Hormones or Falling out of love?

Discussion in 'Relationships' started by Daddy_2-B, Dec 11, 2007.

  1. Daddy_2-B

    Daddy_2-B Member

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    Hey everyone, I'm new to the forum. I'm a 20 year old dad-to-be.
    My girlfriend is 10 weeks pregnant, I know her hormones are all over the place right now but all we've been doing is arguing lately, we don't really make much conversation anymore when we're together because we're worried it'll turn into an arguement.

    I spent time and wrote her a letter one day to tell her how I felt and that I'd be there no matter what, she read it and had nothing to say about it. In her words "I don't want to talk about your bloody letter!". As she's pregnant, i do alot for her, I don't want her over-doing things and i try and do as much as i can for her, but i get no appreciation, she says 'thank you' and 'love you' but i get that tone that suggests she only says it because she thinks it's what I want to hear.

    We havn't got intimate for months which is understandable, I know she's probably not feeling very attractive at the moment but even if I try to give her so much as a hug or kiss, she's very reluctnant. She doesn't really like showing her emotions or telling me how she really feels. She doesn't seem very caring and can be quite insulting at times. I'm so confused, she used to be so loving and be so sweet, now its like she doesn't care for compliments or romantic gestures.

    Is all this down to the hormones or do you think she may be falling out of love with me? I'm scared that things are just going to get worse and by the time we've had our baby she's not going to want me around. I miss that bond that we had when we first got together.
     
  2. Craig

    Craig Well-Known Member

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    I know how you feel with that worried feeling about when the baby comes an everythin (mostly the reason why ive barely slept or ate for the past month), but id say its hormones - although everyone said that to me when we broke up and i know that wasnt the truth...

    Pregnancy does strange things - makes women even more mental (runs and hides :lol: ), but i do reckon its hormones at play, ive had some very kind words off a few people from here when i was wondering the same - and they all said the same thing, but could be something worrying her,she could be scared about it all? about whats goin to happen financially etc etc, an its making her react the way she is.

    if she honestly was falling out of love with you and everything i reckon she wouldve said so :)

    obviously you do need to know how she feels, but most importantly got to let her know youll be there no matter what (like you have with the letter), and make sure she believes it. just got to stick in there, and i hope its not the case that she doesnt you around - as i know how that one feels.
     
  3. mamichuli

    mamichuli Well-Known Member

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    Aww, sorry things are not great, but you are probably right - her hormones are running wild, and she is most likely feeling quite 'orrible at present - the first few months are not very comfy for mum- Just keep letting her know you are there. Hope things sort themselves out for you...
    :hug: :hug: :hug:

    Lisa
     
  4. bobtheunfortunateone

    bobtheunfortunateone Well-Known Member

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    :hug:
    Ahh guys! It will probably be hormones and I'm afraid this may carry on way after the baby is born as then sleppyness sets in! I'm the same, but at least I am aware that i'm being snappy! Which inturn, results in hy hubby putting up with the crying!

    Best advice is never say its only your hormones, because trust me, us women hate that. (eyes turn red, start breathing fire etc!)

    Do your best, but it will be hard to find a balance, either you are not doing enough, or fussing too much. But a random cuddle, kiss or flowers helps!

    ohh and make them still feel sexy, that helps too!
     
  5. tuck

    tuck Well-Known Member

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    it may be that she's feeling 'hemmed in', when I was preggie my hubbie wouldnt let me do ANYTHING, I couldnt even breathe without him being there and it felt like he was 'in my face' all the time, even if I went to a friends for a cuppa he would ring every 15 mins and I got so peed off with it that I began to resent him, I know he was worried and scared as we'd lost a baby the year before but there is being 'too helpful', is there any way you could sit down and ask her what she would like you to do to help. dont get me wrong it's good that you're so caring and considerate but your girlfriend may jus need some space,
     
  6. Lou

    Lou Well-Known Member

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    She's probably just scared about being pregnant. I was shitting myself when I first found out, and for most of the pregnancy for that matter, and we had been TTC for a year so it was no surprise! She probably see's you being calm and helpful and normal and she resents that when inside she is feeling worried and frightened and useless. Thats how I felt anyway and I used to get cranky with my OH because he was still the same but I felt like I was on a rollercoaster!
     
  7. Alexa

    Alexa Member

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    :hug: You sound like such a nice guy! :cry:

    She still loves you! She's probably in a daze of nausea and tiredness right now.
     
  8. MissSara

    MissSara Well-Known Member

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    Trust me i have the answer to this one, and it isn't that she doesn't love you, its she just wants to argue....lol

    I'm the same with my BF at the minute, bless him he's walking on egg shells, can't do ANYTHING right and the last thing on my mind is getting intimate if he tries to touch me i'd scream blue murder....lol

    I know what i'm doing isn't nice just like your GF proberly doesn't want to make you feel like this. But grin and bare it, its the joys of hormones and expecting a little one.

    I keep telling my BF that he was half to blame so he has to shuddup and deal with it....lol
     
  9. Melly+2

    Melly+2 Well-Known Member

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    Ill tell you now, i was the same as she is now, mardy, not showing any love, not even wanting to be near my bf, it did get a little betteras time went on though so i wouldnt worry too much about it, just give it time :D
     
  10. Babylicious

    Babylicious Well-Known Member

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    it does pass, the hormone surges are much worse at the beginning of the pregnancy until the placenta takes over :hug: :hug:

    I'm such a cow sometimes to sean i wonder why he puts up with me
     
  11. samandbump

    samandbump Well-Known Member

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    it will get better guys!!!! i was a right cow to my OH in the first few months of pregnancy, i thought i hated him!!!! i treat him like dirt!!!! but now the hormones have evened out a bit we couldnt be happier!!!!
     
  12. trixipaws

    trixipaws Well-Known Member

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    aww, u sound like a lovely sweet guy! i'd say its probably her hormones. we can be a bit temperamental (sp?) sometimes! :hug:
     

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