Don't think I can last another 2ww

[Kimberly]

On Saturday (only 5 or 6 DPO) I had a breakdown and couldn't stop sobbing. I just felt so low thinking that I am probably not pregnant again this month. The 2ww gets worse every month and I don't want to feel like this every month. I know I shouldn't complain, this is only our third cycle TTC since my miscarriage. I know others have been trying so much longer. DH's cousin is pregnant now after 5 years of trying. But it is totally affecting my life and I don't know how to make it stop. I really want to be pregnant again.

After the initial upset of AF arriving I feel pretty good right up until the moment that I think I've ovulated and then I am completely obsessed. DH tells me not to think about it, but it is just so hard when I experience all kinds of "symptoms" in my 2ww. I think some of them are in my head, but some are just PMS symptoms that I don't think I ever noticed before TTC.

After the way I felt on Saturday I'm really afraid to find out I am not pregnant. I felt so low and I'm afraid it will be even worse once my suspicions are confirmed.

I believe that I am about 7 or 8 DPO and here are the symptoms I've had so far.

Cramps - I just never know with these. Are they in my head? Is it caused by something else?

Metallic taste in my mouth - 2 or 3 times yesterday, but was not constant. (This was a new symptom for me, I've never had it before not even when I was pregnant)

Tiny veins on nipples - last month I noticed that I had more veins and bumps on my beasts too and then AF arrived.

Nausea - I woke up yesterday morning very ill, but I think I had a tummy bug. When I woke up it felt like the m/s I had when I was 8 weeks last time, but last time it increased gradually. It wasn't full on before my BFP.

Tender breasts - this started yesterday. The last few months it seems like I always get tender breast during 2ww, but it's usually only when I poke them. Yesterday and today they seemed to hurt without touching them. (but I don't know if maybe I'm imaging it)

Sorry for the long post. I don't know why I posted my symptoms. In my heart I know that 5-7 dpo is too early for the symptoms I've been having. I'm just really scared and I need a hug

Good luck to everyone waiting for their BFP.

 

[Huddsgirl]

o dear ........ it does seem like your having an agonising time.
but i must say all this worrying your doin is probably affecting the outcome, try to relax..... i no its easier said than done but the more u worry and and torture yourself it wont happen.
i have been trying 5 months now and this month i have taken a relaxed approach to it.
Just try not to dwell on your symtoms hun beause if ur anything like i am u will only have a list longer than ur arm
xxxxxxx

 

[MicheLou]

Aw, i'm with you. This is cycle 7 for me and I feel like i'm only just holding it together. I can no longer take hubby's banter and jibes as jokes and really get very upset at the slightest thing. TTC is taking over my thoughts and emotions. I am so scared of it never happening and to make things worse there's family and friends who are also trying for baby number 2 who are having agonising waits. one friend has just m/c.

I don't know what to say to you really. I can't comfort myself at the minute. I suppose I just wanted to help yyou relise that you really are not alone.

 

[Redshoes]

"When you reach the end of your rope, tie a knot in it and hang on."
I think this forum is sometimes the knot
Very best wishes Kimberly, hoping you get your BFP this cycle

 

[miffy]

I totally understand and sympathise. Since my recent miscarriages, I just want to be pg again too. This is my first cycle of proper TTC since last mc, and I was symptom spotting last week when AF isn't due til this Friday. I bought some tests yesterday but DH stopped me doing one this morning

Can't really offer any advice, just wanted to let you know you are not alone and lets hope we all get our BFPs this month!

 

[trigger]

"When you reach the end of your rope, tie a knot in it and hang on."
I think this forum is sometimes the knot

I think thats a really lovely way of putting it.

Good luck girls, I really hope this is your month.

 

[Kimberly]

Thank you for the replies ladies. I know I don't post often, but this Forum really has helped me over the past few months.

 

[MissSara]

i know how you feel hun. and my thoughts go with every single person who is TTC, its awful just waiting.

After my MC at the beggining of september, i thought that i would be one of those really lucky ones and be able to get pregnant straight away and never worry about it. But because i haven't it gets me down thinking i never ever will and that the MC was a sign to having no more children.

 

[Kimberly]

I'm sorry MissSara.

 

[DaisyRose]

Hi,

Just wanted to say that I really know what you're going through - I miscarried recently, have had other health probs, and this is my third cycle of trying since too. The two week wait is absolute torchure- I've had all kinds of weird symptoms (nausea, aversions to smells, aching) that mimic the pregnancy symptoms I had before (I've got two girls); I read somewhere that these kinds of (false) pregnancy symptoms are most common in married women who already have children (not married but close to it). I really think I am going mad sometimes but I want nothing more than a third baby.

My end of month moods have been affecting everyone around me including my girls so I'm really really trying to relax about the whole thing (still don't know quite how I'll be at the end of this month but I am going to really try). I think all we can do is stay as healthy as we can, keep ourselves busy and try and stay sane!!!

Good luck with this cycle

 

[WeArePregnant1]

Big hugs for you chick xxx

 

[Kimberly]

Well...I don't want to jinx myself, but I may not have to endure another two week wait! I did a test yesterday (I believe 10-11 dpo) and I got a faint line. It was faint, but def visible and showed up in 4 minutes. I always get evap lines and even though it didn't look like an evap line I still doubted it. I woke up at 50am this morning and did another test, the line was darker and showed up in 3 minutes.

I don't want to get too excited yet, because I had a chemical pregnancy in September. AF is not due until Sunday, so I'm really scared. I think it is a good sign that the line was darker though.

DH says he won't believe it until Monday with a digital test. Send good thoughts my way please!

 

[Kittykins]

for baby glue!

 

[DaisyRose]

Good luck for the weekend! Health profs told me it was very unusual for blue line to be wrong and I think it is a really good sign that it has gone darker.

Looking back, I think the line was much weaker when I had my mc (and I had a very faint one at one point last year which I've been told probably was a chemical pregnancy) then when I was expecting my girls - by day 31 the lines were really strong.

Good luck.