Should I or shouldn't I?

Discussion in 'Second Trimester' started by -, Aug 11, 2005.

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Should I find out my babies sex?

  1. You and OH should agree to do it together

  2. You should find out on your own and keep the sex a secret from OH

  3. You should not find out at all

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  1. Guest

    Please help me to decide whether I want to find out my babeis sex or not!

    My OH doesn't want to know and my MIL (not that I should listen to her) says we shouln't find out either. Only thing is - I am dying to know! My next scan is coming up in 4 weeks time so I need to make a decision sometime soon.

    OH don't want to know, so should I find out and just not tell him? Will that ruin things? Or should I just wait with him? Or should I convince him he wants to know?

    This is so hard. I never was patient with anything and this is no different!

    I know it will be magical to wait and see till the day of the birth, but it's bloody ages away! :roll:

    C'mon girls make my mind up for me lol :lol:
     
  2. Rosieroo

    Rosieroo Well-Known Member

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    I really want to find out aswell, but I am lucky that DH does too.

    It annoys me when people tell you not to find out, it's a personal decision. All the people that have told us not to find out are from older generations.

    Maybe your OH will come round?
     
  3. Layla

    Layla Well-Known Member

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    I say find out yourself!

    Just coz your Oh and MIL doesnt want to know, doesnt mean you cant either, its your baby too, you can find out and they can wait till the birth and have a suprise :)
     
  4. Sarah W Baby Belly

    Sarah W Baby Belly Well-Known Member

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    I am dying to find out the sex of our baby.

    Some hospitals don't tell you anymore, but I am hoping that ours does. The DH isn't that worried either way and is going ahead with what I want.

    I personally don't like surprises and want to be able to buy all the stuff we need and even name it before it is born.

    If OH was adament he didn't want to know then I would just go along with that.
     
  5. newbump

    newbump Well-Known Member

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    Hi

    Im so curious about the sex of my baby and so is bf, but we both decided from the begining that we wouldnt find out!! it was so difficult at our last scan we both really wanted to know, but know that if we found out we would be annoyed with ourselves, I think its a great surprise to look forward to for us and everyone else, if it doesnt matter to you which one, then i think you should go along with OH and NOT find out!!!!

    Eaiser said than done though :lol: good luck :wink:

    Natalie
     
  6. Guest

    What about if I find out without him though? I still cant prepare can I ? I'm so usless with waiting :lol: He really don't want to know.

    This is a hard choice. I would like the surprise but I know I'm too impatient to wait.
     
  7. newbump

    newbump Well-Known Member

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    Hi Sami

    Im one of the most impaitient people ever :lol: but once I had the scan I was really glad I didnt find out!!! although still so curious, personally I think its better to wait for the surprise, kind of makes the next 20 weeks more exciting as you get bigger and more uncomfortable, but its your choice not mine :lol:

    Natalie x
     
  8. sarahking

    sarahking Well-Known Member

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    Hi Sami,

    im like you, i cant wait to find out and neither can hubby. If you do decide to find out now it will stil be a suprise (just a bit sooner!). I want to find out to get as organised as possible with nursery colours,clothes etc. At the end of the day its your body and you will have to go through pain of giving birth th him/her so if YOU want to know i say go for it!

    do you have any incling (sp!?) as to what sex is?

    xxxxxxx
     
  9. Urchin

    Urchin Well-Known Member

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    Personally I woldn't find out unless hubby wants to find out. If you knew and he didn't I'm sure when discussing names etc you might give the game away which might upset him.
     
  10. michelle82

    michelle82 Well-Known Member

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    Why dont you ask them to write it down on put it in an envelope for you then if he changes his mind you can have a look otherwise I wouldnt I think you both have to want it otherwise its difficult maybe he'll change his mind when he see's it again
     
  11. Lauz_1601

    Lauz_1601 Well-Known Member

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    i like your idea michelle :). I was lucky becuase we both decided early on that we wanted to know the sex, although we had people telling us not to. And we still et people saying, what if it turns out to be a boy, what would you do then. But im happy with our desicion, it's nice to be able to giver her a name rather than 'it' but its up to you hun! good luck x x
     
  12. beanie

    beanie Well-Known Member

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    A friend of mine was expecting his first baby and he did not want to know but his wife did, so she found out. However a few weeks later she slipped and said "he" and my mate was gutted as he really wanted to wait. I personally could not keep it quiet and would accidently say he or she but if you think that you can do it then find out. However like you said you're still not really going to be able to do much without giving the game away, unless you hide stuff maybe??

    I'm a pretty impatient person and it does annoy me sometimes not knowing especially when buying clothes but there are lots of unisex clothes out there. However it doesn't bother me now, I only have 18 weeks til I find out and I want OH to be the one to tell me what our baby is so I am personally going to wait, but like everyone else said it is personal choice and you will do what feels right to you
     
  13. -Cat-

    -Cat- Well-Known Member

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    I wanted to know to start with, but then I changed my mind. Think of it this way . . .

    When your a kid, you always want to find your christmass presents and hunt for them to sneek a peek at what your getting. One year I actually found all mine and saw what they were, instead of being really happy and excited by this, I instead found that christmass was a bit of a let down, as the surprise and excitement had gone.

    Im so glad I have decded against knowing as its fun using old wifes tales to guess, and I cant wait to find out on the day, it really will be the greatest surprise of my life, plus the joy of phoning everyone up afterwards and anouncing what it is! instead of just saying 'its born'.
     
  14. boo boo

    boo boo Well-Known Member

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    Im gonna have to find out, im so impatient and dont think i could last till the end, i have been per excited for the last five weeks, since i found out the date for my 20 week scan, only two more weeks and i wil know. God i could never be one of those people who wanted it to be a suprise, i wish i could tho. Everyone is telling me that i shouldnt find out and that im stupid for doin it, but i need to. Lol

    bec x x
     
  15. Guest

    Everyone keep saying to me "are you gonna find out - do you know what it is yet?" - It's making me worse :lol:

    I like your idea Michelle - I might get them to do that. I'll have to try not to peek whilst they do it though :lol:

    Argh I'm still wel confused. I'd love OH to agree to want to know aswell but then the waiting is what makes it so much more fun I guess.

    I'm a capricorn and like pleasent surprises but am well impatient!! :roll: :wink:
     
  16. tracyM

    tracyM Well-Known Member

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    My hubby wants to know this time but I don't. We've decided that if baby lets us see, then we'll find out, if baby doesn't, then we can't.

    Last time we didn't find out. We both really wanted a girl (after two boys) and I felt that if we found out and it had been a boy, I'd have spent the rest of the pregnancy feeling down about it. Finding out at the birth it was a boy wouldn't have bothered me so much, because there'd be all the excitement about the birth.
    Kind of like finding christmas presents in June and being disappointed until Christmas if they're not what you wanted, or waiting until christmas, getting rubbish presents and being all excited anyway just because it's Christmas. I do all my christmas shopping two days before christmas so they don't have the temptation

    Tracy xx
     
  17. Guest

    I know what ou mean about the christmas feeling, but then xmas is one month before my due date and my birthday 2 weeks before my due date so I'll still have surprises :lol:
     
  18. futuremum

    futuremum Well-Known Member

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    I like Michelle's idea but if the hospital does not want to do it, I think it might be better to wait even though you are impatient. I was lucky my b/f and I wanted to know. The good thing about this is that my b/f wanted a girl and when I told him we were having a boy he was disappointed but after a few days he got used to the idea of having a boy and is planning to buy the full Liverpool kit which he would have felt a bit akward to do if it was a boy lol

    But I understand what you feel, I was dying to know 2 weeks before the scan. If my b/f did not want to know, I would have waited and you can still do the nursery in colours that suit both,usually you don't get tired as much than if it is all pink or blue.

    At the hospital, i will bring the enveloppe and the paper just in case lol
     

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