so p****d off!!!

[gemmainthesun]

This is nothing but a complete rant so I apologise in advance!
Im just so fed up of all this now; and I cant help but think what I would be if I hadn't lost the baby, Id be 20 weeks and finding out what we were having this week and yet Im just back to square on. I was doing ok but the last week or so its really getting on top of me again...not just the miscarriage all of it...the whole f**** 4 years of it.
Friends of my husbands have just put on there expecting twins from ivf and I cant help but feel envious, they haven't been trying nearly as long as us and they were always splitting up and stuff I just don't think it fair.
My friends due in a few weeks and I know that's gonna be hard work, im happy for her but shes one of them that talks constantly about herself in every minute detail so when this baby comes im gonna get hourly bloody updates!!
We will be having another FET in sept but it just all seems like such a mountain to climb, they gotta defrost then its got to work and then even if I get pregnant again I will be scared stiff of another miscarriage.
My life just doesn't feel complete, constantly even when im happy theres an ache there that wont go away and Im just so emotionally drained with it!

 

[mylullaby]

I don't blame you for needing a rant!! Totally understandable that with a miscarriage, news of twins and your friend's pregnancy things are getting to you. Don't have any wise words of wisdom I'm afraid but really hope it's your time soon. Take care xxx

 

[Selina13]

I have no words of wisdom other than it's perfectly ok to feel the way you do, it's not fair but it's ok.
I hope your week gets better. Xx

 

[flisstebbs]

Rant away, it is totally unfair how things have gone for you. MC is awful but its doubly awful when you are ltttc and having ivf. Sending you a virtual hug and hope you have lots of good things around the corner.

 

[Blueflower]

Sending lots of hugs and really hoping that things go well for you from now on. X x

 

[Moley]

Sending you love and hugs Gemma x x

 

[YvonneM]

Sending loads of love and xxxxxx

 

[mishi]

You rant away hon!

I remember that feeling so well of not being able to get how pregnant I should be every week out of my head. It didn't go away until after my EDD - horrible.

I really hope your FET goes to plan in September. Too many of our journeys are too long and too painful, but you WILL get there.

xxxx

 

[gemmainthesun]

Thanks everyone xx

 

[Clairabella]

Hi there,
It's perfectly fine to rant away after everything that you have been through. Fx for the FET in sept are you going to do a natural FET? I found the natural FET so much easier than the full cycle less drugs and stress.
Are you planning on doing something to remember your little one? I know its not the as what you've been through but I planted a peony plant Last summer after our unsuccessful IVF cycle I just wanted to have something to remind us of our little embryo.
Sending you big hugs xx

 

[Gabrysia]

Hi Gemma, just wanted to wish you all the best with your next FET!