FOR SALE - ONE HUSBAND (update - serious now)

[babyblonde]

Please take him off my hands before I KILL HIM.

The conversation since he got up this evening has been like this:

him) so what are we having for tea then
me) don't think we've got anything other than fish fingers since we haven't done any shopping yet
him) oh right

five minutes later

him: (who fed the dogs this morning) have we got any dog food left?
me: why should I know if we have dog food left, you fed them last
him: oh, well we ran out this morning
me: well you'd better go and buy some then hadn't you
him: I'll get us something for tea while I'm out - what shall I get
me: don't really fancy anything much - just get what you fancy
him: oh, ok.

five minutes later

him: so what do you want for tea then
me: I've already said I don't mind, I'm not really hungry
him: well that's not very helpful, how do I know what to buy
me: because I told you to get what YOU want to eat
him: yeah, but what do YOU want
me: I've told you I don't know - I dont really want anything but I know I have to eat, just pick something
him: well I don't know what to get
me: well why is it ok for you to not know what you want but not me
him: alright I'll see what there is

five minutes later, about to go out of the door

him: so what did you say you wanted?
me: I'VE TOLD YOU I DON'T KNOW JUST GET WHAT YOU LIKE
him: why are you shouting, I'm just checking what you want to eat!

Is it me, or would you be equally infuriated right now??????

 

[Jade89]

If I was you I would be advertising him free to a good home and not for sale lol!

Men for you...they aren't very bright you see...

 

[Donna's here]

Sounds just like DH, are they all made from the same pod??

 

[Snuggle]

I got annoyed with him just reading that

 

[babyblonde]

THANKYOU! Thought someone was going to accuse me of being unreasonable.

It just gets so annoying as it happens ALL THE TIME in our house - he won't make a decision about anything and then rants at me because I don't care.

 

[HannahD]

Blimey...that could've been a conversation between me and my DH!!!

Yes, it's incredibly frustrating and annoys me immensly when I have the same thing with my hubby. He can't make his mind up on anything

 

[babyblonde]

You'll love this - he rang me from the supermarket:

him: do you like spinach?
me: not really, no
him: ok

returns home having gone out to get something other than fish fingers for tea because, and I quote, 'you've been through a lot and you deserve something nice' with......

SPINACH FILLED FRESH PASTA.

So, I have had no dinner.

 

[mrs_tommo22]

yeah same here, id have strangled him by now

 

[HideiLu]

I could have written the exact same thing about my OH!

We have lived in the same place for nearly 18 months and he still asks me where everything is! Scissors, sellotape, loo roll! Just wish he'd know not only so he could FIND the bloody stuff but also where to PUT IT BACK!!

 

[babyblonde]

OMG ok this started with a sense of humour but now I am so royally pissed off and in floods of tears.

He has just turned to me and said 'you look really depressed - perhaps we ought to get you some help'

To which I replied he needed to stop fobbing me off on other people and try being a bit supportive himself. He, unsuprisingly, took exception to this and proceeded to tell me how he has been bending over backwards trying to support me - cooking my meals, taking time off work etc'

Here's what has ACTUALLY happened:

1) He took one, count them, ONE night off work (he will claim it is two but he was meant to be off on Monday night anyway)

2)He went back to work on Tuesday night and told me if I needed anything in the night to ring my mum (he only works 15 minutes away and has a mobile

3) We had a takeaway Monday night, he made a carbonara on Tuesday night (because he fancied it and it only takes 15 minutes) and last night I ended up standing in front of the stove making sausages, cauliflower cheese and veg. Tonight he cooked himself ravioli and went to bed having made me nothing.

4) His way of consoling me about losing a baby is to continually tell me 'don't worry, we'll have another one' and asking me if I'm ready to have sex again yet.


All in all feeling pretty much abandoned and fobbed off onto everyone else and really alone.

 

[Donna's here]

Beks I dont know what to say hun, but things will get better. Youve been through so much the last few days. Just wanted to send a hug xx or 2 or 3 xxxxxxxxxxxxx

 

[babyblonde]

Thanks honey - I just feel like this is the one time I really need some support and I'm still coming a distant second to work, like always.

When I had a raging kidney infection and was writhing in agony he told me to call my parents if I needed to go to hospital in the night. When he crashed my car and I ended up with whiplash - my mum ended up taking me to A&E while he got some extra sleep before, you've guessed it, going to work that evening.

Stupidly I thought with something as supposedly monumental in our lives as this things might be different - guess not.

 

[Snuggle]

Babes, be honest with him about how he's making you feel. I dont really know what advice to give you as I cant imagine how you feel right now Sorry, I'm feeling utterly useless to you hun

 

[babyblonde]

You're not useless hun - you're being comforting and not making me feel like I'm completely insane.

I have told him how he's making me feel and I just get the old chesnut of 'if I don't go to work we can't pay the bills' (which is bollocks cos you are entitled to compassionate leave and he has holiday to book if necessary) which is always said like I'm a five year old asking him to stay home and read me a story.

I love him to bits- otherwise I wouldn't put up with it but I still think it's crap.

 

[Cori]

I'm sorry babyblonde. I don't really know what to say, but here's some hugs

 

[Donna's here]

My sisters fella is the same. He works over everything, even today I've been up the hospital with her coz shes bleeding, shes 11 weeks, but luckily at the moment everything is ok. I think it's his way of dealing with it more though, plus he's frightened of his boss and losing his job, but he is a bit of a lettuce! Even after her cesarian with Jake, he wouldn't take extra time off work, just the 7 days even though she could hardly move. She ended back in hospital with infections and split wound. He's a bloody nightmare. So it's not just your hubby hun. Some men just deal with things the wrong way!

 

[babyblonde]

Thanks hun - turns out I'm maybe not handling this as well as I first thought.

Think I was so angry at the way I was treated at the hospital that it didn't really get a chance to sink in until now.

 

[Snuggle]

He might be using work as an excuse to not face whats happened hun? Maybe he doesnt know what to say or do to make you feel better?

 

[Snuggle]

Oh and no-one expects you to handle things brilliantly hun, you have been through something awful and need to grieve babes

 

[babyblonde]

My sisters fella is the same. He works over everything, even today I've been up the hospital with her coz shes bleeding, shes 11 weeks, but luckily at the moment everything is ok. I think it's his way of dealing with it more though, plus he's frightened of his boss and losing his job, but he is a bit of a lettuce! Even after her cesarian with Jake, he wouldn't take extra time off work, just the 7 days even though she could hardly move. She ended back in hospital with infections and split wound. He's a bloody nightmare. So it's not just your hubby hun. Some men just deal with things the wrong way!

Sounds about the same. My mum ended up taking the afternoon off work to take me to the GP yesterday - because he wanted to stay home and get an extra hours sleep.

Perhaps we should let them meet and they can sit and brag about how supportive they are of their wives to eachother.