can't believe i'm here...

[cc86]

... in this section of the forum! exactly a week ago my hubby and i split up. it's for the best because to be fair the relationship wasn't the best! we're still friends which is good but it's hard as it was 4 days before our 2nd wedding anniversary and we'd been together for 5 years and have a 10 month old daughter. it's even harder that we were supposed to be trying for another baby and i'd hoped (and thought he did too) that we'd get pregnant by january! i am feeling so so so bitter about it. hate pretending it's all ok just to keep a friendship with him to make things easier. i hate seeing peoples bloody facebook status' about their anniversaries / weddings / pregnancies. i hate seeing pregnant women, it makes me feel sick to my stomach. i guess i just wanted to write this down as i'm trying not to rant on my facebook plus i have his family and him on my facebook anyway​

life sucks! ​

 

[ippa]

Aw hun, I'm sorry that you are going through all of that!
All the girls in here are so lovely and supportive.
Being a single parents isn't easy, but you will be fine, you just have to get yourself into a new routine and take it from there.
I hope everything gets a bit easier for you, just stay strong hun!
XxX


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[cc86]

thanks i'm not worrying too much about how to cope with my daughter on my own because ex works offshore a lot and when was home was out quite a bit so i always kind of felt like a single mum anyway, although she is only 10 months old so it might get harder. but at least we're friendly and i've told him i don't want to have a "schedule" for him seeing our daughter, i've said he can have her whenever he likes just text/call me

one minute i'm fine and the next i can't stop thinking about it and i'm more bitter than sad to be honest. i've always always wanted a small (no more than 2 years) age gap between my children and i actually feel sick when i think that he's taken that away from me now. if i could have predicted this i'd never have married him or had kids with him in the first place (i feel bad for saying that as i love my daughter to death and she's the best thing that's come from this) - i guess everyone would do that if they could look into the future though

i hope once our home sells and my daughter and i have our own place then i can try a fresh start and it might be easier! xx

 

[beckibooxx]

Hun, all i can say its gonna be hard at first, i know how you feel but i suppose your gonna have to try for your daughters sake i really hope your ok... sorry your being put through this x

 

[Piglet10]

sorry ur here hun , hope ur doing ok as u can be! were all here for you ! xx

 

[cc86]

well it's only been 2 weeks since the break up but got to say i am having much more positive days! i handed in my notice to work so i can concentrate on starting fresh, the flat went on the market 2 days ago and received an offer today after a couple viewed it yesterday, so negotiations are going ahead with that, hopefully get some more (good) news tomorrow! it means a lot to me to be around just now because she's at that age where she's learning so much and i want to be the one she takes her first steps for, not the childminder! so i guess it's all come at a good time. so yeah, i guess it's good that i'm feeling more positive about things long may it continue xx

 

[daniph1]

Long may your positivity stay!! You sound like your taking slow but stead and positive stepsforward! well done you xxxx

 

[cc86]

well that lasted! i can't shake this bad mood, negative feeling, to be honest i keep having really bad stupid thoughts. i just don't see the point! i don't understand how there are "couples" out there who fight more than we ever did yet they're still together. i don't get it! i'm so so so pissed off and bitter. everything seems to be going wrong for me i am sick of it