Am I being silly

Discussion in 'Baby & Toddler' started by Lilelephant, Feb 4, 2012.

  1. Lilelephant

    Lilelephant Well-Known Member

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    Basically we go to football every week but I said today it's too cold for O and also when we play Leeds there is usually trouble so I said I will stay at home with O, OH suggested leaving O with mil, now I love mil and she is more than capable of caring for him but I don't feel ready to leave him with anyone else, not even my own mum or OH. I am going to the theatre next Thursday so have to leave him for the evening then and I am dreading it!

    OH said I am being silly but I can't help it, I haven't been without O since he was born! :shock:

    I am not bf so that isn't an issue I just don't want him out of my sight.

    Am I being silly?


     
  2. pinkyprincess

    pinkyprincess Well-Known Member

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    Don't matter how your feeding him!

    I would NOT leave my boy even with OH! not yet. We were going to go out on valentines day but the day after making plans I changed my mind!

    The longest I've left Tyler is yesterday I left him in the car with OH outside while I popped into the doctors to register him.

    Tell ur OH that your just being a mum!


     
  3. l_maclean

    l_maclean Well-Known Member

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    Not being silly at all. but i have heard that it's easier to do it earlier. But if you're going out next thurs theres no need to stress your self out. Xxx
     
  4. Smithy1980

    Smithy1980 Well-Known Member

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    My LO is 4 1/2 months and as much as I moan on here about her not taking a bottle I dread the day I have to leave her.....so no you're not being silly hun.....id say it's perfectly natural xx


    Sent from my sparkly new 4s!!!
     
  5. Jayceesmumma

    Jayceesmumma Well-Known Member

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    It's totally normal never put pressure on yourself to leave him (and don't let anyone else either!!) or it will be so much harder!!! Only do it when u feel ready.. Maybe a couple of hours at football to try it out wouldn't be so bad? Only if ur comfortable of course. That way you can leave when u want.. Theatre on the other hand is a bit more pressure to stay.. I'd start small and work ur way up to a night out.. As little as popping to the shop for bread will help!
     
  6. Jayceesmumma

    Jayceesmumma Well-Known Member

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    Ellie still cries when I leave her at my mums!! So it is defo best to start early but when is for u to decide. If u don't feel comfortable when u leave he will sense it..x
     
  7. LaurenMM

    LaurenMM Well-Known Member

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    I understand how u feel hun I do take Angel out a lot but I like her to have the fresh air and a change of scene is good for them occasionally. I put her in a cardy, snowsuit with hood and 2 blankets and have the raincover on and I'm probably keeping her too warm to be honest. However, I do feel totally confident leaving her with OH but he saved all of his leave throughout last year and when she was born he was off from 8th Nov till the new year!! So he's been with us since day one and learned straight away what to do with her, he kind of had to really as I'd had an epidural and a general so I was bedbound for 24 hours and he had to change the first nappy etc and I had no family around. I only left her with my mum for 2 hours when I went home for Xmas and I was crying in the car but I felt we had to do it at least once or I felt we never would if u know what I mean. xx.
     
  8. Sarah13

    Sarah13 Well-Known Member

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    I hate leaving Kynon too, infact I've still never left him with anyone other than my hubby and then it's for no more than an hour or so! I couldn't bear to be away from him the first few weeks, remember we also carried them for 9 months so it's natural not to want to be separated from them x
     
  9. Hunnie

    Hunnie Well-Known Member

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    I think im the only one who actually doesn't mind leaving LO. However it was with my mum and I trust my mum more than I do my OH!
     
  10. lewisca

    lewisca Well-Known Member

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    I've only ever left Rhea for couple of hrs ! Longest was when I went to cinema ! Do leave her every mon evening for 2 hrs while I go slimming world but only been going for 4 weeks. It's not silly I have cried with each one of mine the first time I left them never left them before they were 6 weeks either. Like the girls have said u will know when your ready but start small !! Xx


     
  11. positivity :)

    positivity :) Well-Known Member

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    you're not alone hun, i have too....quite a bit :oooo:

    i've been out twice on girls nights since he was born but haven't had alcohol, both times left him with OH. also, left him for the afternoon with my mum when i got my hair done. in fact at least once a week i leave him with either my OH or my mum for a bit of time :oooo:

    do what you think is best though, for me i felt totally comfortable but we are planning on leaving him with my MIL maybe next saturday and i am feeling nervous about that!! xx
     
  12. Jayceesmumma

    Jayceesmumma Well-Known Member

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    Don't be nervous babe I'm sure he will be fine it's good for them to be cared for by other people!!
     
  13. Maria1977

    Maria1977 Well-Known Member

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    Totally natural how you're feeling hun, I didn't want to leave LO with anyone for ages. I think he was a few months old when I left him for an hour to get my hair cut and I hated it. He was 3 months old when I left him with OH for 1/2 a day to go shopping and I was so anxious during that time.

    It's easier now he's 13 months, but I still worry and miss him loads when we're apart.

    It's natural. He spend 9 months growing inside me so he's a part of me and always will be.

    :love:
     
  14. redbear

    redbear Well-Known Member

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    I have left Alice since about day two, Only with OH while i went shopping, My mum had her a few hours on the Friday night so me and OH could go for a meal and i loved it, then i went out Saturday night and left her with OH....
    Finally felt like myself again for a while and me and my OH got some time by ourselves on a Friday... it had only been a week but we needed it.
    I love her more than anything but just dont feel the need to be constantly attached... OH is more capable than me to look after her and my mum is great with her... but that's me i know some mums hate leaving LO.... hopefully this way it doesn't build into a big issue later on as it will be the norm.
    My nephew was pathetic leaving his mum when i baby sat and is a really morngy clingy kid and i think that's made me want Alice to have a bit of independence from me... i'm just starting early.

    Don't feel bad tho each to there own!! xx
     
  15. Bunnykins

    Bunnykins Well-Known Member

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    I hated leaving lo when he was newborn, but needed to when he had colic or I'd have gone insane without a break but it was only for an hour with either my mum or mil or sister, I left him first time properly when he was 4 weeks as we had tickets for a Halloween thing, so mum and dad babysat it was only 3 hrs but I missed him like crazy. My oh likes to take him into town for a coffee with his brother and nephew on a Saturday, he calls it daddydaycare time and its helped them bond and make him more confident with him, and since he turned 3 months he's gone to my mils every Friday 10-13.00 so she can have cuddles and I can tidy the house, have a proper shower and other much needed jobs, he loves it and so do I! Also we had a night out last sat for our wedding anniversary, first time since he was 4 weeks and my parents baby sat again but we just went to the local pub so we were within walking distance, turns out Lo was poorly so we came back early as he needed his mummy!

    This works for us as he's a very clingy baby when I'm around so I like him to spend time with others and he seems to love it and benefit from it, but I do miss him!! Every mummy and baby is different you can only leave them when your ready not when someone else thinks your ready!!
     
  16. Hollipops

    Hollipops Well-Known Member

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    Oh dear, I'm unusual in that I am more than happy to leave my lo with oh or my mum and have done this since week 2. I go to the gym once a week so my mum has her and I think it's good for my oh to have her so he can bond with her and she doesn't have issues being left when she gets older. I can understand why some people would find it difficult but think the longer you leave it the harder it will get.
     
  17. Lilelephant

    Lilelephant Well-Known Member

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    I wish I could be like u hollipops I don't want o to be clingy :-(


     
  18. Maria1977

    Maria1977 Well-Known Member

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    Don't worry, we've coslept since birth til Oz was 1, and still do more often than not. Didn't put him down for about 3 months and hate leaving him and Oz isn't clingy at all. He's really confident and independant. He loves nursery and is thriving.

    Only time he gets a bit clingy is when he is not feeling well or is really tired!
     
  19. Lilelephant

    Lilelephant Well-Known Member

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    Good to know hin!! Mind u I just went for a shower and O screamed the house down OH couldn't settle him and as soon as I came down and took him he settled lol OH is a bit put out lol


     
  20. MrsR

    MrsR Well-Known Member

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    I hated leaving DD when she was tiny and Sebastian. In fact I still hate leaving Sebastian! Like Maria's LO though, we co-slept with Sebastian until he turned 8/9 months old (his choice to stop) and still do when he wants to (not as often as I'd like! Lol) and he hasnt really been left with other people, except for an hour on a Sunday at church, but he's super confident and very independent. When he's tired or poorly or hurt I'm the one he comes to for comfort and he'll stick right by me or DH when he's ill but usually he's off causing havoc! Lol. You have to do what you're comfortable with doing at the end of the day.
     

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