Finding out the sex

[MrsS15]

We're so torn on whether to find out the gender or not. Has anyone had a surprise and found out with another and can tell me what they preferred?

We have two boys already and this baby has been a wonderful natural surprise (after previously having IVF). We’re delighted with a boy or girl but our youngest is only 20 months so we’ve obviously kept everything from him. It feels like it makes more sense to find out. But I’m so worried we ruin the surprise for ourselves. It’s our last baby so not like we can do it differently next time

Any opinions would be great. Here’s babies scan picture if anyone wants a little guess xx

 

[chattychar1990]

I’m going to guess boy again x

 

[pupperino]

We're so torn on whether to find out the gender or not. Has anyone had a surprise and found out with another and can tell me what they preferred?

We have two boys already and this baby has been a wonderful natural surprise (after previously having IVF). We’re delighted with a boy or girl but our youngest is only 20 months so we’ve obviously kept everything from him. It feels like it makes more sense to find out. But I’m so worried we ruin the surprise for ourselves. It’s our last baby so not like we can do it differently next time

Any opinions would be great. Here’s babies scan picture if anyone wants a little guess xx

View attachment 87495 View attachment 87497

Aww lovely scans!

I was having lunch with my old boss the other day and she said that she had a surprise with her first and found out for the second. She said that the surprise was nice and all, but she was glad to find out the second time round as it made life easier for her.

I could imagine it would be nice to let the kids know that there is a brother or sister on the way - helps make it real? x

 

[Kitana]

I think it's a boy too!
As for finding out, it's up to you!
I wanted to find out with both my pregnancies because I was too curious with the first and allowed me to go shopping for girl things instead of boy's. With the second, we wanted to find out so that we could either buy new clothes and baby things or keep the old ones. Since I'm having another girl, I will just get the old things down from the attic!
I had received some gender neutral clothes from some people but since she had so little hair, it made her look like a boy anyways!
Hope you will let us know what you decide!x

 

[TTC no2]

I found out with my first and 2nd we didn't want to know. But I knew what I was looking for at the scans when they were measuring the femur. Of course I'm no expert so just love guessing if I was right.. it was exciting. I did get it right in the end. So I have 1 girl and 1 boy. We are now trying again so it would make sense to find out so I could get organise as I've kept both baby gender clothes from previous times but as it's our last I'm not sure. I guess we have to see if we conceive first and as a family decide . I think kids would love to know though.

 

[Lollypop79]

With my first I found out (boy). My second it was a surprise as kept crossing legs at the scan so didn’t know the sex. There wasn’t private scans back then. I felt unprepared and was a lovely surprise it was a girl but I wish I’d known. This one we have just found out we are having another girl. I feel I can bond more and i’m more excited. It’s good to tell the other kids too. They are older and both autistic so knowing the sex is definitely helping them adjust. X

 

[WinterWolf]

I want a surprise with baby number 2, whenever they come around. x

 

[MoominGirl]

We had a surprise. I was much keener on this than my husband but for me after a long time trying and it starting to feel like a military operation, a surprise felt like a nice change. I was happy to prepare for either and would have been happy either way. The practical side of me would have always got the big things suitable for either gender so I could use them again if I was lucky enough to have another!

As I was the one that pushed for a surprise first time, I'll let my husband decide next time whether or not we find out. I do think knowing the sex could be helpful for older siblings to prepare. I think that's the only thing that would sway me to find out second time.

 

[Elfs Mummy]

Have a surprise ! My third was a surprise and it was so lovely not knowing. He’s been our only surprise and I’d do it again x

 

[SesameSeed]

We had a surprise with our first but we bothered want to find out this time so we can have everything orgznised.

We have so much stuff from our DS and if we’re not having a boy we will just send it all to the charity shop.

Our plan is to try keep the gender a secret between us and we’re notgojng to share our baby names as we don’t want everything conformed before baby is here x

 

[Sparklisam]

Surprise for my first and my second !! Im 30 weeks and I am getting more and more excited.
Completely agree it would help prepare but to be honest my personal view is that it stops me over spending on unnecessary stuff.
We save each month for clothes we will need. Everything else we have is really colourful to fit both sexes. I have about 2 weeks worth of white / grey clothes. But I know my mum will arrive at the hospital with a gender specific outfit to come home in !!

 

[vampysgirl]

With my first one they got it wrong, inward told it's a girl, so bought girly things but I also bought neutral because I always thought " what if they got it wrong " then when baby was born and it was a boy, it was a massive surprise.. after that, I always found out. Mind you, with my last DS they didn't have to tell me, the way he was laying I could see straight away it was a boy. All out on show hahah

This time I'm torn, I don't want to find out but my OH and oldest DS want to know. I still have the cot and pram from my last DS, so it doesn't matter really ( neutral colours) but clothes wise I have nothing. I have my anomaly scan next thursday and I'm still undecided.
What I'll probably do, is ask them to write it down and put it in an envelope. Then we can still decide to find out if we wanted to or not.
Either way, I think knowing or not knowing has it's pros and cons. I'm sure you'll know best which one you go for in the end

 

[Summerwine]

With my first one they got it wrong, inward told it's a girl, so bought girly things but I also bought neutral because I always thought " what if they got it wrong " then when baby was born and it was a boy, it was a massive surprise.. after that, I always found out. Mind you, with my last DS they didn't have to tell me, the way he was laying I could see straight away it was a boy. All out on show hahah

This time I'm torn, I don't want to find out but my OH and oldest DS want to know. I still have the cot and pram from my last DS, so it doesn't matter really ( neutral colours) but clothes wise I have nothing. I have my anomaly scan next thursday and I'm still undecided.
What I'll probably do, is ask them to write it down and put it in an envelope. Then we can still decide to find out if we wanted to or not.
Either way, I think knowing or not knowing has it's pros and cons. I'm sure you'll know best which one you go for in the end

Just a heads up @vampysgirl, some NHS trusts wont do this. Ours is one of those that won't because if it's wrong and they put it in writing, you could take legal action against them. I wanted them do this with my last and was unprepared for them to say no so had to make a decision on the spot about whether to find out without my hubby present x

 

[vampysgirl]

Just a heads up @vampysgirl, some NHS trusts wont do this. Ours is one of those that won't because if it's wrong and they put it in writing, you could take legal action against them. I wanted them do this with my last and was unprepared for them to say no so had to make a decision on the spot about whether to find out without my hubby present x

Really? Oh I didn't know that. Great, now even more pressure to decide lol

 

[Summerwine]

Really? Oh I didn't know that. Great, now even more pressure to decide lol

Haha fingers crossed your hospital will be a bit more sensible about it but just wanted to give you a heads up so youve got a plan b!

 

[vampysgirl]

Haha fingers crossed your hospital will be a bit more sensible about it but just wanted to give you a heads up so youve got a plan b!

I really had no idea, so at least now I do and have a couple of more days to ponder on about it.
Thank you so much

 

[MrsS15]

Thank you so much for all the replies ladies. It’s really helpful!

Right now we’re definitely swaying to finding out. We’ve had two surprises and I’ve loved them - I’ve always been a huge advocate of having a surprise. This time it feels right to find out. There’s a 9 year age gap between our boys so we were starting from scratch with each of them so finding out didn’t really seem to matter. This time it feels different, I’d like to be prepared. Our oldest son also has behavioural problems and is very set on having a sister, I’m worried the surprise of another brother might unsettle him if he finds out at birth. Knowing before hand will give him time to prepare - I think. I am hugely worried we find out and I regret it. Well I don’t think I’ll regret it, just be a bit gutted I’ve ruined it for myself? I really hope I don’t feel that way. I loved the excitement of not knowing with the boys, this time I don’t, I’m just desperate to know who is in there

@vampysgirl my hospital have the same rule summerwine has mentioned. In my last pregnancy my mum jokingly asked if the sonographer could write the gender down for her and she said they wouldn’t do that. Hopefully your trust do but just in case they don’t, it gives you some time to decide what to do! Xx

 

[Kitana]

It's sad that some people thought it was worth filing a law suit over a piece of paper and ruining it for everyone else. Greedy, selfish people!

 

[MrsS15]

Well ladies, after being admitted to hospital again last week for two days needing IV fluids and medication for this horrible hyperemesis, I was so down and feeling so ill I worried about my connection to the baby. We had a reassurance scan booked so decided if they could tell us the sex we’d ask...

And we’re having a baby girl

It was such a lovely emotional moment. The sonographer whispered the gender to my husband and he got to tell me. There were tears all round!

I really worried I’d regret finding out after two surprise babies but I don’t at all. It was exactly what I needed and we’re so so exited - although haven’t told anyone yet! Thank you again for all your opinions xxx

 

[Kholl]

oh my gosh goosebumps! how wonderful, congratulations on your sweet pink bundle! I hope you feel better very soon, the HG sounds just hideously awful.