I'd like to have another baby just to hopefully experience what it's like to give birth without those things impacting on it!
You'll do great whatever gets thrown at you, and it's so true, when you're caught up in the whirlwind of a new baby the memory fades pretty fast Good luck! Xx

 

[TaffyRose1]

I remember my mum saying to me it is very painful but you can and will cope with it and she was right. I found the pain more intense than anything else but I went into a zone, stayed calm and concerntrated on the end goal, holding my baby in my arms. I had a really positive experience and actually am looking forward to giving birth again xxx

 

[BunnyN]

As others have said it is different for everyone but I was really surprised that I loved labour. Yes it was painful but the breaks between contractions made it much easier than other types of pain I have experienced. There are also hormones rushing around your body that give a huge rush. To me it was kind of like running a marathon, painful and exausting but very exhilarating too. I may be strange but I can't wait to do it again! To me feeling in control was very important and I needed to be able to move around freely for that. I did a lot of walking around and I think that worked better for me than any pain meds would have done.