Stupid woman

[Flame]

I am sure i have complained about my mil before.
Well she has been here since yesterday and she always makes nasty comments like last time it was i dont do anything around the house and i use up all my oh's money when i use only my money and i should do this that and the other with my son.

Well today was the last straw i had just dressed and fed ds and he was playing in his playgym thing while i had a cup of tea and tried to relax cause i had a nasty headache when she comes in in her stupid voice and says i hope your tidying that living room, i'd just tried but its a bit difficult when you have stuff all over from decorating, anyway i ignored it, and the she said something again pretty similar so for the first time ever i snapped and said "dont you think i have enough to do!" to which she responded well K cant do it all all the time, to which i said "oh right cause i sit on my fat arse all day" pretty annoyed by now as you can tell anyway she then says well you wont be saying that when he burns out and loses his job so i said and that will be my fault i suppose. So i got little one ready to go to my mums and went outside to get the pushchair, when i went outside i told oh that it stops or she isnt to come over again and he said that she had some valid points (cause i dont go round cleaning up after him every day oh no ) Well in the end after some arguing i told him i wasnt going back home.

Tonight he has text me and said we need to talk about it and sort something out and he was sorry for upsetting me etc. So i have come home and he is just sitting there as though nothing has happened

Does he not realised i just left him and the reason i came back was to sort this out?!!

What do i do, if i bring it up he will just make grunting noises and sweep it under the carpet.

I am tempted to go into town tomorrow and then go back to my mums again until he does talk about it properly.

Any advice?

Sorry for the longness and vicky pollardness of it.

 

[Krystal]

god not surprised your sooo pi''ed off!! i would try talk to him and if he doesn't take you serious then go to your mams tomorrow

 

[Urchin]

Talk to him and tell him it needs sorting.

Whether or not she has a point or not...it's none of her business and if your OH has issues with you/ the house he should be man enough to say them himself without his mommy saying it first.

 

[Flame]

Good god someone read all that!!

Thank you sooo much for replying

I will talk to him but i'm not sure whether it would be easier to write it down for him to read, that way i remember what i am saying(well most of it) or wait till Leif is asleep later and talk then, probably getting that frustrated i forget something.

 

[Nic'n'Keeley]

At your Mil and Oh

I would write the letter leave it for him when you go to town tomorrow and at the end of the letter state that you are goin to your mums and if he wants to talk and sort things out he knows where you wil be

 

[A&J]

If you feel more comfortable writing it down then do as like you say you are more likely to explain clearer(sp?) and not forget something and then hopefully your oh might talk to you instead of grunt.

Like Sweetcheeks says if he does not take you serious then maybe go to your mums.

Hope you manage to talk to him.

 

[mrs_tommo22]

Tell her to piss off and mind her own business! am seething reading this, mils do not have any idea the amount of trouble they can cause- if he doesnt take you seriosuly go to your mums.

Dont sweep this under the carpet, it will make easy for them both and leave you feeling angry.

 

[trixipaws]

i would just say to him "are we gonna talk about this or not, coz thats why i came back and if we're not doing it then i might as well leave again!"
kick him up the bum! (figuratively speaking!)

 

[Flame]

Ok so i sent him an email with it all written on (odd i know but its better than the little fella hearing it and he does spend most of his time online) but he hasnt mentioned it at all so whether he will claim he hasnt read it when i know he has or bring it up later when we go to bed or not i dont know.

 

[Urchin]

Hope you managed to talk to him.

 

[Nic'n'Keeley]

Did you talk to him?

 

[Squiglet]

Ok so i sent him an email with it all written on (odd i know but its better than the little fella hearing it and he does spend most of his time online) but he hasnt mentioned it at all so whether he will claim he hasnt read it when i know he has or bring it up later when we go to bed or not i dont know.

I think that was a good idea tbh.. that's what I do if I have issues with my DH... it's easier than just blurting something out I don't mean... I've put it on paper and had time to think it through so to speak..

DH comes back to me on it though... I think if he doesn't come back to you on that... (i.e. balls in his court its his turn to move).. just go to town then to your mums... don't tell him you've gone... wait for him to contact you..

 

[bobtheunfortunateone]

You have a baby, your mil comes over and hb expects all the house work to be done! You know what I say to them (well it is too rude and I'm too much of a lady. I say enjoy that cup of tea, chuck in a custard cream! Onces the baby gets moving and won't sleep in the day, whats the witch going to say then! Nipp it in the bud now. You will do what you can, when you can, but you need to relax and the baby is your main priority. grrr maybe she can clean up alittle with her witches broom!

 

[Penstraze]

I cant believe all these MIL's from hell I keep reading about lately mines lovely hope that doesnt change if/when we have kids!

The nerve of the woman coming into your house and telling you what you should and shouldnt be doing you definately need to get this sorted now and not let it carry on the more she thinks she can get away with the more she'll do it! Your DH needs to be on your side, mine also pretends like nothings happened after a row when I want to sort it out and if I bring it up I get accused of bringing up a row that was forgotten about and causing another one!!! Stand your ground on this one!

 

[Flame]

Well he mentioned it when we got into bed that night and he said he has spoken to his dad about it and apparently he said that it is because we both speak our minds and we clash (i really hope i'm not like her ) Anyway the decision is that she will apologise and i shall tell her that if it happens again she is not welcome back in this house.

Obviously i am still waiting for my apology and i reckon i will be for a long time yet, but she isnt coming here again until she does.

Thanks for all your advice girls

 

[Urchin]

Good for you! She has a right cheek!

 

[jenna]

Glad its sorted hun

My DH is a right mummies boy and nothing she says is wrong (even when it is) MIL's are so horrible they can always do things better and youll never be good enough for there son no matter who you are

 

[mrs_tommo22]

I totally sympathise though - how can you go and off and do housework when the baby needs looking after - surely a happy and healthy baby is more impotant then a clean house - I do all my cleaning when the kids are in bed.

 

[mamichuli]

Only just read this hun, but Good for you for holding your ground!
Dont let her get to ya, and make sure you get your apology!
Lisa

 

[sazzylou]

my MIL was exactly the same.....

She used to let herself in while we were at work and'clean up" beacuse i wasnt doing it properly. Shed even move furniture around because she thought it looked beter. Nosey old bint. Its all sorted now. I became a lot better at sticking up for myself after my first baby was born! It was great. She wouldnt dare do anything now.