Vomiting at bedtime and when nervous

[Georgie2010]

Help!! I am putting this in the heath forum as I am unsure if what my little girl has is behavioural or a health issue. My daughter is 19 months, has never been a good sleeper since birth (2-3 hrs on the trot, max) Is very highly strung and never has many daytime naps - impossible to get her to go down for more than about an hour half and that is a fight. She goes in her cot - regulaly at 8-9pm (we live in Spain and it is hotter here) It takes her at least 45 mins to settle. The main issue being if I leave her on her own (she can't see me sat in the doorway) she vomits immediately. I can't even have a quick wee. She also does the same thing in the day if I leave her in the lounge and hang the washing on the terrace (she can see me throught the window) or if I leave her in the playpen and go into another room. It doesn't always happen in the day, but she will ALWAYS vomit at night. If she is cleaned up and left again (when we tried the cry it out method) she will vomit repeatedly until she is very distressed. We can't leave her with my parents, even though she spends every morning with my Mum while I work. Mums says I spoil her and that it is my own fault, but she had colic from birth until 4 months and then the vomiting started. I have HAD to be near her in her cot. Does anyone have a solution? It cannot take 2 -3 hours every evening to settle my child. This is NOT normal. After she is sick she is so upset I have to lie her on our bed until she drops off (very quickly). I don't consider myself a pushover, neither a cruel person. I am a regular authopritatiove parent who is struggling to deal with an ongoing, worsening issue. I have an appointment with the doctor today but they never seem to helpmuch over here. Anyone any advicce or experience? Many thanks in advance, from a desperate mother in the sweating heat (sorry!)

 

[wifeywifey]

Hi I dont have any advise really. It does sound like a behavioural issue im guessing when she was younger and was sick you would fuss (as any good mother does) and she has learned that it gets what she wants and does it on purpose. When she does it have you tried cleaning her up but dont comfort her or talk to her and just putting her back. If she doesnt get positive attention it might help break the cycle you also say she wont nap in the day could you maybe try pushing to get her to nap in the day as you say she isnt always sick and might be a good place to start to reach her to go down without the fuss. I wouldnt blame yourself I have been lucky and not had colic with my kids but from reading on here you do what you can to help your child. I hope doctor can help it cant be easy. X

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[Georgie2010]

Hi, yes, maybe I need to not fuss so much after the vomiting, its just that she is so upset after, mumbling and very tired. Where she has always vomited from such an early age when left to settle in her cot, (from 6months) This led me to try the sleep training method when you sit in a chair near the cot and gradually withdraw. The problem is, I never got to get the chair out the doorway without the vomiting starting! Doesn't help I have not slept the night through since October 2010 either and I am losing it!! My mum said I have made a rod for my own back and should just put her down and let her get on with it. Worth noting that my parents babysitted once from 8pm-11pm. They closed the door on her 3 times and she was sick on each occasion and they had to change the sheets and her 3 times. I arrived home to 3 washing machine loads & my daughter zonked out exhausted with her hair full of dried sick. Either us babies were very well behaved in the 70's or our parents were unusually cruel!!

 

[wifeywifey]

I couldnt leave my kids to cry either I dont think on the long term it does any good. I think when we were younger there wasnt so many "rules" so parents did whatever they thought worked. Wish I could help x

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[tinks77]

Not sure which one it could be tbh but if it is behavioural maybe try just cleaning her up in silence for a few days, don't pay her any attention and just clean up and put back down again.
Maybe she'll be calmer in a few days and if not maybe its a health thing (anxiety) have you seen a dr about it yet?