which routine do you follow?

[annem]

hi, i've just started my LO on Gina Ford's routine. Its not going great as at 4am she wants to get up!!

have you all made your own routine or do you use a rough model or follow one to the letter?

xx

 

[Becky]

We've always followed our own rules and routines which we've come up with based on a combination of 3 things: 1) our opinions, 2)what we've read and 3) advice from friends and family.

The main thing is that whatever you do, be consistent. It might take a few goes of being consistent before your LO figures out that you mean business but they will figure it out.

When our Lucy was waking in the night I couldn't just leave her but we agreed on a rule of no interaction, if she was waking from thirst or nappy or whatever we would go in, see to her but no talking and no prolonged cuddling except enough to settle her back down. We also tried to keep lights off as much as possible to make it clear that it wasn't time to get up.

She still wakes in the night sometimes now but its usually for a drink which we're trying to get her to either get her drink herself (and go to the potty too if she needs) or not need the drink. We haven't quite figured it out yet. Lol.

 

[mrs_tommo22]

Ive always made my own up - and they have worked out fine for both my kids.

Its quite a laid back routine but they do have to be in bed at the same time each night.

 

[weenik]

I've never followed any set routines, I just do what I think is best. Personally I could never have left Dylan to cry, I think that's cruel - I always thought that if he cried it was for a reason (a cuddle for me is a good enough reason to go to him). It's all down to personal opinion though, but Dylan settled into his own routine from about 8 weeks and still goes to bed at the same time now. Do what you feel is best x

 

[rachie29]

we follow our own routine which Holly established herself. The only thing we have always done is bedtime, same time every day.

 

[poppy160]

At the moment, we're trying out a rough routine for bedtime..lavender bath at 8pm, massage and skin to skin/feed with low lights, then swaddled and down for the night at 9:30pm. Although she will happily lie there til we come to bed. She will wake at 5/5:30am for a feed then straight back to sleep.

 

[Red_Fairy]

with hannah she seemed to find her own routine at about 3 months old. And she changes it now and then (she used to go to bed at 8pm before xmas but sinse then she now wants to go to bed at 7pm)

Because of my experience with hannah im happy to wait to see if emily finds her own one this time round.

 

[Redshoes]

I've always let Isaac decide what works best for him, no-one knows him better than himself. When he got to about 5months I stepped in and started to offer a bedtime, as we previously co-slept but I no longer wanted to go to bed at 6-7pm He's always stayed in his cot until 5-6am though, and goes to bed at 6-7pm, so I think we made a good team. That's not to say he sleeps through everynight or never ends up in bed with us but it works for us

 

[annem]

i think i'll just have to follow her lead then!! i think the main thing is having her in bed by 7 or all hell breaks lose as she fights it when she tired. We are doing ok now getting her to bed at 7pm and sleep feeding her at 11pm and 2am its just in the days for her naps i worry about as she gets upset if she does not sleep. Also she has small feeds and i was told to try and feed her water between feeds soshe just had 6 big feeds a day but i can't do it as feelbad!!

 

[Redshoes]

I never gave Isaac water, I just gave him his boob or bottle when he wanted it at that age personally. I think its important you do what you feel is best for her, your her Mummy and have to do it 24/7, you need to feel happy and relaxed about it, it needs to work for your lifestyle

Isaac's terrible when he's tired, its so important he naps or he's soooooo grumpy But he'd have never gone to bed at 7pm like that at 2 1/2 months, and I never dream fed him, so it sounds like she's doing extremely well to me, very well done, feel happy about what you've both already acheived, sounds real nice to me Very best wishes

 

[lauramumof2]

The main thing is that whatever you do, be consistent. It might take a few goes of being consistent before your LO figures out that you mean business but they will figure it out.
yet. Lol.

definately. A routine is the backbone of a good day. I also swear by the bath, bottle bed routine at night. I feel lost without a routine so the kids must be the same. At first it seems fruitless but it starts to work then you see it working and you are proud because you have done it.

 

[Full of hope!]

I think we are starting to get into a routine now We get Jacob ready for bed around 7, he has a bottle then we take him up to bed after that. He settles himself and falls asleep. He will normally wake for a feed between 11 and 12 then again around 3. He's normally awake around 6am so I bring him into our bed for cuddles and he sometimes falls asleep again!

During the day he will have a couple of half hour sleeps and a long 2 to 3 hour sleep, in the moring if we're out or in the afternoon if we're at home

We haven't really decided this will be his routine it's just sort of happened, we've followed his lead if you know what I mean!

 

[ella]

I tried a routine - but I was too laid back and not consistant so now I just follow his lead - he is pretty laid back himself and only cries when he wants something so its going pretty well

 

[lisa&alex]

annem this isnt a pop at you at all -

i think gina ford's concept is really outdated and cruel obviously if you take little bits of her ideas that arnt so strict then fine, i just think its complete nonsence, and goes against natural instinct, a breastfed baby doesnt feed every 4 hrs on the hour, it feeds when it wants to.and breasts were made for babies. babies need mummy cuddles they need eye contact and interaction. and if they are crying its for a reason.

if you want routeen then shop around babies need consistency for a routeen.. not neglect

good luck with it, edward isnt in a routeen yet, but we are going to start 7pm bed times this week coz hes getting ratty.

 

[annem]

annem this isnt a pop at you at all -

i think gina ford's concept is really outdated and cruel obviously if you take little bits of her ideas that arnt so strict then fine, i just think its complete nonsence, and goes against natural instinct, a breastfed baby doesnt feed every 4 hrs on the hour, it feeds when it wants to.and breasts were made for babies. babies need mummy cuddles they need eye contact and interaction. and if they are crying its for a reason.

if you want routeen then shop around babies need consistency for a routeen.. not neglect

good luck with it, edward isnt in a routeen yet, but we are going to start 7pm bed times this week coz hes getting ratty.

Yeah i've just been using it as a basic model and has really saved me. Just the routine. I;d never let a baby cry as thats just cruel, i never knew she said to do that!!

its working great for me as she was getting upset at night from being so tired but now she sleeps from 7pm so she s a happier baby. I don't feel i'm neglecting her in any way as i was told by the HV i was prob over feeding her as she was the size of a 10week baby at 4weeks and she is still very big and me having the evenings without her crying makes us have more fun and happiness in the day! TBH she's happier with the routine than without it as i guess she's never too sleepy fighting it, never over feed or hungry and gets a happy mummy.


hope all is going well with edward's bedtime!

 

[angelfairy]

We started off with no routine whatsoever as I was breastfeeding on demand till she was around 3 months old, after that though I got a book called baby secrets by a lady called Jo Tantum and followed the routine she recommends in her book.

It was so much easier to follow than Gina ( I failed terribly with Gina and cried all the time too because I found it too harsh) and I found that my girl loved the routine too.

Good luck

xXx

 

[LucyBee]

annem this isnt a pop at you at all -

i think gina ford's concept is really outdated and cruel obviously if you take little bits of her ideas that arnt so strict then fine, i just think its complete nonsence, and goes against natural instinct, a breastfed baby doesnt feed every 4 hrs on the hour, it feeds when it wants to.and breasts were made for babies. babies need mummy cuddles they need eye contact and interaction. and if they are crying its for a reason.

if you want routeen then shop around babies need consistency for a routeen.. not neglect

good luck with it, edward isnt in a routeen yet, but we are going to start 7pm bed times this week coz hes getting ratty.

Sorry but that's just not the case and for starters I don't think we're allowed to discuss her on here for legal reasons.

However...she is not 'complete nonsense' and it's outrageous that you would link her methods with 'neglect'.

I have read all her books and found them to be incredibly helpful. She never, ever advocates neglect. She suggests a structured routine which works for some babies and doesn't for others. You read her books, you make your choice.

She is a huge supporter of breast-feeding and cuddles. She never ever suggests denying your baby love and contact. The only time she suggests avoiding eye contact is for the bedtime feed and at nights to avoid over-stimulation.

Being a Mummy is tough and there are so many books and so many people offering advice that I just think it's best to always be supportive of anyone who is trying a method of parenting and not to tell them it's a complete nonsense especially when what you're saying is just not true!