why is my baby so miserable

roxane 1985

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this is my second child and to be honest he is making motherhood miserable for me - before anyone says no i dont have postnatal depression.

my son is almost 9 months old but all he does is whinge,

he was diagnosed at a few week with reflux but has been having daily treatment.

he moans if i put him on the floor, in his walker, in his highchair,in his bed,if i walk out the room- all quickly move up to screaming with tears and doesnt always calm down if i pick him up. he has 3 solid meals a day and i try and give him bottle feeds in between but most of the time he wont take them.

he barely naps, he just wont stay asleep and moans alot in his sleep and wakes for a bottle still

he has only had 1 or 2 weeks where he has slept through and not moaned in his sleep, he then wakes anywhere between 5.30 am and 7.30 am

its stopping me being a mom to my 4 yr old who either bares the brunt of me being tired or gets left out cus im dealing with a grumpy baby who is only happy when im playing with him or feeding him.

cant take anymore, ive been up since 7.20am, i went to bed at 10.30pm and he wkoe straight away (doesnt matter how quiet i am he wakes up as soon as ilie in bed), its3am and he is only just starting to nod off in his puschair.

dunno what to do i feel my time as a mother is crap and wasted
 
Oh Hun, firstly sending you lots of :hugs:!

I don't know what to suggest really. Is there anything he likes to do? Maybe try get him out in the fresh air as much as possible?

I sort of feel your pain. Josh doesn't like being put down at the moment either. The only time he is happy is when he is in his jumperoo. But I am lucky that he sleeps at night.

I really hope things get easier quickly and you can start to enjoy motherhood again.xx
 
So sorry you're feeling like this :(

Could you ask your HV for adcice? Cause that doesn't seem normal to me? Perhaps there's something else going on? Worth asking I think. And yeah trying to get him outdoors doing things in the fresh air or other activities indoors like thosde indoor soft play areas, swimming, baby groups etc??

Big hugs xxx
 
I can only echo what the others have said, do stuff to wear him out and stimulate him and maybe that'll help with the sleep. Do you follow a bedtime routine? Big hugs xx
 
So sorry things r crap at the mo hun! I am no expert but it does seem that something nay b bothering him to b that unhappy all the time and struggle sleeping- mayb he needs an increased dose of his reflux meds? Don't they tend to start them pb a really low dose? Or could he have an intolerance to something he's eating? I know not all hv and gp's r v helpful but I think u need to push for some help on this one- u need to have a happy family again! *big hug* xx
 
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thanks all, he doesnt seemed to be interested in anything really

as for HV no way am i speaking to her she is vile, she tried to convince me i had PD and needed parenting classes , that i had mental health issues,and alsorts. i was just tired and couldnt think straight as i was now dealing with two children
 
Has he always been like this or is it a new thing? They go through developmental leaps which can make them grumpy as they can do what they want to. I know it doesn't help but K has never slept through, not once and wakes every 2 hours as well so know how you feel but have nothing to suggest as nothing has worked for me either.
Have you tried creating 'treasure baskets' for him? I put a thread on here the other day with things to do that might keep his interest and stimulate him. You basically collect random things from around the house and put them in a basket but only give the basket for a limited time once a day when you need 5 minutes to keep him occupied.
http://www.pregnancyforum.co.uk/baby-toddler/246242-free-very-cheap-toy-play-ideas-thread.html
 
He'll be on the move soon Roxane that should ware him out will also help you get on with things hopefully. Do no toys occupy him on his own at all?
 
just an idea but have u thought it could be separation anxiety, as in he gets upset when u leave the room - does he ever go to any other peoples house without u, i.e ur parents, inlaws etc?? if so is he grumpy then?
xxx
 
Has he always been like this or is it a new thing? They go through developmental leaps which can make them grumpy as they can do what they want to. I know it doesn't help but K has never slept through, not once and wakes every 2 hours as well so know how you feel but have nothing to suggest as nothing has worked for me either.
Have you tried creating 'treasure baskets' for him? I put a thread on here the other day with things to do that might keep his interest and stimulate him. You basically collect random things from around the house and put them in a basket but only give the basket for a limited time once a day when you need 5 minutes to keep him occupied.
http://www.pregnancyforum.co.uk/baby-toddler/246242-free-very-cheap-toy-play-ideas-thread.html


he was like it when he was new born for a few weeks and they found out he hasacid reflux, he wasput on meds and still on it and heseemed ok for a while now he hasgone back the way he is
 
He'll be on the move soon Roxane that should ware him out will also help you get on with things hopefully. Do no toys occupy him on his own at all?


he cant sit up yet really,well hecan for about 30 secs then just flops down again, he has just started moving in his walker. toys keep him occupied for about 2 mins then he starts moaning and shouting at them
 
just an idea but have u thought it could be separation anxiety, as in he gets upset when u leave the room - does he ever go to any other peoples house without u, i.e ur parents, inlaws etc?? if so is he grumpy then?
xxx

he gets upset even if im in the room. no nobody has him they are too busy and he is so demanding unlike my daughter was. he just wants someone to constantlyplay with him as soon as they stop he goes moody again
 
First of all massive hugs, because I do emphasize with a lot of what you've just said.

So my story is v similar. Ds screamed a lot, took ages to go to sleep from about week 2 every nap, woke screaming. Hv and doc thought I was a neurotic first time mum when I was just a sleep.deprived mum. Everyone said reflux for us too, but it was liking having a colicy baby 24/7. Eventually we worked out it was food ibtolerances from my milk, he could not tolerate dairy, soya amongst other things. I'm not saying thats necessarily why your son is this way but it maybe something you should discuss with your doc or hv (exclusion of food groups must always be done under medical advice).

Also try and get a kid's free break, even if it's for 2 hours by yourself, it's amazing what some you time will do x

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For the couple of weeks before my lo learnt to crawl she was really whingy and frustrated as well. Once she learnt to get around she has gone back to her lovely sunny self again! i hope its a phase for you, its desperate listening to them whinge sometimes!!
 
does your older daughter play with him much?

I remember when we had my neice come to stay and she played with her on the floor next to me while i was getting ready and it was bliss! Although i'm sure its very different when its every day.

Are there any activities they can both be involved in, like reading or something, S loves the books with the buttons on the edge that you can press and they make animal noises and things.
 
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I do feel for you,.its quite hard to deal with a baby with reflux. I have one who is intolerant to dairy too.
I dont mean it in a bad way, but have they said anything about him not being able to sit up? Does he meet all other milestones?

It can be just a phase, teething, development, separation anxiety, you name it.
Big hug to you, maybe demand to.see a padeatrician if it continues?

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