sorry
I thought I'd post my experience - not to scare/worry you but just to make you aware that there can be complications.
I had an early scan at 7w2d because I was spotting a little. I was told that the sac was empty and it was most likely a blighted ovum, where the pregnancy develops but the baby doesn't and gets reabsorbed. They couldn't be sure until 10w, but thought if it was anembryonic I would probably miscarry naturally before then anyway.
I didn't though I continued to spot. At the 10w scan it was confirmed that the sac had grown but there was definitely no baby. I was given the option of a D&C, medical management (a pill taken in hospital and necessitating an overnight stay) or wait for natural miscarriage. I waited for natural m/c - the bleeding made everyone think it was imminent.
At 12w the hospital was very concerned about the risk of infection, especially because of the bleeding, and I agreed to have a D&C. The operation itself was fine, I had absolutely no problems with it. I had a general anaesthetic and I found all the hospital staff, from the ward nurse to the consultant to the anaesthetist, extremely sympathetic. I was absolutely starving and demanded something to eat, so we're all different! But as for Mik's comment, whilst I sympathise with how she felt and was treated, hospitals are not allowed to discharge patients after a general anaesthetic if they haven't eaten something (in case the anaesthetic causes nerves/muscles to be paralysed - rare but possible. They will insist that the patient 1) opens eyes and visually follows movement, 2) talks, 3) eats something and 4) goes to the loo). Since I knew what had to be done before I could leave, I just went down the checklist and left the hospital about 90 mins later.
However, although I had a 'light period' immediately after the op, two weeks later I was still bleeding, still had a high temp, positive HPTs and just didn't feel right. Another scan showed I was still pregnant - the sac and placenta were still there and still growing. So at 14w2d I had a 2nd D&C. Again, no problems with the procedure, again I ate, chatted, went to the loo and was allowed to leave 4 hours early. Pathology tests on a large mass of tissue removed confirmed the consultant had got the placenta.
Unfortunately, I continued to bleed and HPTs were fainter, but still positive. At 16w2d, I finally had the most awful cramping I've ever had, then a big gush of bright red blood and then I passed a mass of tissue. I could make out the sac, but by then I was feeling extremely sick and revolted so I didn't look any more. I had a 'period' for three or four days after that, and then the bleeding finally stopped altogether. Thank goodness.
So my miscarriage ended up being 10 weeks of bleeding, two D&Cs and a natural m/c. It was horrendous and I wouldn't wish it on anyone else.
Would I do anything differently? Probably not. Had I known at 10w that I would m/c naturally 6 weeks later, I think I'd probably have felt 6 weeks of having all that inside was too long to wait, especially as I continued to have pg symptoms such as nausea. Also, there was a very high risk of infection - statistically, I was likelier to have complications from infection than complications from surgery. I was unlucky that I had retained products after the first D&C and extremely unlucky to have retained products after the 2nd. However, D&Cs also carry a risk of scarring, particularly with 3 or more, so I would be very wary of having another D&C in the future (I pray I'll never need one).
As others have said, it's a decision you have to make for yourself. If your baby stopped developing, chances are that you will miscarry naturally within a couple of weeks anyway. If you can bear to wait, you will avoid the risks of surgery. However, you should be aware that even if you choose to m/c naturally, sometimes the body doesn't get everything out by itself and you may need medical or surgical intervention. Personally medical intervention was not an option for me because a) I don't like pills/drugs (though I had the general anaesthetic, I refused to take any of the painkillers they gave me either time) and b) I hated the thought of being alone in a hospital bed for 36 hours miscarrying - I knew DH would not be able to be with me except during visiting hours. If your hospital handles it differently or you have different feelings, it may be an option for you. But again, you may end up with retained products - you have a higher risk of retained products with medical management than surgical.
Basically, there is no easy way, and no guarantee. Whatever way you look at this, the whole situation sucks really badly. All you can do is work out how you personally feel and cope, and minimise the risks to your emotional and physical health.
One site that may give you more information is
http://www.pregnancyloss.info
Best wishes with whatever you decide.
