coping

[sam96031]

sorry to bother you ladies again with my irrationality but im really worried that im not going to be able to cope with a new baby. i love kids and think i can do the prectical aspects im just worried that i wont be able to cope emotionally. ive suffered from depression for years and am trying to get over it , but at the mo its been creeping back i feel so hopeless that i wont be able to cope, especially as my family live far away and i dont have many friends where i live. i know a lot of people are in the same situation and worse and i shouldnt winge but i need to have a good rant somewhere and now to top it all off DH has got a job interview tomorrow which if he gets it will entail him working some nights, i can cope if hes working days but i dont think i can handle nights as i cant sleep even if hes just downstairs . sorry girls you probabally think im being a psycho im just worried.
oh and if this is in the wrong place please do move it

 

[beanie]

hun. If you feel like you are struggling to do so at the moment it is really important that you tell your
midwife and make her aware of your worries and history of depression. That way she should be able to get support into place for you. Also after baby is here your health visitor is a good place to ask for support, I have been referred to my local mother and baby unit through my health visitor and see a psychiatrist there regularly.

Also find out where your nearest mother and baby group is, I hated the uidea of going to one of these but I dragged myself out at 2 weeks and as a result have made a great friend who I still see now.

Take care of yourself

 

[hels]

Hey Sam. Firstly, thats what we are here for ......to listen to each other moan and rant!!!!
It is a scary prospect isnt it? My family and friends are all a good hour away, and DH works away monday to friday, so i know just how you feel. It can get lonely, and i can only mirror what Beanie has already said, have a chat with your MW now, before baby is here, tell her how your feeling, and a bit of your history. She will take your worries on board. I was so worried when i was PG as i was extremly emotional ( and also a bit bonkers hehe ) i thought that id really struggle afterwards, it has been hard work, but i have been much better since having Charlotte. Try and stay positive hun, were only a keyboard away

 

[sam96031]

thankyou hels and beanie for your advice i will talk to my MW at my next appointment which is the 31st of oct and i had a good heart to heart with DH so hopefully thats helped thanx again

 

[Strangeness]

Awww hun I really feel for you. I've suffered from depression and social anxiety in the past. I was treated through a mental health hospital for 3 years and was discharged not long after Aaron was born. I was petrified about having my son because I thought I wouldn't cope (think I was about the same stage as you when I really worried) and to be honest when my son was born I was a whole new person! My depression went and my social fear got so much better! I'm never going to be the most outgoing person but I thought I would never cope with baby clinic and jabs etc but I've done them all! Only thing I haven't done is mother and baby group but that's because I can't find one, have found an activity centre for toddlers though so will be going there! Having a baby changes your outlook on things, all I thought was I need to do this because it's for my son etc. He's changed me completely and I've thrived as a mummy. Best thing I ever did and everyone has said how much better I have got. My support worker couldn't believe the change in me when Aaron was born and discharged me after a few months just to make sure I was ok. Seriously hun you'll be the best mummy in the world! I agree with talking to your mw about yours fears as even just talking is a huge help. Good luck hun, you're gonna be brill!

 

[sam96031]

thankyou its so reasuring to know other people have been through it and got there in the end ill keep you upated on how things go when i see my MW
xxx