Baby very unsettled when driving

[MissyAK]

Hi All,

My LO 4 months old, is very very unsettled whilst I take him out by myself in the car. He will not stop crying, it starts sometimes 5 minutes into our journey and lasts till we reach our destination. Today, I had to pull over about three times to console him, that worked for a short amount of time but he would start again as soon as I got back into driver's seat.
When we go out as a family, I do sit in the back with him - so obviously he's very used to me being there.

Are there any tips on how to deal with this? I'm going to try and take him out more so he gets used to it but his crying gets me so frustrated and down

 

[hellywelly]

Does he have dangly toys and stuff to occupy him? Also, you could try some positive association - try singing or playing a CD with him when calm and happy at home several times, and then when the positive association is made, play/sing the same song in the car and see if it helps. Bit of a long shot but it might work!

 

[MissyAK]

No to the toys, my friend did ask the same today. So will look into that.

Positive association sounds good, ill try that. I was singing to him the last time he was upset and he calmed down a little but then started crying. Ill see what I can do.

Thank you x

 

[babyscotcher]

Are you able to turn off your front airbag and put him in the passenger seat so that he can see you. Also makes it much easier to just reach over and console them. X

 

[Marcel]

I had the same problem with my lo at that age, he would get distraught and no amount of toys would calm him down. I ended up having to change to the forward facing seat as I think he just wanted to be able to see what was going on. He was a couple of pounds under the weight limit to change to that seat but it was happening on a daily basis so I had to change x

 

[Jajis]

Marcel it is both dangerous and illegal to put your child in a forward facing seat before they reach the weight limit. Please consider turning him back to rear facing if he's still under the weight limit The British Medical Journal actually recommend keeping your child in a rear facing car seat until approximately four years old as it is safer: http://www.bmj.com/content/338/bmj.b1994.

I would definitely look into whether you can turn the airbag off and have the seat in the front, there's some information about it here: http://www.carseat.se/rearfacing/position-in-vehicle/ and here: http://www.carseat.se/rearfacing/position-in-vehicle/front-seat-safety/.

There's a brilliant group on facebook called 'Car Seat Advice for Mummies and Daddies!' who give great advice not only on car seats, but also have a wealth of experience about making car journeys happier for everybody! Group is here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/289434267864378/?fref=ts.

 

[TTT]

My lo went through a phase of screaming so much in the car he'd start choking its very distressing.

I overcame it by trying to time journeys with his naps. I also tried to avoid going in the car straight after a feed in case it made him sick.

I also bought some little crochet butterflies off eBay and sewed them to the car ceiling so they dance around while were driving and distracted him. I put them above the headrest just in case they did fall off they wouldn't fall into his car seat! He also has a hanging baby toy that has spill cord and hangs from the handle above the door. Once I've strapped him in I pull it and let him grab it and he holds it for about 20 mins before he let's go lol.

If he's really bad, I sit in the back if my husband is with us and I massage his hands and sing to him. Babies are excellent at reading us though so you have to stay relaxed and smile as hard as it is. Of we can't calm him down we stop for a bit too

 

[Marcel]

Marcel it is both dangerous and illegal to put your child in a forward facing seat before they reach the weight limit. Please consider turning him back to rear facing if he's still under the weight limit The British Medical Journal actually recommend keeping your child in a rear facing car seat until approximately four years old as it is safer: http://www.bmj.com/content/338/bmj.b1994.

I would definitely look into whether you can turn the airbag off and have the seat in the front, there's some information about it here: http://www.carseat.se/rearfacing/position-in-vehicle/ and here: http://www.carseat.se/rearfacing/position-in-vehicle/front-seat-safety/.

There's a brilliant group on facebook called 'Car Seat Advice for Mummies and Daddies!' who give great advice not only on car seats, but also have a wealth of experience about making car journeys happier for everybody! Group is here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/289434267864378/?fref=ts.

My lo is almost a year old now so he's well above the weight limit. Also I didn't have the option to put him in the front seat as I was unable to disable the passenger airbag. My lo would scream inconsolably for as long as we were driving which made it more dangerous as I couldn't concentrate on driving.

 

[Jajis]

My lo is almost a year old now so he's well above the weight limit. Also I didn't have the option to put him in the front seat as I was unable to disable the passenger airbag. My lo would scream inconsolably for as long as we were driving which made it more dangerous as I couldn't concentrate on driving.

You can try and justify it as much as you like, doesn't make it any less dangerous or illegal.

 

[Marcel]

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[Marcel]

My lo is almost a year old now so he's well above the weight limit. Also I didn't have the option to put him in the front seat as I was unable to disable the passenger airbag. My lo would scream inconsolably for as long as we were driving which made it more dangerous as I couldn't concentrate on driving.

You can try and justify it as much as you like, doesn't make it any less dangerous or illegal.

Just sharing my own experience, you're lucky if you haven't had to face this problem as you've no idea how distressing it is for both mum and baby.

Anyway hope you manage to get things sorted for your lo missyak x

 

[Becky1]

My lo is almost a year old now so he's well above the weight limit. Also I didn't have the option to put him in the front seat as I was unable to disable the passenger airbag. My lo would scream inconsolably for as long as we were driving which made it more dangerous as I couldn't concentrate on driving.

You can try and justify it as much as you like, doesn't make it any less dangerous or illegal.

Just sharing my own experience, you're lucky if you haven't had to face this problem as you've no idea how distressing it is for both mum and baby.



Anyway hope you manage to get things sorted for your lo missyak x

An accident where your child was injured badly due to being forward facing would be far more distressing. You also did mention your baby was under the weight limit when you turned them round.

I thought TTT had some excellent ideas to try.

And yes I have been in the car when my lo has sobbed inconsolably so i do know what it is like.

 

[Sparklisam]

I really feel for you as I had this too. It's hard as I think you just have to wait for them to grow out of it. My Lo screamed every car journey and I used to dread going out. I've always been sociable and found it hard to have to deal with a very unhappy baby. I found his crying emotional for me aswell so that was harder.

Something that did help was a Tomy Lights and Sounds toy. You can activated it by a remote so can turn it on and off when you need it. They don't sell them anymore but maybe eBay etc might have one ?? I've attached a picture xxx

 

[littlemonkey]

Personally I wouldn't put baby in the front of the car. Although it's recommended to be just as safe with the air bag off, I think it's far too distracting when driving, especially if baby is upset. Also, depending on how long your journey is I wouldn't stop to comfort baby either. As harsh as it sounds, I just think it's prolonging the inevitable screaming fit. I found music and white noise helped my eldest when he had a screaming fit in the car. I once spent a 90 mins car journey in rush hour traffic with the same song on repeat cos it was the only thing that would console him!

 

[TTT]

Yes, we have a home made CD of los favourite music, simply red usually helps lol. We've listened to for your babies that many times my husband can't stand it lol.

Marcel, I understand where you're coming from but if you crashed while baby was forward facing before they're four they could end up paralysed or worse as their necks aren't strong enough. I don't want to scare you but I believe decapitation is even possible. We're one of the only countries to not make it law that they stay rear facing. hope this helps you stay informed

 

[MissyAK]

Thank you all for your ideas! I will try them out, anything to help him remain calm whilst driving will be great! Xx