TTC second child questions

[firstfreakout]

Hi everyone. It's been a while since I've been on here!

I had my first child in September 2017, and he was a surprise (we weren't actively preventing but he wasn't planned...) After a hell of a delivery and post-partum experience, my partner and I have decided to try for a second child now.

Long story short, he's always wanted a 2 year age gap between first and second children, whereas I wanted a slightly bigger gap. However since having my boy I've decided to take a few years off work (they do career breaks where they hold my job for me!) to raise him and do the SAHM thing.

I've been really, really broody the last month or so and have now changed my mind and think that a smaller age gap would be better; I can do the SAHM for a few years and then go back to my career, rather than stopping and starting training and career progression options. I'll be 28 and he'll be 32 in December, so I'd much rather take the time off work now so I can get started on my long term career plans.

Being this is my first time actively making the decision to try and get pregnant, I had a few questions for you guys!

Firstly, how did you know (or did you know) you were ready for #2?
and how long did it take to conceive them?

I believe I'm ovulating today and we've had sex all through this fertile window, including this morning, and now I'm finding myself getting really excited.

That's got to be a good sign, right?! Or am I actually bonkers?!

 

[Kitana]

I'm TTC number two as well! My DD was born end of May and we wanted at least a 2 year gap so that when the second child is born, I will be able to stay at home for approximately 5 to 6 months, then the oldest will start kindergarten and the youngest can take her place at the childminder's. Not only that but my OH said it's scientifically proven that's it's better to have at least 2 year gap. Haha I don't know if that is true!
I'm 7DPO and have some very positive signs so I'm crossing my fingers!

Hopefully you will get you bfp soon!!! Good luck!x

 

[Shepherdess]

I always wanted quite a big gap between my children, I wanted to be able to focus on each one for a while and really spend time doing things with them one on one. I also had a tough time with post natal anxiety following a traumatic labour so I wasn't ready for now for ages. In the end it just got to the point I knew I was ready. And I fell first month 2nd time round (took 3 months first time). I now have a 3 year old and a 5 week old

 

[Laura butchers]

The age gap between my will be 3yrs 4 months.
I didnt want a small gap between them so i could enjoy my son and make sure that ive done everthing i can to give him all my attention. Not by spoiling him! But i enjoy the precious moments like bed time stories and cuddles before he goes to sleep. Now that he asked for specific books and joins in where he can really makes these moments special. I think its important that all children have their parents time as much as possible.
Now that hes at the age where he doesnt need my full attention 24hrs a day it was just right that we have another one. He needs someone to play with now. And although he has friends and family i just know its time.

I think when you know you know. X

 

[DeeDeeAbi]

I've got a bang on 2 year gap and it's been bloody hard!! But now, after 8 months, I'm starting to see a little friendship blossoming and it's actually getting easier with them both being more independent. I just have this hope that they'll be closer when they're older. I make sure both get my full attention, usually when one is napping or I'll leave one with husband for a couple of hours on s weekend and I think that's been really good for me. every gap has its pros and cons, but I agree that you just know. Also, obviously I hope you have no issues but with no guarantees you just can't totally plan it can you- think that whatever your gap is is what's meant to be Good luck XX

 

[Princess81]

My son is 6 and now we are ttc. I’ve been ready since he was about 4 but needed to be sensible with my career and also we wanted to get married first- which we have just done x

 

[EmmaN27]

My daughter is now 6 and i'm ttc my 2nd (with new partner). My partner is an amazing dad to his 2 daughters, the most hands on dad i've ever seen, we now feel it is time to have a child together as our relationship is so solid and happy and our girls will also love it. x

 

[firstfreakout]

Thanks for replying with your experiences

I've found that I'm actually really excited about TTC, more so than I thought I would be. I keep checking my fertility apps and waiting for the days to pass. I'm also really enjoying our sex life for the first time in a while, as I was on some medication before that was clearly affecting it.

I think that if I'm feeling this okay and comfortable with it all then it must be a sign that we're ready on some level. And I guess what will be, will be!