Can't stop crying...

[knopk@]

Heppi, I am sorry you are going through this and glad you are seeing someone to help and sort it out.
I want to ask you a question - have you thought of giving her up for adoption?

If not, then you need to pull yourself together, go get help and stop being selfish and thinking about your ex. He is so not worth the tears.

You are reminiscing about good times but there wasnt much of that, stop clutching at straws and concentrate on a little person who deserves a better life rather than being thrown out of the flat.

Of course it hurts when the relationship ends but I bet if you were to sit down and put pros and cons of the relationship, I bet you wouldnt have many pros.

From your post it seems like you are trying to shift the blame on yourself/Fransesca for what he has done and its not right, you have to stop making excuses for him.

AND in the end of the day, it was your decision to go through with the pregnancy and you have to be responsible for your actions.

Sorry if it was harsh, but thats what I think

 

[ZMD]

Heppi, I am sorry you are going through this and glad you are seeing someone to help and sort it out.
I want to ask you a question - have you thought of giving her up for adoption?

I not, then you need to pull yourself together, go get help and stop being selfish and thinking about your ex. He is so not worth the tears.

You are reminiscing about good times but there wasnt much of that, stop clutching at straws and concentrate on a little person who deserves a better life rather than being thrown out of the flat.

Of course it hurts when the relationship ends but I bet if you were to sit down and put pros and cons of the relationship, I bet you wouldnt have many pros.

From your post it seems like you are trying to shift the blame on yourself/Fransesca for what he has done and its not right, you have to stop making excuses for him.

AND in the end of the day, it was your decision to go through with the pregnancy and you have to be responsible for your actions.

Sorry if it was harsh, but thats what I think

couldn't agree more, i hope you manage to get help as franchesca doesn't deserve this x

 

[littlemiss83]

Heppi

Its your choice & no one elses, and tbh it isn't anyone else's business what you choose to do. If you did decide to go back with him, you would need to lay down some strict rules & if a hint of any of this happened again, run a mile, as he's had quite alot of chances.

I would never advise you to either stay away or get back with him as I dont know you or your OH enough, and it would be unfair of me to say. Life isn't always cut & dry & tbh theres loads of people who get back with men that they shouldn't get back with & stay with men after certain things have happened.

You need to put Francesca first before you and OH. And he needs to put Francesca before anything else too, or it wont work. Please bear in mind that as time goes on it gets more & more difficult if he's not pulling his weight, you need him to be able to help you & be there for you & if he's not doing that at the newborn stage he might not be able to do it at all.

I hope either way you manage to work it out, and either way i'll defo be here for you & i'd like to think the rest of the girls will still be here for you too, no matter which decision you make.

 

[DaisyPurple]

I will xx

 

[Piglet10]

TBH i think katie knows we will or she wouldnt have been able to post her thoughts in the first place, we arent here to judge her but we wouldnt be her friends if we lay down and sugarcoated it

I dont want to fall out with anyone on here and maybe sometimes I am too harsh BUT if I feel like what I'm saying is true then I don't see a problem, Katie obv wanted our opinions and prob knew how we wud react but tbh she is now getting help so maybe she needed to hear it!

We are all here for everyone but it doesnt benefit anyone to sugarcoat serious issues and mollycoddle people!! *group hug* xx

 

[littlemiss83]

I think the only thing that could possibly have been upsetting was when you said she didn't deserve francesca - that was harsh chick. But I agree with everything else thats been said. Its hard for us coz we only hear about the bad things - I have biggg issues with a friend who's going through loads of problems & it doesn't matter what I say or what advice she gets...she does what she wants anyway. So i'm kinda of the opinion just now that ppl will do what they want in life an all we can do is be there to help pick up the pieces.

 

[Piglet10]

We have private mailed each other and theres no hard feelings, but you may disagree but from what katie wrote i still stand by what i said, now if what she said was heat of the moment or bad day etc well then obv my opinion will change too but for what was said I think me saying any less would have been irresponsible, far too often on this site people pussyfoot and parenting is a serious issue and I think that we can do far more with REAL advice and actually help, ALSO when someone posts a thread they are obv going to get conflicting advice and not everyone is right so you take the advice you want to take but I dont think anyone should not say their opinion just because it might be harsh, at the end of the day if Katie doesnt like my opinion she is fully able to ignore it, im not sure if I'm making sense :/

lol anyways I'm not trying to be rude if I'm coming across that way xxx

 

[littlemiss83]

Yeah it does make sense. Glad you and heppi PM'd each other & got it sorted. We all should be able to give opinions on threads. but Its so easy for them to spiral out of control & ppl say things they dont mean, coz ppl have such strong opinions that are different. I think as long as we give opinions & listen to other ppl's opinions, without arguing or disagreeing then it normally works out fine.

I'm in agreement with everything thats been said, just also wanted to make sure that Heppi knows we will still be there for her, you know what its like sometimes, when ppl give u certain advice & you turn the other way, you can feel like your not able to ask for advice again coz you've went against previous advice.

 

[Maria1977]

I think littlemiss is right and that you can give advice until you are blue in the face, but if someones gonna do something they're gonna do it regardless. It's just unfortuate that there is a little baby stuck in the middle of this destructive relationship. Francescas well being and happiness should be first and foremost and, just from what Katie has written on here, it's not a healthy relationship at all.

Katie, I hope that you and Craig can work things out to be friends at the very least. Maybe you both need to have counselling? Something with a mediator so you can both get your feelings out and points across?

xxxxx

 

[pinkymum]

How did it go today?

 

[Little Rose]

Hey Heppi, at the moment you are missing and yearning for what was familiar to you. In a short while, life without FOB will become familiar and you can start to move on. Be strong.x

 

[FebMum2Be]

Hope everything went well and you are feeling a bit better having shared everything Heppi x

 

[HeppiBean]

Things went well today/yesterday however you look at it lol. I have been given sleeping tablets and anti-depressants and I now see the clinical nurse once a week and the psychiatrist once every 2 weeks so that I can be monitored.

I just want to thank everyone for their advice and opinions. Yes. I had a bad day and everything looked worse than it really is. At the end of the day I do love my daughter. I just don't always see it.

Might not be about much for a little while, while I get my head straight(ish at least) again, but I'll try to pop on a couple of times a week to let you know how things are going.

((ps: It's my birthday today he he))

 

[FebMum2Be]

You are sounding a lot more positive Heppi, you done an amazingly strong thing by going and opening up to someone and getting the help We are here when you need us, hope Francesca is doing well x

 

[FebMum2Be]

Oh and Happy Birthday! Hope you have a nice day x

 

[HeppiBean]

Thanks I'll try my best, going out with my bro tonight, so should be good xx

 

[ZMD]

Glad you have got some help & hope you start to feel better soon. happy birthday xx

 

[DaisyPurple]

Happy birthday and I'm so pleased that you asked for and.got help xxx

 

[Piglet10]

Awww Katie this is fantastic news! i really hope things will improve for you! you have been very brave and were all proud of you and here for you!! like a lil baba flying the nest lmao xxx

 

[Squeakz]

Glad things are looking more positive and that you have the right support in place for you!!!!!!!!!!!! So happy that you were able to open up as well,! You should be proud of yourself!! X HAPPY BIRTHDAY x