I know exactly what you're going through, but obviously I see things from you're OH's side. Of course I don't know the ins and outs of what is going on between you, but this is how it was for me...
If you read my post from the other day you will see. My GF and I we're at eachothers throats. She hated me and I was starting to hate her, I made most the effort to keep our relationship alive, she hated me contacting her 24/7 and never wanted to talk to me or see. She had a go at me alot and was very insensitive to my feelings, so I just gave up and gave as good as I got and argued back.
This only made things worse, and I know she, like you, just needs space from us guys. We have no idea what you're going through and we just take it to heart when things go wrong. From realising that what I was doing was just pushing her away, I backed off and left her to it, stopped speaking to her and got on with my own things until she was ready, now things are great, i decided only to text twice a day and have a quick phone call at night, which is healthy. We have just got our own place and are moving in in a couple of weeks, so I'm glad we managed so sort things before then. I think you just both need to take a step back from eachother and have no contact. but make him realise what he is doing, let him know how he annoys you, make him understand how you're feeling, then tell him to back off, otherwise its just going to continue. I hope things work out for you in the end.
Sorry if that doesn't make any sense, I'm half asleep. I'm not well today