Don't mind me....i'm just having a rant!!

[Emma.b]

I could have punched some1 in the face last night!!

Wasat work, and couldnt get pathetic excuse of a person 'goldendragon' off my mind (this was before it all came out about it being a troll). Started to explain in to the girls at work and we got on to the whole ttc conversation.

When 1 person pipes up 'yeah but its not so bad for you coz u have a kid'. Are you fucking kidding me?!?

The fact that she doesnt have children and isnt even trying really got my back up, how the hell would she know how it feels, regardless of whether i have a child or not?!

I dont care if a person has no kids, 5 kids or a friggin hundred the urge, desperation and heartbreak each month when seeing that bfn is still just as real and just a raw! The only difference is a person with kids can never escape mentally or physically. The reminders are everywhere from seeing mums-to-be at the school gates, to mums pushing kids about in the park. I dread having to take my son to the park or toy shop coz i know i'm gonna be confronted by bumps and babies!! And we know exactly how it feels to be a mum, we know the joys and happiness a child brings, we know 100% what were are missing out on. (dont mean to offened any1 with that remark but thats how i feel at the min hense the reason its in this section).

Now i feel like i being a bitch coz theres so many lovely ladies on here that would love to be a mummy to just 1 baba.

I hate people sometimes.

 

[netty]

 

[katie_lou]

I could have punched some1 in the face last night!!

Wasat work, and couldnt get pathetic excuse of a person 'goldendragon' off my mind (this was before it all came out about it being a troll). Started to explain in to the girls at work and we got on to the whole ttc conversation.

When 1 person pipes up 'yeah but its not so bad for you coz u have a kid'. Are you fucking kidding me?!?

The fact that she doesnt have children and isnt even trying really got my back up, how the hell would she know how it feels, regardless of whether i have a child or not?!

I dont care if a person has no kids, 5 kids or a friggin hundred the urge, desperation and heartbreak each month when seeing that bfn is still just as real and just a raw! The only difference is a person with kids can never escape mentally or physically. The reminders are everywhere from seeing mums-to-be at the school gates, to mums pushing kids about in the park. I dread having to take my son to the park or toy shop coz i know i'm gonna be confronted by bumps and babies!! And we know exactly how it feels to be a mum, we know the joys and happiness a child brings, we know 100% what were are missing out on. (dont mean to offened any1 with that remark but thats how i feel at the min hense the reason its in this section).

Now i feel like i being a bitch coz theres so many lovely ladies on here that would love to be a mummy to just 1 baba.

I hate people sometimes.

I hope ur ok Hun xxx

 

[nicky1987]

I could have punched some1 in the face last night!!

Wasat work, and couldnt get pathetic excuse of a person 'goldendragon' off my mind (this was before it all came out about it being a troll). Started to explain in to the girls at work and we got on to the whole ttc conversation.

When 1 person pipes up 'yeah but its not so bad for you coz u have a kid'. Are you fucking kidding me?!?

! The only difference is a person with kids can never escape mentally or physically. The reminders are everywhere from seeing mums-to-be at the school gates, to mums pushing kids about in the park. I dread having to take my son to the park or toy shop coz i know i'm gonna be confronted by bumps and babies!! And we know exactly how it feels to be a mum, we know the joys and happiness a child brings, we know 100% what were are missing out on. (dont mean to offened any1 with that remark but thats how i feel at the min hense the reason its in this section).

.

I dont think there is a difference between women with children alreadya nd women trying for their first. Theres no escape for any of us. As you said the longing and the desperation for a baby is unbearable for all of us whether there is a first/second/third child or not. TTC is th emost heartbreaking pain i think i have ever gone through and the emotional and physical pain of it is at times unbearable!

Some people hun are just shallow minded and presume that because you have a child already then you should just be able to look at a willy and get pregnant! We all know thats not the case!

Keep your chin up and ignore the nasty comments because one day you will have your second little bundle of joy and we will all have our first

Big hugs

xxxx

 

[JJ Mum]

Well said Nicky! - I missed that one but - people should only offer support and comments that will be useful and supportive really, (comments that they would want to recieve themselves) - otherwise it just makes a hard situation 10 times more unbearable and isolates people - hugs to you XX

 

[nicky1987]

Thanks hun - took me a while to get down what i wanted to say!! It just infuriates me that people think its so easy to get pregnant!!

 

[Corrinne37]

Feel your pain Emma. xxxx
I have stopped taking my little boy to a a toddler group, with a bunch of ladies that i knew from when they were all newborns.
They are now all on their second child, and I cant stand going anymore, I feel so left behind.
Two mums were pg with due dates within 2 weeks of the first baby I lost, one who has just had a baby due date around same time as second baby I lost. (I havent phoned or sent a card to congratulate her yet, i just cant seem to muster the courage - not seen her either for about 6 mths!!)
These were my good friends, now its just too painful to be a round them , and my little boy misses out with being with his friends. (he does have other friends though- Im not that mean!)

But it is so true....The pain is the same, no matter if you have a child/ children or not.
Sometimes I feel that Im not 100 % concentrating on my son like i should be, as Im so strung out, and heartbroken and mixed up over all thsi ttc journey, and then I feel guilty,
AArrrrggghhhhhhhhhh its so horrid!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So yes, right with you there!! xx

 

[nicky1987]

I think we should have a big ttc meet up lol! With a load of punch bags!!!

 

[Emma.b]

Aww thanks ladies.

Honestly my temper through this Af is ridiculous, i think i have issues!

I feel loads better now, i dont usually rise to it, but Af is here (almost gone thank god) and i was sooo tired. Feel better for having a sleep, Im now tucking into a cup of green tea, was ment to be decaff tea but i picked up the wrong box! And a hot plate of pasta all whilst watching crap on tv....bliss!

 

[JJ Mum]

Aww thanks ladies.

Honestly my temper through this Af is ridiculous, i think i have issues!

I feel loads better now, i dont usually rise to it, but Af is here (almost gone thank god) and i was sooo tired. Feel better for having a sleep, Im now tucking into a cup of green tea, was ment to be decaff tea but i picked up the wrong box! And a hot plate of pasta all whilst watching crap on tv....bliss!

Glad your feeling better, I don't think you have an issue - I really don't think the progesterone that is in your system between ov and AF really helps at all, each month I turn into a Phsyco just after OV and it doesn't clear till hormones start dipping again when AF arrives - it makes everything you do and all your emotions much harder doesn't it. And yay for taking time for youself in front of tely X

 

[nicky1987]

The clomid turned me into an absolute mental crazy woman!! If someone said something breathed too loudly near me that was it - i screamed at them!!!

Got asked today if i was pregnant - they didnt believe me when i said no!!! Made me so angry!

 

[JJ Mum]

How are you doing now Emma? I see from your ticker your in your fertile period now - what's you plan for this month...

 

[Emma.b]

Hi jj,

To be honest my ticker could be out by a few days, i think my ticker is going by a 27 day cycle but my cycles average between 26 and 31 days.

Ive been doing opks since af went on cd 6, if i squint alot and hold the stick right infront of my eyes i can see the faintest of lines! I'm hoping it gets darker over the next few days.

I'm doing smep, taking pregnacare and going to use conceive plus as soon as i see the opk getting darker. Fingers crossed i catch the egg this month, but if not i have the clearblue fertility monitor to use next month.

Im taking this cycle as it comes, figured the stressing uptight approach didnt work so gonna try and chill this cycle!

How are you getting on?? x x x
​

 

[JJ Mum]

Oh wow Emma, sounds like you really have everything covered , and I agree sometimes letting things happen as they happen and less stress can make all the difference , maybee it gives you a happy and contented body and it says, oh ok I'll let this one implant then....

Good luck this month

Oh and I'm good thanks, had a stressful day today , got really nervous for my smear and then the lady was rubbish compared with all the ivf stuff I had on wed , I had to go and buy myself chocky after to chill out!!