smoking flat mate

[gangofgin]

im about 6 weeks pregnant i think and i currently live with a friend until my boyfriend moves closer to where i am. anyway, i was a smoker before i found out i was pregnant (about 10 a day as id cut down loads recently) and so is my flat mate.
my doctor suggested i cut down until i eventually quit but to take it easy because of stress and also i was on anti depressants which he has taken me off instantly, so i am going to be prone to getting stressed etc.
well after finding out i had a couple of puffs of my friends cigarette and then decided i was quitting instantly because the thought of what i was doing grossed me out a bit.
the problem is, my flat mate is smoking around me still, not even making an effort to not smoke near me. ive made a few comments about it and she said 'well the doctor said you should just cut down gradually' like its her ticket to smoke where ever and for me to not be annoyed about it. ive tried opening all the windows and making us both freezing cold and spraying silly amounds of febreze everywhere but she doesnt seem to care in the slightest. the smells even making me feel really sick now.
i just wanted to have a rant about it somewhere

xx

 

[Tiffy]

Wow, that's really inconsiderate of her. Try being blunt about it, maybe? This is you and your baby's health, so it's very important...

 

[gangofgin]

the most amazing thig is, shes a nurse too!

 

[Babylicious]

Who's place is it?

 

[Josephine_Beth]

You shouldn't give up straight off, ween yourself, only because you may get that dreadful cough but it's up to you, maybe try those plastic stick things you get from a chemist or the patches, your body is hormonal and will have a thing for addicting quickly.

As for your flat mate, it's only fair she should think of you. Maybe come to an agreement, like the front room to be smoke free when you are in it. or smoke free full stop. Least you will have a safe place to sit and relax. Maybe mention to her the kitchen is more appropriate?

Ask her politely though, you may get more of a response! And if she starts complying, thank her when you can, I know it sounds silly but she maybe more attentive as to think of you.

 

[gangofgin]

thats another thing, we both rent.
we only moved in 3 months ago and we have a 6 month contract.
i was speaking to my boyfriend on the phone in tears saying i couldnt live here anymore, but i am stuck really...or id still have to pay the rent for the next 3 months but move out, and i really cant afford to do that.
another option is moving to his in london, but id like to be round my friends and family at the moment. plus i dont really know anyone there and he'd be working full time, and i can see me sat in tears at his house day in day out with nothing to do thinking no one loves me. (because crying and being really dramatic is somethig ive been doing for the past 2 weeks). plus theres my work, although i do work for an agency so its shifts as and when.

 

[Babylicious]

Open the windows were possible - and maybe stay in your room when she is home

 

[Josephine_Beth]

thats another thing, we both rent.
we only moved in 3 months ago and we have a 6 month contract.
i was speaking to my boyfriend on the phone in tears saying i couldnt live here anymore, but i am stuck really...or id still have to pay the rent for the next 3 months but move out, and i really cant afford to do that.
another option is moving to his in london, but id like to be round my friends and family at the moment. plus i dont really know anyone there and he'd be working full time, and i can see me sat in tears at his house day in day out with nothing to do thinking no one loves me. (because crying and being really dramatic is somethig ive been doing for the past 2 weeks). plus theres my work, although i do work for an agency so its shifts as and when.

Aslong as you give your due notice, you, by law do not have to pay the rest of the contract, so if you give a month's notice, that's all you give but you maybe liable for your deposit, however, notice has been given, so you should get that back. Any problems, go to your local CAB office (citz advice bru) and you will get the formal answer from them.

Just ask her nicely, she should not smoke around you if you have asked her kindly not to. Or if she wants to smoke, make her stand right byt he window every time!

 

[Sammystar]

why not try to prick her conscience?

You could mention that there's a totally innocent little person involved now, whose health could be damaged by her smoking.

Perhaps that'll promt her to keep her smoke away from you?

 

[Josephine_Beth]

Or you could say something along the lines that cig smoke can cause a negative affect onbreast feeding if you are around it every day of your pregnancy.

 

[ella]

I think you should just ask her to smoke outside - just be blunt, she will get used to it after a few days and thank you because she will be smoking less! Nurses are the worst at following their own advice (I am one so I know).

 

[gangofgin]

i had a word with her again and she agreed to start smoking outside, which is good. but then about 30 minutes later said she was gonna smoke but out of the window in her room. its better though.
shame i had to throw a paddy and get myself so worked up for her to care.

 

[gangofgin]

oh and it also helped that my brother came round and was quite rude about her smoking around me