Update on me (again... bored yet?)

[Simoneh00]

Had my appointment at the daybed unit again today.
Came in and waited for quite a bit, had a wee on request then got strapped up to the BP monitor and the straps on for bubs heart.
My BP is up slightly but midwife seemed to understand that I just freak out in hospitals. My little man's heart rate is great. Was so sweet actually, I had a bit of a laughing fit at my mum and his heart rate went up and the midwife said he was enjoying me laughing
So back in on Tuesday when I'll have the little man's heart rate monitored again and bloods / paper work done for my section
I'm still absolutely gutted and ridiculously and irrationally terrified but I want my little man out safe. I keep telling myself I can do it but this voice is just screaming at me to ask to go under general as my fear of another spinal block is just sooo bad! I'm gonna hopefully speak to a consultant on Tuesday and explain how I'm feeling and see what they suggest.

Anyway, sorry if I'm boring you all with these updates, it's just nice to write down everything that's happening

Hope everyone else is doing ok

 

[Sam's Mum]

Nope....never going to get bored!

Glad you and your little man are doing ok So sweet his heart rate going up when you were laughing

Hope you manage to speak to someone who can help you worry less about the spinal block on Tuesday so you wouldn't need the general x

 

[Simoneh00]

I keep telling myself that a spinal is so much safer for my little man. I think the fear of the numbness had gotten so bad cause of mum's stroke. Watching her be completely numb and having no idea when she'd be able to feel that side again. Plus I read a birth story where someone went completely numb all over I would actually die from an anxiety attack!
I'm wondering if I could maybe be sedated before the spinal goes in?

I feel like such a big baby

 

[Sam's Mum]

I had an epidural with Toby because I couldn't even move on the bed because of my sciatica and it was fine - any complications are so rare, but I do think it would help if you could have a proper chat with a consultant or even an anaesthetist before x

 

[Simoneh00]

Maybe someone should slip me a couple of valium on the walk round to theatre

 

[ria__x]

aww i wish a had a nice midwife like your one, how sweet your LO's heart rate goes up when you laugh!!! hehe. i never get bored of reading your updates either, this is the most exciting part of your pregnancy!

 

[Simoneh00]

I'm just scaring myself silly here! Google is the pregnant lady's enemy!!!
I'm soo pissed at myself for being this nervous!!! The most important thing here is that my son is born safe and healthy and I just can't seem to get my head under control. I'm actually really disappointed in myself right now

 

[lauren86]

stay away from google! It's an evil machine i'm not bored either, writing updates keeps your mind at rest because everyone is so lovely on pf! X

 

[Simoneh00]

I agree everyone is sooooo lovely here! I don't know if I'd have coped without it this pregnancy!

 

[Dragonfly Fi]

I think i would be much the same, the idea of someone messing with my spine is a bit much

Perhaps they could sedate you a wee bit without hurting the baby?

Will be thinking of you sweetie xx

 

[Simoneh00]

I think i would be much the same, the idea of someone messing with my spine is a bit much

Perhaps they could sedate you a wee bit without hurting the baby?

Will be thinking of you sweetie xx

I got offered a little sedative to help me sleep the night before I had Eva as I was freaking out that my OH at the time had to leave me so I'm assuming there might one that's safe.

I just can't stop going over and over last time. The click in my spine then the rush of numbness and que me immediately freaking the hell right out and thinking I'd never be able to move my legs again

I know I'm being silly and acting ridiculous as well
My dad is going to have to literally drag me into the car then carry me into the hospital on Friday cause I'm gonna be acting like an idiot

 

[Rosie's Mummy]

I can understand how you feel after my section although I was so out of it! I hope you get some reassurance and you start to feel more confident about not needing a general

 

[titch]

I can totally understand how you feel. Sams Mum is right, you should definately talk to someone about your fears, its amazing how just saying things aloud can help you to feel a bit better. Youre gonna do just fine tho hun, and you'll have your baby safe and sound in your arms very soon

 

[Dragonfly Fi]

They really should encorperate some sort of hypnosis, hypnotheraphy thing with the spinal, get people really, really calm because it must be so scary!

you will be fine though honey, it will probably be much much easier now you know what to expect x

 

[Simoneh00]

I think things always seem worse when you're up at silly o'clock on your own letting yourself get worked up! I'm still super nervous this morning but can actually breathe now. Ended up haveing a hug with Eva at like 4am to calm myself down
You can all laugh when I write my birth story about how lovely an experience it was haha!