Cosleeping?

Discussion in 'Pregnancy Chat' started by Ammdaz, May 21, 2013.

  1. Ammdaz

    Ammdaz Well-Known Member

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    What are everyone's opinions on this, especially in light of news stories like this one: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/art...isk-times-higher-baby-sleeps-parents-bed.html

    When my son was a baby we ended up co-sleeping quite a lot, more out of necessity than choice although I did enjoy the closeness with him. I always followed the safety 'rules' and I did my research and was quite assured at the time that it was as safe as, if not safer than, having him sleep in a cot.

    Then I read the above article and now I'm not so sure! I wasn't particularly planning on co-sleeping again this time round as we did have a bit of trouble getting DS out of our bed when the time came, but I kind of felt like it was an option if I really needed to catch up on some sleep. But reading something like that scares me a bit, so what are everyone's views? Not trying to spark a debate or anything, just genuinely interested to see what people think.

    Xxx
     
  2. SaraLouise

    SaraLouise Well-Known Member

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    I'm not planning on it but I'm not planning on not doing it ifykwim. Just gonna do what feels right for me & bubba at the time. I think with bfing its kinda inevitable that at some point you end up doing it!
     
  3. mummywanabe

    mummywanabe Well-Known Member

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    Baby will be in our room in moses basket but will never have it in the bed with us to sleep, id just be too worried id roll over on it
     
  4. mablestarr

    mablestarr Well-Known Member

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    It's amazing that human race has survived at all!

    Similar to others I didn't go out of my way to co-sleep but at times especially when OH went off to work I'd have baby in bed with me. When I had him in with me I was so aware of where he was that rolling over onto him wouldnt be something that would happen (although it is something that could happen and has happen).
    This time baby will be in moses basket in our room for a while but I know that there will be times when I'll probably fall asleep with baby in bed with me or even laying on me.
    I think whatever your sleeping arrangements are and your baby dies of SIDS then you'll be blaming yourself. If sleeping in a cot then I'd be thinking 'if they were in with me...' and if co-sleeping I'd be thinking the opposite. I also know of a baby who recently died of SIDS whilst in her grandmothers arms.
     
  5. katie_lou

    katie_lou Well-Known Member

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    I part co sleep , ruby always starts off in her cot but will always end up in my ed at some point . I love it .

    X x
     
  6. mummywanabe

    mummywanabe Well-Known Member

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    Im more worried about my husband, hes shocking when he sleeps tossing and turning all night half the time I wake up on the edge of the bed half smothered by him, so I thjnk safer to have baby in moses basket, although I slept in with my mum when I was a baby
     
  7. Gemsy

    Gemsy Well-Known Member

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    I'm not planning on having the baby in with me, I'm too worried. I am looking at the nest cot though, so I can have the best of both worlds.
     
  8. Jolly81

    Jolly81 Well-Known Member

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    I'm really scared of co-sleeping, but only because I'm inexperienced and don't see how I wouldn't roll over onto baby or how he wouldn't roll off the bed so I plan to have lo sleep next to the bed in a Moses basket. I made that decision ages ago.

    BUT...

    I completely disagree with the scaremongering from the newspapers. I've heard somewhere that the research used is old and not reliable and that current smoking/alcohol use has not been accounted for in the studies.

    I would take it all with a pinch of salt and speak to professionals to see what they think.

    This country's media is an absolute JOKE sometimes and there are some mummies who will now be terrified of co-sleeping just based on these news stories that don't currently seem to have any credibility.
     
  9. Frankie_Lou

    Frankie_Lou Well-Known Member

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    I've never co slept and never will.

    I don't think it's worth the risk just to get a bit more sleep or not have to get out of bed to feed.

    Just my personal preference though x
     
  10. giz

    giz Well-Known Member

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    I personally don't trust my husband...his arm is complete dead weight and he has no control when sleeping!

    That said I hate cosleeping anyway! we have our daughter in our bed in the morning sometimes and she is a fidget and kicks me in the back, whacks me in the face...honestly I don't get the attraction!!!!

    I value my own space in bed :)

    ----------------
    baby giz born 6th Feb 2011
    next one due 12th Aug 2013
     
  11. l_maclean

    l_maclean Well-Known Member

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    That research is sooooo absolutely flawed its unbelievable. There are so so so many things that they don't correct for. - Cant remember all off ghe top of my head but i think don't include the whether the co-sleeping was planned or did someone fall asleep, gaps in data filled in by computer and little consideration of whether baby is bf or ff.

    Due to SIDS in family I never ever planned to co sleep, but she's in our bed tonight!! After falling a sleep feeding DD I had to take steps. (She's in our bed tonight) Falling asleep while feeding, or cause you are sooo tired you can't function is FAR more dangerous than proper co-sleeping. It wasn't about me getting a bit extra sleep, it was about ensuring my little girl was safe - I was too tired to get her back into the crib safely so I made my bed a safe place to be.

    If you co-sleep properly ( I.e. - ensuring no pillows/duvets near LO, no smokers, drink, etc) there are plenty of studies which state it doesn't increase risk at all.


    In fact to be perfectly frank about it, you could apply most of the same logic to formula feeding - Formula feeding increases the chance of a SIDS death!

    In countries such a Japan where co-sleeping is the norm SIDS is almost unheard of!


    On my iPhone - so cant see tickers :(
     
  12. lizsamuel80

    lizsamuel80 Well-Known Member

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    Why do they say Co-sleeping can increase risk of SIDS???? SIDS is different to suffocation. SIDS is where they just stop breathing. When they do an autopsy there is a difference in the lungs that prove that the baby died of SIDS rather than other means. They shouldn't slap the SIDS label on these types of things they don't know what causes it. In any case co sleeping would probably reduce the risk of SIDS but increase the risk of suffocation tell it like it is.

    It even says on the 88% of deaths could have been prevented. Those babies did not die of SIDS then it was suffocation or crush injuries. True SIDS is not preventable it just happens.
     
    #12 lizsamuel80, May 22, 2013
    Last edited: May 22, 2013
  13. Colourmeblue

    Colourmeblue Well-Known Member

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    Im not planning on co-sleeping, would just be too worried that one of us would roll on to her in our sleep. I remember how over tired i was with my first during the first few weeks, and when your that tired I think you fall into a deeper sleep, so i just wouldnt want to risk it x
     
  14. CARNAT22

    CARNAT22 Well-Known Member

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    Whilst I agree the article is nothing but scare-mongering and the research is questionable, if there is a minute chance something is going to increase the risk of hurting James I am not going to do it.

    However for many months James has come in with us for an hour in the morning (he currently wakes at 5am so this hour is 'essential' LOL). I never go into a deep sleep, I make sure he cannot get covered by duvet / pillow and OH is very aware he is with us.

    James very rarely goes back to sleep himself though.

    xxxxxxx
     
    #14 CARNAT22, May 22, 2013
    Last edited: May 22, 2013
  15. Ammdaz

    Ammdaz Well-Known Member

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    Thank you for all your replies ladies, it's really interesting to read everyone's views.

    l_maclean, I think you make a really good point about whether the co-sleeping is planned or if the parent has just accidently fallen asleep with the child, obviously there is a big difference between the two. I can remember being so so tired feeding DS at night that I would often be nodding off whilst sitting in bed with him in my arms so co-sleeping was partly about ensuring his safety for us too, I was paranoid I was going to drop him otherwise.

    lizsamuel, I was also interested to read your post, like you say if co-sleeping had caused these deaths it would be because of suffocation not SIDS.

    I do agree that the article is a great attempt at scaremongering, I would like to read the original research but haven't had the chance. With DS I felt happy co-sleeping and if anyone questioned me on it I was confident in defending my decision. I just can't help but think that in light of articles like this if I decide to co-sleep again I'm going to be made to feel like an irresonsible mother!

    xxx
     
  16. MrsHop

    MrsHop Well-Known Member

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    WSS. I'm getting a bednest.

    I just wouldn't because I know I wouldn't like it. Sharing a bed with DH is bad enough! I wanna starfish!
     
  17. catty1

    catty1 Well-Known Member

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    If anyone is interested Unicef have published a really helpful response to the article.

    http://www.unicef.org.uk/BabyFriend...iative-statement-on-new-bed-sharing-research/

    Just to clear something up, the article in question is not a research study but rather a meta-analysis of data from numerous studies over the last 20 years or so from different countries. Unless you have some serious experience in statistical anaysis (which I do not) it's not going to be that meaningful. From what I have seen there are some serious flaws in the methodolgy of the anaysis but I wouldn't like to make a judgement on what this means for the overall 'take-home message' of the article.

    How parents choose to let thier baby sleep is a personal issue and one which should always be made on the basis of individual circumstances. Personally, I weighed up all the information I could find and made an informed decision to co-sleep based on my personal level of risk (breastfeeding, non-smoker, not obese etc..)

    It was the best decision I ever made for my family but I would never advise someone else to co-sleep as I do not know what thier personal risk factor might be, that is up to them.

    In general though, I would always advise people to never make important decisons about thier life based on something they read in the Daily Mail :)

    x
     
  18. JJ Mum

    JJ Mum Well-Known Member

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    I have coslept all of my kids at points to a degree , but eith breastfeeding my last son and with him sharing a room permenantly with us and hubby on nights, i always cosleep, my son and i really benefit from it, he gets slot of reasurance ftom knowing im getting in the bed later and goes down no trouble.

    No we dont drink, dont smoke and as ours are all winter babies, we always freeze as we haveduvet only up to our waists, we used baby blankets if top half cold when baby small , same as devon did.

    Will def be doing it again this time, just got to get devon out!! Ha
     
  19. Ammdaz

    Ammdaz Well-Known Member

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    Lol that is a very fair comment and I totally agree! To be honest what concerns me most is that some people (ie. my in laws lol!) are likely to read such things and then make me or other mums feel awfully guilty if they do decide to co-sleep.

    I will certainly have a look at that link you have posted.

    xxx
     
  20. Ammdaz

    Ammdaz Well-Known Member

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    I particularly like this bit from the UNICEF response :) It pretty much sums up why we began co-sleeping.

    4. Given the authors are advocating that parents should not bed-share, an alternative environment observed in other studies is to feed the baby at night on the sofa or an armchair (and sometimes fall asleep). The authors have chosen not to present this data but the risk associated with such an environment is far greater than co-sleeping in a parental bed.

    xxx
     

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