My husband has a little boy from a previous relationship aged 7 (I have two children age 13 and 15 from my ex husband). 10 years ago we were together as a couple (we have known each other all our lives as he was the boy next door), our relationship ended as I was under alot of stress nursing my mum through terminal cancer. We went our separate ways and he met her and they had a child together. They never lived together but he has been an attentive dad all these years-paying maintenance on time and seeing his son 3 times a week. I continued with my life as a single parent and we met up again a few years ago-and now we are married. I have never met his son as at the moment we live 300 miles away (but moving back home to Cornwall next week). Even though my husband moved up here he has managed to see his son regularly and skype calls him 3 times a week.
Over the last 7 years she has been very protective of their son and there has been many issues (before I came back into my husbands life) which are too numerous to write here, but my husband has had to keep a diary log of everything that's happened. However whilst he has been back in my life we have had to endure many things-not just my husband but me. We started to receive silent phone calls, sometimes up to 15 a night we had them traced and found out it was from her mobile. I started to get bombarded with fake FB profiles the content either being a 'man' trying to flirt with me, or someone claiming to be her friend and warning me off. We got the IP address traced and found out it was her. My husband explained he would get the police involved and all that stopped.
His son is very manipulated by her and when my husband skypes he notices that his son looks off camera before he answers questions and often comes out with odd things that a 7 year old would not know to answer. Things like 'mummy loves you daddy' etc. His son has pictures of his mum and dad framed in his bedroom of them together (when they were together), its all very weird. She is on his FB and constantly posts messages supposedly from his son, even down to making her son pose with shop bought jam tarts (taking them out of the oven with oven gloves and all) after i posted a picture of my kids baking and tagged my husband. Its really quite twisted and sinister in some ways. When things dont go her way, or she see's something on FB that she doesnt like she gets their son to say he 'needs a break from seeing daddy'. Or she writes to him tells him their son wants to change his surname and so it goes on and on.
After a while my husband took her off FB because of all the posts and inuendo's he was receiving from her and she used the excuse that his son didn't want to see him because he couldnt see his dads FB anymore-he is 7!!!
So anyway, the time has come for us to move back home, and my husband wanted to arrange a day out for us all so his son could meet me and my two. We realised it may be awkward so i offered to meet her in town for a coffee, just the two of us, so she could get to know me before her son meets me. I have been a single parent and in a similar situation with my ex husband and his partner-however she enriched my children's life and still does. So I dont see the problem! I can only think that she is jealous or so possessive over her son that she wont allow him to meet me.
I dont want to be his mummy, I have my own two and one on the way! This is breaking my husbands heart, but he has resolved to not take it from her anymore as before he would tip toe around her just so he could get to see his son. He is still keeping a log of everything that happens.
I suppose I am wondering if anyone has been through this? I think the right next step is for my husband to seek mediation, as he is sure the next step she will take when we move home will be to stop access again.
Its sad because he has a half brother/sister on the way and he will miss out on so much if his mother continues to manipulate him
Over the last 7 years she has been very protective of their son and there has been many issues (before I came back into my husbands life) which are too numerous to write here, but my husband has had to keep a diary log of everything that's happened. However whilst he has been back in my life we have had to endure many things-not just my husband but me. We started to receive silent phone calls, sometimes up to 15 a night we had them traced and found out it was from her mobile. I started to get bombarded with fake FB profiles the content either being a 'man' trying to flirt with me, or someone claiming to be her friend and warning me off. We got the IP address traced and found out it was her. My husband explained he would get the police involved and all that stopped.
His son is very manipulated by her and when my husband skypes he notices that his son looks off camera before he answers questions and often comes out with odd things that a 7 year old would not know to answer. Things like 'mummy loves you daddy' etc. His son has pictures of his mum and dad framed in his bedroom of them together (when they were together), its all very weird. She is on his FB and constantly posts messages supposedly from his son, even down to making her son pose with shop bought jam tarts (taking them out of the oven with oven gloves and all) after i posted a picture of my kids baking and tagged my husband. Its really quite twisted and sinister in some ways. When things dont go her way, or she see's something on FB that she doesnt like she gets their son to say he 'needs a break from seeing daddy'. Or she writes to him tells him their son wants to change his surname and so it goes on and on.
After a while my husband took her off FB because of all the posts and inuendo's he was receiving from her and she used the excuse that his son didn't want to see him because he couldnt see his dads FB anymore-he is 7!!!
So anyway, the time has come for us to move back home, and my husband wanted to arrange a day out for us all so his son could meet me and my two. We realised it may be awkward so i offered to meet her in town for a coffee, just the two of us, so she could get to know me before her son meets me. I have been a single parent and in a similar situation with my ex husband and his partner-however she enriched my children's life and still does. So I dont see the problem! I can only think that she is jealous or so possessive over her son that she wont allow him to meet me.
I dont want to be his mummy, I have my own two and one on the way! This is breaking my husbands heart, but he has resolved to not take it from her anymore as before he would tip toe around her just so he could get to see his son. He is still keeping a log of everything that happens.
I suppose I am wondering if anyone has been through this? I think the right next step is for my husband to seek mediation, as he is sure the next step she will take when we move home will be to stop access again.
Its sad because he has a half brother/sister on the way and he will miss out on so much if his mother continues to manipulate him
