The ubiquitous sleep question

[Coffeecake]

Hi ladies, my little girl will be 10 weeks tomorrow and currently I haven't established any routine where her sleep is concerned (I'm a first time mom, bear with me lol) and I was thinking now's probably a good time to do that. At the moment she goes to sleep for the night when I do which is around 11 - midnight but I read an article that basically said I'm a horrible mother for doing this and babies should be in bed by 8pm at the very latest and to have the same exact routine every night. So I have these questions for experienced mothers like you.

1. What time is best to put baby to sleep?
2. What is the most effective routine (that works for you)?
3. Does your little one sleep in their own room or in yours?
4. What do you do when they wake up during the night?
5. Is it a bad idea to let your baby sleep in your bed? I keep getting conflicting information about this...

Our daughter sleeps in her crib in our room (sometimes in our bed) and I worry she may not be getting a good night's sleep with the TV and my husband and I talking etc. When she's asleep she doesn't stir much but I wonder if she'll be better off in a quiet room? She seems to like noise and activity around her though, she sleeps better in a noisy restaurant than she does in a quiet room.

I'd love to hear your experiences and any advice you can offer. Thanks so much!

 

[twinkle84]

Hey, I'm no expert and need some help in some places myself! From 2 weeks our LO slept from 11pm after last feed straight thru to 8am the next morning in our room in Moses basket! I personally would have rather him slept thru our night than go at 8pm and get up at 4am even if that does seem selfish! Anyway I was worried about routine etc but Aiden did it himself, at around 3 month he was going to sleep earlier and earlier and I'd dream feed him at 11 so he still went thru the night! Now at just 5 months he's in own room in cot, goes down for half 7 and straight thru to 6 7am most nights! Without dream feed! I did put him in bed with me last night though cos he just wouldn't go back to sleep at 3am!! Wish I hadn't done that!! Everyone says flow same routine every night! We do bath at 6:30pm ish, a few stories or nursery rhymes, bottle and bed! Hope this helps a bit?! X

 

[MrsR]

For the first 3/4 months we'd settle Seb to sleep in his Moses basket downstairs and then just take him to bed with us when we went (we co-sleep 90% of the time and love it) upstairs. At 4 months he started setting his own routine of going to bed at 6.30 so we'd give him a bath at 6.00 then a bottle straight after and then put him in his cot. Then when he woke for his night feed we'd put him in bed with us. Now at 6 months old he goes to bed in his cot between 7-7.30pm (again a routine he chose) and when he wakes for a bottle we put him in with us.

 

[xxbeckyxx]

I understand about the wanting to sleep in a more noisy environment - Lizzie was like that until about 12 weeks so we left the radio on overnight
A bedtime routine has worked wonders for us - I do it downstairs with the lighting low and TV turned down. We start with a massage with baby lotion ( I actually think she associates the smell with sleep now cos I used some during the day once and she fell asleep 5 minutes later!). Then I put a new nappy on, swaddle her nice and tight in her blanket and give her a last feed. She's probably technically too old to still be swaddled but it works so well
Her eyes normally start to 'droop' during her feed so I know she tired. I take her upstairs, put her in her crib (next to my bed) and give her dummy. Then I give her nose a couple of strokes so she closes her eyes, and she normally drifts off as I leave the room.
I start her bedtime at 7:30 and she's usually asleep by 8. Throughout the whole routine I don't talk to her or even make eye contact really, we try to keep it really low key.
Same when she wakes in the night - no talking or eye contact, I just feed and put her down again.

I wouldn't worry too much about bringing your daughter into your bed with you at her age so long as she's not near your covers etc. I used to bring Lizzie in with me when she decided 4am was morning cos it was just easier than resettling at that time! Can't do it any more though cos she's learnt to roll and I'n too scared she'll escape!

 

[Amy_J]

my lo has only just gotten himself into a routine despite me trying for months! his day time naps are now at a minimal, sometimes only half an hour in the morning and afternoon which means my 6pm he is exhausted!! for the last few weeks he has had his dinner at 5pm, a bath at 6pm, and a 7oz bottle at 6.30pm which he falls asleep whilst drinking & goes down straight into his cot! if he is still awake i put him in his cot,put his music on and he drifts off no problem.

as we only have a one bedroom apartment, his cot is in our room. we usually shut the door and go next door & can hear everything obviously. he doesnt seem to mind noise and can sleep even when i hoover during the day! i made sure day time naps were always in the living room with me with noise and music and light etc so that early on he could distinguish between night and day. i found this to be really important.

he has only ever slept through a handful of times but i dont mind as i know he is waking due to hunger not habit, he is usally asleep when he has his feeds at night (he falls right back as soon as the bottle goes in! lol) has a change and then sleeps through until the morning, usually about 8am!

hope this helps a bit!

 

[ZMD]

my lo is 6 monthsi bath her at 7pm then get her dressed and give her a bottle she's usually asleep by 7.30pm and normally sleeps through until 6-7am she went into her own room when she was about 15 weeks x

 

[Coffeecake]

Thanks so much for the suggestions, when you say give him a bottle, do you give it to the baby in the cot? I'm breastfeeding so not sure how it will work... lol

 

[xxbeckyxx]

When I was breastfeeding I used to do the main routine downstairs and then go sit upstairs to give Lizzie her last feed, with the room darkened and quiet, then put her into the crib after winding.