advice needed on pregnant friend

[Hunnie]

All I seem to do is go on about friends who I struggle with or have problems with on here lol! I promise you I dont scare them all away and its only a select few that are difficult lol!


Basically I found out tonight that an ex long term friend is pregnant. Her mum was the one who told me.


Anyway we had a fall out caused by her boyfriend in about April time. She basically wanted me to be her friend during the time where her boyfriend dumped her and then ended up forgetting about me and another girl and everything we had done for her when the boyfriend decided he wanted her back. I literally did everything for her and took her out places and generally cheered her up and the fall out happened because I was angry that she was just so quick to forget about me and it upset me that our friendship obviously seemed to mean so little to her.

Her mum has forced us to speak to each other again since and Ive told her why I was upset and that I would be friends with her again but that she would have to make the effort this time after I had done in the first place ( which I thought fair enough?) but she never bothered and nothing ever came of it.

I know she doesnt have many friends other than the boyfriend as her mum has told me so I kind of feel like I should be supportive of her during the pregnancy as although Ive had people around me who have helped, none of them have been in the exact same situation as what I have and have generally been older when they had children or my age and not planning on having children for a long time and I feel like if I had had someone who had gone through everything I had then I would have coped a lot better and maybe not felt so alone.

I just dont know whether I should bother. Im half tempted not to because she's never once said anything to me since Ive been pregnant but at the same time we were childhood friends and I feel a bit guilty just leaving her.

Maybe ill just see what comes of it all and if she makes the effort herself

 

[JoJo79]

didnt wanna read and run,

Tough one to decide i think, if i were you id as myself "has my life been greatly affected by not having this friend in it"? if the answers no then i personally wouldnt make the effort! (but im a cow like that anyway lol) Or maybe give her 1 last chance to make the effort with you and show she values your friendship, if she dont bother then id call it quits

Hope this makes sense xxx

 

[Hunnie]

didnt wanna read and run,

Tough one to decide i think, if i were you id as myself "has my life been greatly affected by not having this friend in it"? if the answers no then i personally wouldnt make the effort! (but im a cow like that anyway lol) Or maybe give her 1 last chance to make the effort with you and show she values your friendship, if she dont bother then id call it quits

Hope this makes sense xxx

I think your right! My life hasnt been any worse off without her in it so I dont think Ill bother.

 

[pinkyprincess]

I wouldn't bother! Why do what her mum says? Who is she to you? The fact your questioning it says a lot!

 

[Emmsy29]

Nah i wouldnt bother. Sounds like she'll only do it again if shes withj the same bloke. U only get onew chance with me and if she was such a good mate she wouldnt of dumped u first time round x

 

[ippa]

I wouldn't bother! Friends who don't bother aren't worth it!
XxX

Sent from my HTC Wildfire S A510e using Tapatalk

 

[Hunnie]

I think the reason why I considered it all in the first place is because we have only had problems since this nob of a boyfriend came along. I got on with him at first but then it became that she had to ask his permission before we could go out anywhere. I remember a night where Id picked her up from work and we had gone out intending to have a catch up shopping trip at The Trafford Centre but he spent most of the evening ringing her phone and shouting at her and making her feel like she had to get home early so tbh the evening ended up ruined and she didnt enjoy herself because of the worry he had caused her.

I just felt like no one should be treated and spoken to like he spoke to her and I told her I thought she could do a lot better. I think thats when the issues started because I think she took in what I said but he then manipulated it round so that I ended up the wicked witch.

I think the reason why her mum got involved is because she is generally worried as her daughters gone from having loads of friends to barely speaking to anyone over the space of 2 years (the time that the idiot has been around).

Ive considered it more overnight and I dont think I will bother at all and Ill have a lot more things to keep me busy such as looking after and loving my own baby.