Do you smack......?

[Meggiewoo]

I would be intrigued to hear your views on this - OH and I were talking about it earlier and are at a loss at what is for the best. We were both smacked and I for one don't feel it did me any harm - on the other hand I would hope I could, in the future, control Baillie in another way if it's possible.

Do you smack your kids?

Thanks in advance you guys

Kim x x x x

 

[Jen & Her Men]

I was smacked but personally i wouldnt smack my children.

I remember the shame I felt as a child being smacked and i really wouldnt want to inflict that feeling on a child of mine. The result of the smack worked in that i behaved myself but i dont think the feelings it left me with were positive.

I personally feel there are more effective and less harmful (psychologically and physically) ways of disciplining a child such as denial of certain treats, naughty step etc etc.

I saw an interesting program on it once and they compared childhood to old age and how certain old people "misbehave" due to mental deterioration which can be compared to the immaturity of a child, and you wouldnt dream of smacking an elderly person so why is it ok to smack a child?

I have to say that got me thinking and i do agree with it. I think that smacking shows a loss of control on the part of the parent rather than being a constructive discipline tool.

 

[valentine]

I was smacked too, but when I was much older.

It's illegal in Scotland, where I live, to smack a child under three - clicky. I'm not keen on smacking for over three's either, despite having been smacked myself. I agree, other forms of discipline will be better - it just doesn't sit right with me.

Valentine Xxx

 

[Meggiewoo]

I was smacked but personally i wouldnt smack my children.

I remember the shame I felt as a child being smacked and i really wouldnt want to inflict that feeling on a child of mine. The result of the smack worked in that i behaved myself but i dont think the feelings it left me with were positive.

I personally feel there are more effective and less harmful (psychologically and physically) ways of disciplining a child such as denial of certain treats, naughty step etc etc.

I saw an interesting program on it once and they compared childhood to old age and how certain old people "misbehave" due to mental deterioration which can be compared to the immaturity of a child, and you wouldnt dream of smacking an elderly person so why is it ok to smack a child?

I have to say that got me thinking and i do agree with it. I think that smacking shows a loss of control on the part of the parent rather than being a constructive discipline tool.

I think I quite agree with all that - I've never really thought about it before today.

Thanks Jen x

Kim x x x x

 

[CoreysMummy]

No. I think at the point I was so angry I would lash out (as personally, thats the only time I hit anyone) I coudnt guarantee that I wouldnt hit FAR to hard. So, its best if I just walk away... so NO smacking at all. He will be disciplined other ways... of which I will decide later on when he needs it

 

[Snuggle]

I was smacked too but cant imagining smacking Maddison as I'm hoping I can discipline her in other ways when she is older. At the moment she is going through a phase of smacking me and hubby and I smack her hands back when she does this which is probably wrong to do but if I try to walk away from her she follows me screaming and smacks me even more

 

[beanie]

nope. I smacked Seren after she threw a toy in my face and I did it without thinking, it still makes me feel sick and disgusted with myself to this day. I just don't see how hitting someone can get them to understand the difference between right and wrong. I want my children to want to behave because they know its better to, or that its safer to then because they are scared of being hit.

 

[nickilubs]

I have never hit or smacked anyone ever and I don't intend to start now.

I had been when I was little it wasn't so much that it hurt but as Jen says it was shameful and it scared me.

 

[poppy160]

Sometimes I was smacked as a child, with a slipper but not hard. We were little shits at times and my Mum was a single parent. We really wound her up! But personally I wouldn't smack..I've watched many episodes of Supernanny and will try her ways if I can't control Ella!

 

[tinkerbell*]

I remember getting a good slap around the back of my legs when i was about 6 years old.... mind you i had juct cut loads of triangles out of the bottom of my mums living room curtains! . hehe

i cant ever imagen slapping Theo. i think that there are otherb ways of dealing with challenging/ naughty behaviour, being a nursery nurse and looking after 20 odd children age 2 year old... i have quiet alot of patience anyway.haha

 

[Storm.]

I totally disgree wiht smacking a child, to me its violating there rights as a human being,

to me smacking them when they are bad just means they are going to associate bad with pain and not actualy learn what they have done wrong, why its wrong and how prevent it from happening again

I prefer getting down to their level looking them in the face and talking to them, to me that will earn you more respect and that child is going to understand much more then if you take a hand to them

Im hot about this, my hubby says smacking never did him any harm, but it did me serious harm it effects everyone in different ways, and I have warned him if he ever smacks our child he better fooking run from me and fast!!!

 

[keli]

I won't be smacking Cooper and god help anybody if they do

 

[Becky]

I remember being smacked once or twice and feel that it didn't do me any harm.

However, it's not a method I choose to use. There are a number of other consequences that we've found have enough of an impact on DD to make her think twice about her behaviour. I'm not saying that I would never smack her, I can't predict the future, but it's something I don't plan on doing.

 

[Tillytots]

I was smacked as a child and even when I think about it now it makes me feel sad I couldnt do P.E at school as I had hand-print bruises. My Mum didnt mean to do it so hard but it scarred me for life ( in a mental sense) Its one of the things she apologised for before she died.

I will never smack James, I know it teaches a child violence is ok and not much else. I didn't smack other children to my knowledge but I can see how I could've perceived hitting to be ok as it was the norm to me. There are plenty of other ways to discipline a child other than whacking them.

 

[Becs]

I won't be smacking Austin as I don't want him to hit people so why would I use it as a method of telling him that something is wrong. Am a huge fan of the naughty step tecnique and not rewarding bad behaviour with attention.

I was smacked when I was a child. I very clearly remember the last time I was ever smacked. I knew it was coming so bent over to get it over and done with. I remember a very poignant pause before the smack came and it never happened again. I guess my Mum felt a bit sick smacking a child who had bent over to recieve it - in hindsight it was genius on my part

 

[daftscotslass]

I was smacked as a child and I won't be smacking my daughter. I don't think it's affected me in any way but I won't be doing it.

I'm hopeful that if I can control a class of 30 odd kids at work (and believe me when I say the kids I had last year were a handful) then I might be able to control my daughter

 

[caz2008]

I dont see why hurting your children in anyway is right..but i have tapped my daughters hand when she has done something dangerous just so it lets her know by doing something dangerous she would get hurt,,

but i surely dont belive in smacking them its not right i wasnt smacked as a child but one day my dad did hit me wen me and my brother were arguing i was only 7 and he hit me i can remember running up stairs and shutting my door and not coming out ,..he later felt terrible and appologised but ive always remembered that moment and i dont want my children to remember me hitting them.. theres better ways to control your children i think.

 

[nori]

I only had a couple of smacks as a child and before my LO was born i didnt see the harm in a tap. HOWEVER, now i have my gorgeous little boy i would never consider doing it. I even had a go at my OH for his tone of voice the other day when ollie was screaming (it was just a little offish).

I will be trying the naughty step technique. Its amazing how your views totally change when you have a baby.

Claire x

 

[Meggiewoo]

It's really interesting how the majority of us were smacked as children - it seemed like it was a social norm. My mum used to actually pull my trousers down in public places to smack me and I feel she did a great job in raising me.

Do you think it has become more socially frowned upon and hence new ways to discipline our kids have come to the front? I remember when the smacking thing was going through the courts years ago and everyone was kind of appalled that they were trying to ban it. It's funny the difference a few years can make .

This is really interesting - thanks guys

Kim x x x x

 

[caz2008]

I think no one can tell you how to raise your children you just do what comes naturally and im against smacking but dont see the harm in tapping hands.