Feeling rejected by my girlfriend.

Discussion in 'Relationships' started by Babydaddy, Jun 13, 2013.

  1. Babydaddy

    Babydaddy New Member

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    So I've been searching the internet looking for posts of similar issues but each time I look I'm finding something completely off topic or female partners feeling rejected, so I thought I'd come here and see what happens.

    I'm a 21 year old accountant technician and a farther to be, which for me is extremely exciting with a bit of scary thrown in to. My partner 12 weeks along is 21 and a smart girl, holds a degree and works part time a couple days a week at a dog kennels currently. We don't live together although we have been given the chance too for cheap from a friend to live in a 2 bedroom house for half the price rent in a lovely village, but she didn't want to because she wants it to be new for both of us and I've lived there previously. I had no issues with this I could see where she was coming from so we continued to see each other when and where we could around me working at first it was fine she'd come round after work and I finish pretty late considering I work 30hrs a week and am in full times studies 22hrs a week, but as times gone on and as I expected she became more tired and wanted to stay less now I seen that as normal to, I knew she was going to be more tired and probably not want to travel round as much(I should probably point out we live a 10 minute drive from each other) so I thought I'd see her on my two days off a week which happened for a while but now she doesn't stay at all, I'm told it's because "I don't like staying at yours at the moment" this kind of made me feel like shit, feeling unsure about what it meant considering she preferred to be her before.

    I'm finding it difficult to deal with what is now seeming to me like a lack of intimacy, we don't have sex anymore which was something I could see coming but considering the time I plan to be with her 10 months seems like a short time in comparison so I just suck it up and try to be understanding there although sometimes I find it hard to not want to be all over her I just can't help being so attracted to her, but it's not just in a sexual sense but physically I can't touch her unless it's to rub her back and even then I feel like i'm unappreciated when she's satisfied I just get snapped at with "get off me now that's enough" we haven't kissed in ages and I don't mean an actual kiss but a peck on the lips every time I try she turns her head, emotionally I feel unattached like she's completely shutting me out now I barely see her If I ring her she doesn't seem to interested to chat it got to the point where texting her is the only way we could converse now I barely get a reply that.

    It's all starting to make me feel like I'm having a baby with a stranger, the girl I love just doesn't seem to want anything to do with me and in return I'm feeling less involved with the pregnancy and more rejected, I do try extremely hard to be understanding and patient for the most part I'm very laid back guy I don't get angry I do my best not to bring added stress to her I'm even take care with the people I talk to. but this is hard I at least thought I'd have been able to cuddle her without it feeling like I have a weekly rationed cuddle allowance. I'm so happy she's the one I'm starting a family with but I feel so shut out it's beginning to get me down a bit. I guess I just want to know if this is normal or at least normal for a pregnancy, I know they are all different but I would hope someone can reassure me.
     
    #1 Babydaddy, Jun 13, 2013
    Last edited: Jun 13, 2013
  2. leean10

    leean10 Well-Known Member

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    Hi, I didn't want to read and run but I would say that all of that is hormones. My OH feels like he is just "a breeding machine" when I get pregnant because I don't want sex, to be touched etc, I just want to be left alone as I feel achey, sick, tired, grumpy so I don't think it is anything personal (I don't have children but have been pregnant 6 times).

    She may start feeling better in a couple of weeks. I hope it all works out for you x
     
  3. cw25

    cw25 Well-Known Member

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    Awh I feel for you... But yep it is the hormones.. Ive been the same i the past with my OH and it should get better.. Have u explained any of it too her.. Suppose it could go one of two ways and she could be cross but really communucation is key my OH told me he thought I didnt want to be with him at one point and I was shocked I love this bloke (we only been together ten months) more than I ever have anyone, I still found him sexy as hell and realised a little effort on my part could go a long way and we made it through i opened up too him too so there was more understanding on both parts.. Stick it out us women are awful pregnant and most of us will admit it lol is she feeling down a lot in general by any chance?? It may be she has issues with lots of things cos of the hormones or even antenatal depression talk to her good luck x
     
  4. nikki_isme

    nikki_isme Well-Known Member

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    I couldn't stand my husband for the first 14 weeks on being pregnant, and I really mean couldn't stand!! I could smell his skin and just him being in the same room used to make me feel angry for no reason at all.

    It all ended when I hit my second trimester, and I'm now 20 weeks with no problems :).

    Just keep the lines of communication open and let her know you are there. She will come around eventually once the hormones have settled down
     
  5. jr30

    jr30 New Member

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    I know what you are going through. My girl just hit the 12 week mark this past week but past week was a nightmare for me as I thought I was losing her for good. Couldnt eat sleep etc...just horrible. This week has been a big change and today has been a great day for us. Just keep learning about what she is going through as best as you can. She was happy to see I am trying to learn and be supportive. She still cares it is so much going on for her. Just do what she asks, read and I found it helpful to post on her as people do try to help. Also talk with friends, vent to them...not her. Be there and things will work out. It will be hard but dont freak...she is going through a million times more things than we can even imagine. I found out the hard way but we had a great relationship before hand and are doing it together... also dont say it is the hormones talking with her..think it just dont say it to her. She is always right and just do what she asks...she will appreciate it. Good luck. And congrats.
     

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