This Is It!!

[K X]

Spoke to my boss today, and I am returning to work on the 6th June. I am gutted to be leaving Rebeca at four months old, but financially we couldn't cope any longer. We aren't entitled to any tax credits, which I was shocked about, so mum is watching Rebecca 2 days per week and she will be in nursery for 3 full days per week, and that is costing us £450 a month with no help from the Tax Credit system. Ouch! It's terrible, I wished we had no debt or mortgage then we would of been okay.

I keep reassuring myself that it's to give Rebecca a good life, but I feel terrible. I will be missing out on so much. But I have made sure she is in a reputable nursery (however expensive it is) but nothing is the same as having your mummy around.

 

[lauramumof2]

I dont understand how you cant be entitled to any tax credits. Would you not even be able to go back part time and see if you would get any then.
Your other half must make a lot of money, otherwise there is something wrong with the way they have calculated it.
Im wonder about some of these things??

Let me know how you get on.

 

Hi hunnie this was going to be my only option too, but me and DF have decided that I will stay at home with Damien and just cut our non-priority debts down (loans, hire purchase, overdrafts, etc, not priority debts like mortgage, council tax, etc). It might effect our credit rating for 5 years (after which it gets cleared and you start afresh), but I'd rather do that than have someone else look after my baby.
Is this an option you could look into? Just ask if you want some more advice on it and I'll do my very best to help you. xxx

 

[Rosieroo]

Lauramum - We get the child tax credit thing that goes down to about £12.50 a week when Ella is 1 (currently just under £20 a week). But we don't get working tax credit. Even if I went back to work we wouldn't get it as DH earns over £14 or £15k which they reckon is the cutoff point. However he doesn't earn very much in relation to our outgoings (mortgage etc). It is a pita.

 

[melhoney]

hmmm, same here really!
my husband and I work in a school, him as ICT technician, and me as teacher with responsabilities, and we don't qualify for any!! just above!

I wanted to stay with Maheen longer than the 26 weeks maternity leave but can't afford it really, with our mortgage! I am gonna have to find a day nursery around where I work (1 hour commuting from home) and in London, Childcare is really expensive! £450 a month would be great! for us, it's gonna be closer to £800!!!!! But again, no choice! no day nursery opens at 60 am, do they!

really tough!
mel xx

 

[K X]

Well me and OH work as Anti-social behaviour Investigators for our local Council, we are on £21 each, which sounds a lot, but per month we clear 2500 between us, and pay out 1600 on loans, credit cards and finance (car), he has an overdraft of 700 which is maxed out, and mines is 400 maxed out. Then there is the mortgage and bills on top of that, and nursery fees, and travelling expences-100 each per month for train pass! So we are left in deficit each month. That's before we eat or clothe Becks!

Tax Credit wise, we get 30 a month until she is 1, then nothing.

Melhoney, if we had to put Rebecca in nursery 5 days a week our bill would be 1k per month, thank god for my mum!!

sami thanks for your kind reply. Hope you are keeping well.xx

 

[beanie]

I'm going back June 16th - seems to be coming round too quickly. Part of me is excited about returning but I know it will be horrible too. My friend is looking after Seren for me as she does nannying so I feel better knowing that someone I know and trust will have Seren.

 

[melhoney]

I understand Beanie, my problem is I know noone in this country! And I think I will be more able to trust an institution like day nurseries than individuals...But I'll have to pay the price!
My Mil is coming over to help for 4 months, from September till Jan, so we will save a bit, but after that, it will be tough!

we haven't got much choice have we: either we miss out on our children's development and feel awful , or we saty with them, but can't pay the bill and raise them properly! we can never win!
K X, I completely understand where you come from!
Mel xx

 

[beanie]

I understand Beanie, my problem is I know noone in this country! And I think I will be more able to trust an institution like day nurseries than individuals...But I'll have to pay the price!

Sorry Mel, I wasn't insinuating that nurseries are not good. I wasn't thinking when I posted. I was going to put Seren in a nursey but my work still haven't told me what days I am going in so I would have struggled getting in to a good nursery. I was worried that I would not have the time to get to know the people she would be with but my friend has really helped me out so I am not as worried. She will be going into a nursery soon enough, I think that they are good for them as they get to interact with others.

 

[melhoney]

Oh don't worry, Beanie!!!!
I did not take it like that! I wish I knew someone really, because I myself had a childminder when I was a child, and she and her husband and 2 sons are like my auntie/uncle and cousins! still now! I love them as my family really, and would not mind Maheen having such a lovely relationship with someone, but it just won't happen! You see, I am French, we are muslim, so we would like to find a "french-speaking and muslim" childminder...hard task isn't it! And close to my work!!! too many criterias!!!!
I agree, nurseries are good for children to socialise and interact with others; that's why we are going for this option. I still need to find a good one, though!
Take care,
Mel xx

 

[Manda]

As most of you know were heading back to uk in 4 weeks from oz i'm staying with my mum in Wales and Dan is staying with mates, the plan is for me to work while i'm at mums and then any money i earn pay off my credit card and loan worked it out should be able to do most of it in a year then whan me and Dan get a place again i wont have to work (i'll be moving away so would have to pay for childcare if i worked) or at least work part time around Dans shifts.

 

[lisa31]

I went to look at a nursery on Friday. I feel very lucky cos my Mum is having Heidi 2 days a week and I am going into work next week to ask if they will either let me have all day off on Wedensday or half a day off - that way she will only be in the nursery two days. I have a feeling they wont let me do it though - and I woudnt blame them - I have deadlines all the time when I'm there - unless they keep the girl on who is doing my job at the moment? Ummm will have to see.....

My D/H earns too much so we arent entitled to anything. We get Child Benefit but thats it , all because D/H has got a good job. Its like your punnished for earning too much and having a good job!!?? - same as with me - my salary is pretty good, so its not worth me going part time - as the benefits we get would nowhere near match my salary. Plus it would mean giving up my company car and that would be no good for us, because with that I dont pay any tax, insurance, breakdown or any petrol at all - so its worth going back work even just for that.



L x

 

[hels]

Were in ther same boat, we earn too much for any tax credits too
Im dreading going back to work, but im going part time, and OH is going to go part time too, he works for an agency so he can work his hours round mine. We have worked out that he will do 3 days pw and ill do 2 days pw then have 2 together. Thats until we move nearer to my mum who will have charlie 1-2 days, whuch will mean we can have more time together. I also have a friend who child minds, but we both do 14 hour days, so not very practical, although she said she would have charlie.
I have been back to work for 1 day OH and charle had the best day, i had a terrible one, cried all the way to work!! LOL. still not sure when ill be back permenantly.
How about the rest of you....am i the only one going back soonish?????

 

[lisa31]

Awwww poor you ((Hugs)) - I bet it is awful leaving them. When I was at the nursery looking round, there was a little boy in a bouncy chair all on his own and I stood there and I could feel the tears in my eyes starting cos I just felt sorry for him - and I thought that might be heidi in a few months time.

I am due to start back work end of august

L x

 

[Manda]

I'll be starting as soon as i get back to uk probably about 6 weeks by time we get sorted i'm really lucky mum will look after Abi, plan is to stay with mum clear debts then we move back ino our own place debt free and i wont have to work and hopefully we can try for baby #2 the job i've got lined up is shifts although not sure of shift pattern but it means i'llgrt to see more of Abi than if i worked days

 

[melhoney]

I am lucky in the sense that I only go back for a week at the end of July and then, school holiday again for 6 weeks, so I will get to spend some more time with my Maheen...But I am dreading it already to go back in September!!!! Esp. that my MIL will lok after her and I am not much comfortable with that...but had no choice really!
Am the same as youi girls, salaries are 2 good for getting anything!!!
Mel xx