P***ed off!

[kirstymichelle]

God why cant i just work properly ,

Ok so this month i have got v v faint lines on tests now they have gone , i think its just my hormones playing around cos i feel sick too, i think i know in my heart i'm not PG so i just called the clinic for some provera to get me started , i've had my prescription sitting on the side for Clomid for what seems like an eternity , it will be 38 days ish to be precise and i just want to get started before i hit the two year trying mark! then i thought today what if it doesn't happen on the Clomid i can't ive like this forever, I'm due to apply to Uni this October for nursing but i'm holding back ANOTHER year to see if the Clomid works for me .

One of those day's where i feel really depressed, have i done the right thing asking for the Provera?? x

 

[hayes]

I dont really dont know what to say but didnt want to read and run, im sorry u are having a bad day i will keep my fx tightly for u.

Michelle.x

 

[LouiseB]

I'm sorry Kirsty

I always feel it's a bit dangerous getting the hpts out in our situation because there is just too much riding on it to deal with all the wishful thinking. We so badly want it to be our turn that it's so crushing after we get ourselves so convinced and then it doesn't happen.

One of the most haunting aspects of my failed IVF was very publically getting my hopes up and then finding myself feeling stupid that i thought that it was actually going to work out.

I'm hoping for a pleasant surprise next time, rather than putting myself through all of that again. It hurts too much.

I don't think it was your hormones playing up - i think it was the cheapy tests. You take enough of them, you're bound to get a dodgy one.

I think you just need to take a step back and chill out and after you reach cd 38 take the provera and get going with the clomid

I wouldn't put off your university though. Get it started! People work university around babies ALL the time - don't waste your life waiting for a baby xx

 

[kirstymichelle]

Thanks Louise , i know i tried so many diff tests though incase it was dodgy and got vv faint lines pink ones too on morrisons , reveal x2 wilkinsonsx2 then i left it a coupe of days and tested today with FMU with a FRER and a line appeared straight away where it was supposed to be but then as the correct time 3 mins passed it was just so so so faint i had to conceed and say it was the strip showing through , when i took it apart i couldnt make out if it was grey or pink , so i give in cos after vvvv faint lines last week they would show for sure like a beacon on a FRER wouldn't they??

Last year in October i had this and convinced myself i was PG and my periods just stopped for 6 months , i had faint lines then too .

And uni , i dont want to go incase because i like to breast feed and with it being a nursing placement i wont be able too as baby would have to go into nursery and i dont like that idea of pumping out. I'm going to chill out now anyway no more tests except one before i pop that Provera in y mouth just to be absolubtley sure.

I know what you mean about the failed IVF i think people just take it as a guaranteed pregnancy at the end when unfortunately it sometimes isn't , but you shouldn't feel stupid at all .

I'm keeeping my expectations on a minimum i am not expecting Clomid to work at all and if i think like that then i wont be too let down x

 

[LouiseB]

Well, i was thinking re uni that you could take a year out. Keep going for as long as your can and then take a year out to nurse baby

I don't know about all these different brand of test. I think what is important is the sensitivity and the more sensitive it is the more likely you are going to get a false line.

The diffence in detection should only be a day or two, so using less sensitive test is probably a better idea.

If you think you might be pregnant, then maybe hold of on the provera. Don't have unprotected sex and give it a couple of week and if still no BFP after that time, then take the provera