'The Contented Little Baby Book'

[beanie]

One woman I knew managed sucessfully on the Gina Ford routine, so I am not saying it doesn't work, just that it won't work for everyone. I tend to be a person who likes to go out on a whim, and am never organised so perhaps it was unrealistic for me to think a routine would suit my baby. Its just that there is so much pressure on for mums to have a baby sleeping through at 6 weeks when in fact it is both normal and natural for them to be waking up even at 6months and I just think books like these add fuel to these pressures. I understand though she has made changes to her book though following criticism about restricting feeds to every 4 hours and the harm it was doing to breastfeeding mothers, though the sceptic in me still thinks she is making it seem that all babies should be able to fit into a routine when its not the case.

I am also a full time mother (who happens to go to work for some of the week ) and have ever found not having a routine aproblem. Perhaps I was lucky with the nursery, they adapt to Seren not the other way round.

 

[Rosieroo]

in fact it is both normal and natural for them to be waking up even at 6months

As DS has shown me

 

[enn]

Cool cheers Urchin. I bought the book as I am interested in getting a routine going as I feel it would give a sense of security. This is my first baby and I need a little guidance but after watching the bringing up baby series I'm not convinced I would want to go as far as that woman on there who did the 50's method. Just wondered what other people have found.

think claires at the baby show in london tomorrow so if i see her im gonna punch her in the face and blame hormones

btw i aint put my baby on a routine she went sleep and woke up when she wanted. food when she wated (formula) and now she sleeps 12hrs a night sometimes 13

 

[Rosieroo]

I think that's the Claire that did the continuum concept, (Claire Scott) not Claire Verity (but I could be wrong). I read the the NSPCC had requested confirmation from Bounty that they wouldn't be using Claire Verity in future shows due to the complaints about her last year.

 

[Rosieroo]

Actually I just found this

The Baby Show Official Statement re: Claire Verity
"Claire Verity was invited by Tommee Tippee to appear on their stand at The Baby Show. We understand that Tommee Tippee has now withdrawn its invitation due to controversy surrounding Claire at the moment. We support this decision in the interest of our visitors and guests.The focus of The Baby Show is for our visitors to enjoy great shopping, get information and above all have a fun day out."

But that totally contradicts the fact that they were asked not to have her there in the first place

 

[lauramumof2]

It made a great prop when I had to raise the top of Seren's crib when she had a cold, apart from that it really helped my PND when my child refused to go into a routine and made me feel like I couldn't do anyhting right. So have a copy of this and the baby whisperer basically unread

I honestly and truly believe that that book is responsible for a lot of PND. New mothers are very vunerable and if their baby doesn't fit in with what the book says they can feel like they are a failure.

Yeah, you read it before the baby comes when you are thinking semi clearly then you have the baby, come home and try to follow it then the sh*t hits the fan when you realise you have brought home a baby and not a programmable machine.

I sold mine on ebay,

 

[rachie29]

my friend used Gina Ford and swears by it... its too regimented for me though. I have bought Jo Frost (supernannys) book and I think i am going to work from that.... everyones different though..

Also i thought you might like to know none of the methods used in Bringing Up Baby are advocated by the NSPCC, Claire Verity in particular as they were all used to the extreme.

 

[AnnaR2B]

I have no experience i'm gonna be a first time mum, but i have read a few of these books and i have to say....for me....the baby whispererer book out shines the others.
Its like a routine but without the rigidity of times, think i'll be having a look at that. Me and hubby want to have some sort of routine, but not a schedule, but i understand that if i can successfully breastfeed, then you need to feed 'on demand' (hate that phrase) for the first couple of weeks to allow milk to come in?
Not sure, but i love hearing others opinions on this

 

[lauramumof2]

baby whisperer is good. Her programs were excellant. Its such a shame she has passed on, she looked so natural with babies. A real loss. I feel awful, im struggling to remember her name.

 

[Fluffy Bunny]

i understand that if i can successfully breastfeed, then you need to feed 'on demand' (hate that phrase) for the first couple of weeks to allow milk to come in?

Yes, to begin with you will need to offer the boobie everytime your baby cries (if nappy is clean and doesn't settle quickly with a cuddle), I think I was feeding every couple of hours for around 30+mins each time, although this can vary widely, this will help you establish a good milk supply. You will feel like you've permanently got them out for the first few weeks but it soon settles and I found Evie got herself into her own routine of feeding every 4 hours (ish!!) herself by about week 3-4 (hard to remember it seems so long ago now!)

Good luck, hope it works out for you

 

[cloud9]

i hate routines...i would not only find it restrictive for the baby but restrictive for my life...

The only routine i had which was after about 6 weeks was bedtiem.. i taught him slowly difference between day and night ...as he started solids he has more of a rough mealtime but he rarely eats much if i feed him first thing in the morning so he does better with a late breakfast. I have a very laid back chilled out baby and i think part of that is i am never in a rush to get things done..he sleeps when he wants i just enocourage him if he is getting tired and grumpy.

i prefer to work on intinct but i am a full time mum which makes that easier fir me to devote my time to my son


I also can't stand anyone telling me what to do LOL

i have the rough guide to babies which give the facts but not rules to follow

 

[Bagpuss17]

I think you can glean useful tips from some parenting books. Not a fan of Gina Ford personally. There's a difference between routine and regiment!

For me I followed my instincts mainly and the useful tips I'd seen from the Baby Whisperer programmes on Discovery Health. We fell into a routine naturally and I have a contented little boy.

I didn't realise that Tracy Hogg who wrote the Baby Whisperer books had passed on. How sad. She's left a wonderful legacy to all us new parents with her books though.

 

[mrs_tommo22]

I read both the books and have never used them. I wanted a flexible baby and wanted to be able to get out, so i wrote my own routine - everything is accetpable as long as she is bathed,fed and in bed at 8. Stephen is in bed by 7:30.

 

[Becs]

This has been such an insightful thread. Thanks so much for all the responses, loads of really good points. I shall read with caution. I haven't read the routine bit yet but have been able to make quite a good shopping list out of the first chapters. I will also look into the other books suggested, especially the Baby Whisperer. I agree with a lot of you though. As a first time Mum, I will want some guidence but I will prefer to trust my intincts after a little while and will not allow myself to feel like a failure if my baby doesn't sleep through by 6 weeks.

Becs xx

 

[xNataliex]

I don't think books are very helpful and agree they can lead to mums feeling bad and not good at it - a bit like diets really!

I like looking for help on the things I feel I need help with but wouldn't rely on a book for everything. This forum is so good because it's lots of people real experience and not just one 'experts' view.

Go with the flow - we have and have the most happy baby and only slightly tired mummy!!

 

[LucyBee]

I've got the Gina Ford book and I use it and follow her routines and have done since Tom was about 3 months old.

It suits me and it suits Tom and I have a happy baby and I know where I am and how my day is going to be.

HOWEVER, I would recommend that you don't follow a book. Trust your instincts and let your baby find his/her own routine.

I'm a perfectionist and there have been times when I wished I'd never picked up the Gina Ford book. When I first started following the routines, I'd beat myself up if we hadn't achieved the right length naps at the right time etc. etc. and that just made for a stressed out me at a time when things are already stressful enough.

Now, Tom is 9 months old and I'm confident enough to be MUCH more relaxed about the routine. I use the Gina book as a GUIDE but if things don't work out during the day, it's no big deal.

Gina's book has had a lot of bad press. It's not as rigid and scary and some people make out. A lot of it is common sense but like some other people have said, it does kind of set you up for a fall by asking you to control this little baby that is totally out of control at a time when you're weak, vulnerable and emotional. The last thing you need is to feel like you've failed when things haven't gone to plan.

Read it with a pinch of salt, that's what I'd say!
Lucy

 

[Mice_Elf]

I didn't get any books with Erin....not because I didn't want to, but I wasn't on any forums and didn't realise that there were any books out there for new mums!

That said, however, Erin settled into a routine really quickly - she did it all herself and the only things that I "helped" her with was learning night and day.

During daytime naps, I had the radio on in the same room at just quieter than "talking voice" level and during night time feeds I didn't talk to her or make eye contact - not as hard as it sounds as I was shattered and just wanted to sleep myself! It wasn't intentional and I did occasionally smile at her and stroke her little head, but we were in a darkened room, just the streetlights outside providing light and with the computer fans whirring, she didn't seem to want interaction the same as daytime feeds.

By 4 weeks her night time naps were longer than daytime and by 6 weeks she was going through from 9pm to 6:30am. She was exclusively breastfed and I think that for her, she was far happier in a routine, although it wasn't in any way regimented, I just followed her lead for naps and feeds.

I also found that she slept a LOT better at night if for 20 minutes before bedtime routine, I let her have time by herself in the baby-gym. She seemed to find that more relaxing.

Just hope that the next one is as easy!

 

[Nicky_Jones]

My sisters SIL recommended the Gina Ford books to me and she found they really worked for her. However I ended up buying a book "Baby Secrets" by Jo Tantum and Barbara Want after watching an interview with them on day time TV. I found this really helped give me some clue as to what to do when my LO did arrive. Before I read it I was really panicking and it helped calm me down. I adapted what it suggested to suit me. So I would recommend doing a bit of reading, but also be open-minded and definitely don't beat yourself up if things don't go exactly as you planned.

 

[LucyBee]

buying a book "Baby Secrets" by Jo Tantum and Barbara Want

I really liked that book. I'd recommend it.

 

[Urchin]

HOWEVER, I would recommend that you don't follow a book.

I really like that book. I'd recommend it.