urghh dont know whats going on

[carli91]

Me and OH have a 19 week old lb together. We have been together just over 2 years and for the past 4/5 weeks something just doesn't feel right and I cant quite put my finger on it. I love him so so much but I find myself constantly picking fights with him over silly little things. I did tell him when we get together that I can be a moody cow and if I come looking for an argument over something stupid to just ignore me and tell me to grow up which he has done sincr we got together but for the last 4/5 him ignoring me when I do pick an argument doesn't work because I then get pissed off that he's ignoring me which makes things worse and results in me going to bed and crying myself to slleep and then OH apologising in the morning when he hasn't even done anything wrong. I dont even know where im going with the post or why im even posting it. I dont even feel better after writting about it. Urghh wtf is wrong with me seriously my OH deserves a fucking medal for putting up with me I'm a crank!

 

[mylullaby]

Does he help you with the baby? Do you feel like he could do more? It's great when we can own up to our faults, but it can't ALL be about you being a cranky/miserable/unreasonable cow or whatever. You've had a baby. You're sleep deprived and your whole world has changed. I'm making a huge assumption here, but if you're the one doing all the leg work (lots of mums can find themselves in that position) then it's not surprising that you might throw a wobbler from time to time. Is there anything else he could be doing to help you? With the baby or around the house?

 

[carli91]

He's fantastic with baby and it definitely nothing to do with being sleep deprived. LO sleeps 8pm-7am and has done since 6 week's old. OH works 5 days a week and it's all day on the days he works then on his 2 day's off are sunday and Tuesday. Sunday we are at his mum's all day because thats the only day she sees LO and Tuesday we spend all day cleaning the house because I don't get time to do much around the house when im on my own with LO. Maybe we don't spend enough time together doing things?

 

[ClimbingRose]

When he apologises in the morning, do you tell him hes not at fault and you were being unreasonable? It sounds like if you're not sure why you feel this way, there is something underlying that you're not aware of yet. Perhaps you are suffering from mild post natal depression which is making you cranky.
Or perhaps it is down to your new lifestyle, what type of things did you do before you LO came along? If you are currently a stay at home mum full time, maybe you're starting to feel a bit isolated or cabin fever-y? Its worth changing your routine a bit and seeing if that helps. I find I get incredibly cranky with the OH if I havent been out enough and got fresha air etc, and also if we havent had sex in a while! I never realise it until we dtd and suddenly i feel much better haha. It could be anything or a mix of things, just try changing little things in your routine and see if any of them make you feel less agitated. xx

 

[mylullaby]

Hmm... I would DEFINITELY be cranky if I had to spend all day every Sunday with MIL! Ha! Does it have to be all day? What about walks in the park - just you two and the baby (ok, maybe not while the parks are all flooded and full of storm-damaged tree debris, but you get the idea) - sounds like you don't really relax as a family. Just you two and the baby. A few more days out/walks/swimming baths or something? Or maybe you'll have a damn good shag and realise that's where your crankiness had come from?

 

[carli91]

I always tell him it's not his fault in the morning and then I apologise for being a crank and thankfully he doesn't take it personal, he's got the patience of a saint thankfully most men wouldn't put up with me but I know if I dont stop it he's going to flip one day. It's definitely not pnd because ive been like this for years and it's deffo not because I need a good shag, we have one every night (we both have very high sex drives) maybe its just me being a bitch haha I dont know :/ xx

 

[Mum2betash]

Perhaps just having a baby has made you more grumpy. I certainly am!! haha. No reason for it at all, I just feel miserable and grumpy sometimes. xx

 

[Mum2Many]

It sounds like hormones. My DH and I never argue more than the few weeks after a new baby has been born... I mean, seriously bicker. I am so moody and everything upsets me.

Baby may be 19 weeks old now, but it's all still new. It's like moving house, or starting a new job, or getting married. It puts stress on even when you don't realise you're stressed and that causes crankiness.

I'm sure it'll settle down soon.