Smoking & pregnancy - no judgement please

[specialk]

OK so here goes...

Found out I was pg 7th March so I cut down my smoking one day I had 8, then 4 then 2 then stopped....felt proud....lasted about 2 weeks. Baby not planned at all and already have 2 so massive shock...

Then had a massive amount of stress dealing with the fact that my OH wanted me to have an abortion...oh yeah worst time of my life (but hey thats another story) so I started having one at night to destress but then slowly that turned into a max of 6 a day... not helped by the fact that my OH smokes.

Feel awful about what I am doing but its a way of dealing with my stress (I am naturally a highly strung person). There is no excuse and I feel guilty so I told the midwife who booked me in with smoking cessation (this Monday).

At the moment I havent had a cigarette since yesterday morning...I just stopped and am really trying so hard not easy watching OH smoking but luckily we dont live together so its not in my face all the time.

Is anyone having the same experience? Please people dont judge me as I am not proud at all and am doing my very best to kick this dirty habit. Today I have cried lots and been sooooo moody because I am not smoking but just keep thinking of the baby.

Kez xx

 

[Lacey's Mummy]

First of all well done for not having one today!! You've cut down before so you know you can do it!! Don't give up giving up!
Tell your OH to not smoke around you too!
Good luck hun x x

 

[cherrybinky]

I agree, well done for not having one on any day at any time. One less is better than one more.
I stopped before Xmas Eve and havent had one since and its been easy but OH still smokes outside. Have you tried getting some help from the Dr? In my maternity pack there was a leaflet to help pregnant ladies stop smoking bit by bit
x

 

[specialk]

Thanks guys for not giving me abuse. If I had planned this baby I would have given up prior to TTC so am just having to try harder. I am seeing the stop smoking midwife on Monday so they should provide support to keep me off them.

Havent had one for nearly 2 days and had plenty of opportunity to seeing as OH always has them so am proud of myself so far. OH smokes outside but its still hard watching him going for one. I will be strong. I never really gave up fully with ly last 2 so am determined to do the best I can this time.

 

[FebMum2Be]

Well done hun! I didn't stop until 2 and a half months, you doing it this early is fab.. Don't be so hard on yourself, take each day as it comes and when you get a craving try to busy yourself or have something to eat/drink, good luck xx

 

[tinks77]

You are doing so well already, dont beat yourself up about it be proud of what you've done so far.
I stopped as soon as I found out and I've been incredibly lucky that I haven't had once since but I always plan to allow myself 1 and only 1 per day.
So if I got desperate at 3pm I told myself to hold out as I would only be allowed 1, I manged to just keep talking myself out of it by saying 'just last a little bit longer'
You can do it and your OH will be proud and may try to cut down to.

 

[Lexusno1]

I think the fact that you're so bothered about the effects etc and feel guilty says a lot and should hope that no one would judge you on here.

I hope you can get the support you need from your healthcare professionals to kick the habit completely and it isn't too tough on you. I have smoke in the past but never got addicted so don't know what it's like but I'm sure if it was that easy people would quit in a heartbeat!

Keep going Hun and believe that if you put your mind to it then you can do it xxx

 

[star fish]

Hiya. I was a smoker when i found out I was pregnant last time. I stopped straight away, but it made me an absolute byatch! I was so moody and ate huge amounts to compensate and shouted at OH if he smelled like he'd even sat next to a smoker.

But it does get easier, you already know that its sooo worth it! Now if my OH goes outside for a fag, I dont say anything, though to be fair he only does it occasionally. I know its incredibly difficult, and to be honest my doctors were no help at all. In the end it came down to sheer will power (and chocolate) and emptying all smoking products out of the house.

Most helpful of all though, is the nicorette inhalators. Its the safest but closest thing you can get. It does feel a bit like smoking. Its still bad for the baby, so use it for emergencies, but its much better than cigarettes and it does take away the craving.

xxx good luck xxx

 

[rachcraig]

Aww you will get there, well done for cutting down.

I'm trying to help my oh quit the now, I feel bad for nagging him cause I know it's so hard but I just keep thinking of what we could do with the extra money if he stops.

Best of luck xx

 

[lewisca]

stop beating yourself up u are doing amazing !!! hope u get some help on mon !!! keep u chin up and dont feel too bad if u have to cave like cherry says one less is better than 1 more !!! my mum smoking 20 a day through all her pregnancies and we turned out ok !!! never smoked myself but know it must be hard especially as tri 1 is stressfull enough. remember u have plenty of support from all us girls on here. xx

 

[Toonlass]

Hey hunny, its not easy. I stopped as soon as I got a BFP with my first 2 but with my youngest child I had a nightmare!! My middle one was only 10 weeks old when I discovered I was pregnant, I had only just started smoking again and I was so not ready to stop again. I tried, I really did but only 5 weeks of pregnancy was spent smoke free. I am embarrassed and I feel guilty about it. My youngest is the only one that came before his due date, he was the lightest out of the 3 by far and is slower to learn and is the only one with chest problems. It could be coincidence, the fact that I had just given birth when I got pregnant with him, or that I had smoked throughout his pregnancy. I guess I will never know.
It's not that your smoking and don't care, your trying to stop, you recognise the risks so don't beat your self up about it. I hope you manage to quit and dont spend your time wondering 'what If' like I do xx

 

[specialk]

WOW I am amazed at the support from all you lovely ladies - thanks you guys! Even brought a tear to my eye (dam you hormones!) Awww it means a lot and makes me want to succeed even more thanks.

Toonlass, I smoked very lightly and on/off with my 2 boys and they are both healthy and good birth weights (6lb 13oz & 8lb 10oz!) not that I am condoning it. I have never been a very heavy smoker maybe a max of 10 roll ups a day.

Star Fish, I am eating soooooo much I have already put on half a bloody stone (I was 9st 10lb and am now 10st 3lb!!) Will look into the inhalators. At the mo I occasionally use the lozenges but only suck them for a bit as they make my throat close up!!!

Will keep trying and see what they say/do on Monday. Thanks again I am so touched and was quite nervous putting it on here about the smoking for fear of abuse so am pleasantly surprised.

What is confusing is there is so much in the net that is conflicting - like some say that going cold tureky can harm the baby! Sometimes feel like u cant win!

 

[Princess81]

Hi hun
I personally highly rate lozengers they really help me and I don't cave when I have a supply of them, I'm about to pop one in now actually lol xx

 

[ceris]

hi hon... i can sympathise! I smoked, and gave up the minute i took the PT. I just keep saying in my head.. do i want a cigarette, or the baby... horrible i know, but it has worked for me! I have not had one for 6 weeks now!!
My husband smokes, but he now has to go outside, and never when he is with me. Now that i am sleeping earlier (so blooming tired all the time!) he can smoke when i have gone to bed...
You can do it... dont quit quitting, and think of how worthwhile it will be in the end...
when you need a cigarette, clean something, eat fruit or get your hands busy!

xxxx

 

[specialk]

It's so nice to know I am not alone. To those of you who have managed to quit a huge well done I know its not easy... XXXXX sending big hugs xxxx

 

[jomc]

Don't beat yourself up about it hun... you are trying and thats the main thing. Best of luck for Monday xxxxx

 

[abbiecourt]

i smoked up to 9 weeks hun i felt that sick it put me of smokeing so maybe might happen to u but midwife does try and get u to stop and u can get patches of the doctor, i know lots of people who have had children and smoked throudghout its just one them things hun, not like ya taking heavy drugs x

 

[Bexybun]

I smoked all the way through my first, and this time I've decided to quit completely- anyone who smokes knows this is no easy feat. I say a big huge well done to anyone who tries to quit smoking, pregnant or otherwise- it's so bloody hard! And massive well done to you for trying, I'm wishing you every success. All of us on here that are quitting- WELL DONE US!!!

 

[Tracey M]

Just wanted to say well done chick!! Keep it up ur doing great!

 

[meggymum]

Well done for cutting down hun, it is not easy I appreciate that and with your OH smoking around you (or within range of the whiff of smoke) is really not helpful at all. He should be refraining from smoking around you anyway if you were cutting down or trying to kick it in a normal situation let alone when you are pregnant.

Unfortunately smoking while pregnant in this country is a real taboo, like lots of other things to do with pregnancy. Yes it can harm the baby but lots and lots and lots of other things can too, which I see almost every week with other pregnant women and they don't get nearly enough stick for it.

The girls that just cant be bothered to try to give it up when pregnant are the ones that deserve the stick, not people like you who try to push through a really challenging mental and physical barrier for the sake of the baby.

xxx